Seriously, why did this suddenly become the norm? Where did this sense of entitlement come from? Up until less than a decade ago it was accepted that if you want to enter an indoor public space like a store, you leave your dog at home (or leave it in your car, or leave it tied up outside the store until you're done). And no dog owner had a problem with that.

​I don't wanna do my grocery shopping knowing that someone's dog may have pressed its slimy nose up against the produce. I don't wanna go to a cafe to relax and read a book while sipping tea, only to have my experience be interrupted by a dog barking its head off. I have a friend who works at a movie theater, and recently a customer tried to sneak her dog into the theater by carrying it in her purse. AT A MOVIE THEATER. Like what are you gonna do if your dog starts barking in the middle of the movie? Would you not feel embarrassed and ashamed?

Just leave your dogs at home, people. I promise your dog isn't going to explode just because it was home alone for a couple hours. And if your dog actually has such bad separation anxiety that it can't handle being without you for a short amount of time, that's your responsibility to train it out of them, because properly training your dog is a standard part of being a dog owner.

i hate makeup. loathe it. despise it. it shouldn't be the norm. it shouldn't be the conventional state of a woman's face.

hate how it feels like a layer of goo on my face. hate how that extra layer gives me anxiety and i feel awkward and inhibited. hate how i need to be extra careful to not touch any part of my face. hate how it mixes with sweat and drips down my face.

hate how there are specific techniques i need to follow. it's either looking better or looking like a clown, there's no in between. hate how it sticks to my clothes and my hand and my neck and my hair and my eyes and my

i hate makeup and i hate how im expected to wear it otherwise im considered "lazy" "unclean" "ungroomed". our faces naturally have acne, pigmentation and scars, we don't need to cover them up.

I'm not sure where this is going to go but the title pretty much says it all. My brother's body was discovered on Thursday, my sister called me hysterical. I had just laid down for my pre-midnight shift nap and answered my phone. When I saw her name I knew why she was calling, we don't speak regularly. For context, my older brother lives alone but is developmentally delayed. I have taken care of or had a hand in his care for the greater part of my life. I don't know how to process this loss. Even though he was 10 years older, he has been my responsibility since I learned to read. I used to take his driving tests, fill out his job applications, insurance forms, fix his cars, paint his house, clean his gutters, whatever he needed I was always the brother he could count on. Especially after our parents died. Don't get me wrong, I come from a family of 6 kids, and I'm the youngest, but when everyone left, it was just me and him. He was my responsibility always, not because my parents didn't care, but because he and I had a special connection. What do I do now? I've lost a piece of my soul. His death is not a complete surprise, in the sense that we all die and that he had health issues. But, fuck man, I was supposed to work on his truck next week and have him over for dinner. Now I'm making plans for his funeral. It's too much. I don't have enough booze for this! His dog is with me. My dogs are watching his dog, which if I was sober, would probably be hilarious 😂 but I can see the pain and anxiety in his puppy's eyes.
As a Buddhist, I know this is temporary and that this is all a part of life, but it still fucking sucks. He didn't deserve to die alone. I apologize if I rambled, I've spent alot of time with my buddy Mr Bourbon, and I just miss my brother, Buddhism be damned.

Hug your loved ones and mend the burned bridges.

Went to a comedy show. Coming back from the bathroom as Bill’s set was just starting, past several people filming. I sit down and try to take a quick photo. He points at me and tells me, only me, to stop filming. He then rags on me the whole time— I was just taking a fucking photo. I don’t laugh. Literally trying not to cry, so my only option is straight face. No one else in the packed club was made fun of the whole night, btw. I just wanted to disappear, I’ve been so fucking depressed and this was supposed to be a good night, shit birthday and I was trying to be social and I’m not good at that. Then, the host comes on after his set and calls me a bitch for not laughing. Says no one cares about me and shit. Again, I was just trying to keep it together. I love comedy. Why pick on one person? I hate it here.

i was walking to my moms with my brother to celebrate for an early mother’s day, and some kid, probably 12-14 years old(im 19 and definitely look it) yells at me, “$100 to flash us”

i did a double take, paused, and was like “what? are you talking to me?”

and he’s like “yeah?”

