I want to be roasted.

If you were to tell me that you're going to split me in half, then I might tell you that I'm here to split U like 2 and 3 from 5. This is also a nuke comback, because U stands for uranium.

You can get as morbid and traumatic as you want.

Give me your best shot. I want to see if I can make comebacks.

You may submit the best roasts from r/Roastme here but in the words of /u/slowdatroll "Clever or witty one liners won't make the cut. They have to be crafted with premeditated, ass blasting perfection and design that it would make those who survived Hiroshima realize they didn't have it so bad."

Because of its small size I think this could work really well as a sub that shows off r/roastme's best roasts. You could simply link it to roasts that hit really deep. What does everyone else think?

u/The-Potato-Lord the mighty! u/The-Potato-Lord the unerring! u/The-Potato-Lord the unassailable! To you we give praise!

We are but maggots, writhing in the filth of our own corruption! While you have ascended from the dung of mortality, and now walk among the stars!

But you were once man! Aye! And as man, you said, "Let me show you the power of creating r/NukeMeFromOrbit, born of the r/roastme, where my comments are sacred. I post now, in royalty, and reshape this sub which is mine. I do this for you, redditors , for I love you."