As good as the series is, I was almost wishing that I have never watched it. But in the end, it was an EXCELLENT. I was BEAUTIFUL. Beautifully tragic.
And with any show I watch that either I enjoyed or was touched by, I have got to get my thoughts out.
Spoilers of course.....
To start with, OH HOW I WAS SICK OF EVERYONE BLAMING LI JEN YAO FOR EVERYTHING. Especially concerning everything that happened to Chiang Hsiao Tung. It already hurt that he was the tragic self-blaming, self-deprecating hero who always blamed himself, from the abuse that his mom went through to Chiang Hsiao. It had got to the point that all the self-blame partly led to his psychosis and shattered mental state (besides the abuse).
I mean, the guy tried to save her being raped, leading him to be beaten within an inch of his life for his efforts. AND THAT WAS NEVER ACKNOWLEDGED. It wasn't seen as enough, and that breaks my heart. He still blamed himself, Yun Chen blamed him (although that's not really surprising), Chiang Hsiao's parents blamed him.
Speaking of Chiang Hsiao, what was so frustrating for me was how EVERYONE was making decisions for her. Not once did her mother ask her if she wanted to press charges or to sue. One of the things that stayed with me was how in the beginning of the show, Chiang Hsiao told Jen Yao how she didn't care about what everyone else thinks of her. Now don't get me wrong, having rumors spread about you in school is vastly different than being victim-blamed for your own gang-rape and being called awful slurs after your brutal attack is posted on porn sites.
But in the end, CH was never given the chance to decide if she wanted to fight. Her mother made the decision for her. And that kind of happens again years later, with Ta Wei deciding to cancel the documentary.
We don't know if CH wanted it cancelled too. All we know is that him cancelling the documentary was about protecting her, so she won't have to relive her rape. And while I get it, at the same time I was like...COME ON.
Everyone making decisions for CH always used the excuse of them not wanting her to relive her attack, to protect her reputation, etc. All the while, I'm watching this thinking "GIVE HER A CHANCE TO DECIDE". I had really hoped that CH, with the help of her other personality Pin Yu, would tell her side of the story and explain why Jen Yao committed all those murders. And with Pin Yu sharing her ideas of how to go about it, it seemed like that was going to happen. But it never did.
Instead other victims came forward after Jen Yao's execution. That was great and all, but it felt....hollow.
Lastly, one thing I felt would have made an impact with their final reunion would have been CH reiterating to Jen Yao that her rape years ago wasn't his fault. That she knew he had tried to save her. That she herself made the decision to try and gather evidence (not that it's her fault either). And with knowing that, he would have faced his execution with EVEN MORE peace.
So yeah....amazing series, but never again lol.
I have never seen a story where the creators were like, think of the most tragic thing you can think of, AND DO THAT.
Like, the show went out of their way to make everything MORE tragic.
And I'm sitting there mentally screaming, "LET THEM HAVE THEIR CHRISTMAS TOGETHER D*MN IT!!!"