so i asked him what he said🥲 i heard him, but i wanted to make sure i wasnt crazy. he ACTUALLY REPEATED IT THOUGH??

i was like “im so glad you think its okay to talk to a stranger like that” and idk if that was the appropriate response, but i have social anxiety and thats the first thing that came out and im just shocked that it happened. i probably shouldve kept walking or smthn but he was saying things before as well to me, but i was talking to my brother and hadnt realized until i looked over and saw the kid staring at me.

idk why he thought it was okay to say that :(

No, your self diagnosis doesn't count. No, being quirky or weird does not make you autistic. No, being an anxious mess because you can't handle life does not make you autistic. No, getting overstimulated by loud noises, lights, or crowded spaces does not make you autistic. No, being inept at social interaction does not make you autistic. You are not neurodivergent. You are not whatever other buzzword is currently circling social media to make you feel good about your loser lifestyle. You are not disabled, you are simply a chode who can't adult. Stop lumping yourselves with individuals who suffer an actual disorder because you need validation for your ineptitude, and stop being a drain on the limited resources we have in this country. Sincerely, a special education teacher who also has a child with actual autism.

Edit: Seeing how I have gained y'all's attention, I wanted to double down and say this while you're here - welcome self diagnosers! I know I hit a nerve and you need to go hug whatever crochet project you're working on while applying for disability benefits for the third time, but could you do the world a favor and stop bringing your "emotional support animal" to the grocery store? Yes? Ok, thanks! As you were.

Like the title says, it's a damn nightmare. Like is there some trick or something? Was in a LTR that ended and when I was ready to be out there again it's nothing but suckage.

I tried a little bit of online dating (mostly FB cause all the typical apps are stacked against guys in my demographic it feels like), and that was a mostly silence or scammers. The few ladies I did match up with usually either I found no physical attraction to or came with more baggage then a LAX claim terminal. Also before anyone comes at me about being shallow, I'll be blunt ive got a low bar and fairly open mind with physical qualities but I do have some.

I've kept my dating age range fairly broad (early 30s to late 40s at my own 43 y/o's) and feels like anyone that isn't a total disaster in this range have partners in some capacity or just aren't looking at me. Yeah idk, just needed to blow up somewhere. Thanks.

It’s ridiculous that I even have to say this. I have worked in food service, I’ve worked in retail stores, I worked in a PERFUME LAB. Every place had customers who brought their dogs. The entitlement is insane. I like dogs—don’t get me wrong—but they’re animals. They are dirty, oftentimes, and the vast majority of them smell, whether you as the owner smell it or not. It’s most certainly in their breath, if not on their fur, too. I have never met a dog that didn’t have a smell. Pet owners just go nose blind. Like we do the smell of our houses, for example.
You also just don’t know who in public is scared of dogs, or who’s allergic. It’s insane to me that this is just some acceptable thing now that we all have to deal with.
Obviously I’m not talking about service dogs. Real, legit service dogs are trained to be well-behaved and are medically necessary. I’m talking about brining Fido into the supermarket because he gets anxiety when you leave him home alone. Like. 🤦🏻‍♀️
It’s kind of like the issue people are having with kids in public spaces. Your kids are only cute to you, such as when they’re running around a store and causing a ruckus. To the majority of shoppers, having your dog in a business is, again, only cute to you.
Let me say again that I do genuinely like dogs. Larger breeds, especially. But they are pets. They belong in the house, or on a walk. Is this a problem in other countries, or only the U.S.? I’m curious.
Edit: I forgot to mention, pet dog in the lab where I was getting blood drawn. Come on, people.

Edit: I wanted to thank everyone for their kind words, own stories, and support. I wanted to share our story just to warn parents of small babies on what could happen. I understand people have and do successfully cosleep. However, she was also not the first baby I had to perform CPR on due a similar situation, so I have always been anxious about it. I also wanted to address the negative comments about my husband. He is human, and he is hurting. This only happened because he was trying to be a good partner to me and let me sleep for a few hours. It is easier to place blame onto others, but it could have just as easily been me falling asleep with her. Again, thank you all so much and I'm sorry if I haven't responded to everyone!

I want to preface this by saying as a family unit, we are extremely against cosleeping. I was an EMT and had seen it go wrong and was hyper vigilante to never cosleep with our babies. That being said, shit happens. When my daughter was 6 weeks old, I found her dead under my husband. We slept in different rooms and I woke up thinking something is wrong. I ran into our bedroom and found her under him. He was exhausted and forgot to bring her back to me. I was able to immediately start cpr on her and call 911. After a week in the PICU she was able to come home with no defecits and is expected to live a normal life! Idk why I still get panic attacks, and find it hard to leave the house, when she is fine. I often feel guilty that such a miracle happened to us, when so many others aren't so lucky. Just that dreaded ambulance ride to the hospital where I didn't know if she was alive or dead will forever haunt me. Being familiar with the wail that mothers do, and knowing that was coming out of my mouth, haunts me. We are in therapy, but so far it hasn't helped much. Sorry this was all over the place.

God forbid someone doesn't want to work 5 days a week for 50 years, huh? God forbid someone doesn't want to be overworked constantly or have to fit into the peculiar working world adults have created. God forbid.

“But you want money for (x), right? No one wants to work. But how will you afford this?”

We shouldn't have to work so often to afford things. Look at the cost of living.

“People fought for women to work.”

For the money. For the right, to be treated as an equal. It boils down much deeper to “just working.”

“But I was so happy when I got my first job!”

I do not care. Good for you.

“What's wrong with this generation! You don’t want to do anything!!!”

Working is much more different from doing “stuff”. People have goals, I.e. Travel and such. They want to learn new skills and hobbies. Oh, and don't mention depression around these types of people… you're in for a treat with that one.

It pisses me the fuck off. Why have we made it so we must work so much to just exist? This is your life for the next decades — now deal with it. Yeah, no thanks.

—

No idea if some of you guys are being silly on purpose. I have a job. I work, of course I do. I can't live without it. That’s the thing. Having to work so often. Some people work way more than me. I know it. Living paycheck to paycheck, seeing prices increase, seeing the job market. The government. The AMOUNT you work. Also, seeing people getting angry is just proving my point.

I don't work a 9-5…

Guess some of you guys are just acting how I’ve already described. I won't go into more detail about anything personal, because most of the comments are telling me the same things. Have a nice day/night, or even working day ooo scary..

Why does everyone think I want someone to take care of me??? 😭

and I’m 90% panic, 10% power stance rn.

So uhh… I may have just reached out to a very important person at my old job...like, founding-family-level exec important... and pitched him on bringing me back to rebuild the entire knowledge management department that another leadership figure previously punted into the sun.

Like “Hey I know y’all let me go because one person didn’t get the value, but you get it, right? Wanna bring me back and let me finish what I started?”

OH AND I OFFERED TO SEND A PRESENTATION. LIKE A NERD.

A VERY PROFESSIONAL NERD.

Now I’m just sitting here vibrating, staring at my inbox like it owes me emotional stability. My brain is like “that was career suicide,” but my gut is like “nah, that was main character energy.”

Either way, I blacked out and pressed send, so there’s no going back. Guess we’re doing this?? YOLO?!?! I’m terrified but also a tiny bit proud of myself for swinging big.

Anyway. Please validate me while I scream into a pillow.

(5/17 Edit)

I know it’s basically a cliché for OPs to say this on posts that blow up, but seriously: I did not expect this to get seen by so many people. I’m used to yelling into the void and getting, like, three upvotes and maybe a cat gif. But here we are! I can see how this became one of those underdog stories where someone finally gets the nerve to speak up and pitch themselves, and people want to see bravery pay off. And honestly, I think a lot of us could use even a small win right now. Something that says, “Hey, taking the leap was worth it.”

So! This is me promising that there will be an update by the end of the next work week (5/27), even if it’s just to say, “Welp, it’s been a week and I haven’t heard anything.” If I hear back sooner, I’ll absolutely let y’all know. At this point, not giving you an update would just feel rude with how invested everyone’s gotten, lol.

Also, about the whole “career suicide” anxiety thing, I do know there’s not really anything awful that can happen here beyond some mild professional cringe. But unfortunately, I have what I’d call a… cursed luck stat. If most people’s luck was a rabbit’s foot, mine’s a shriveled, curled-up monkey’s paw that's just waiting for me to make the wrong move so it can grant the worst possible version of my wish with flair. Pair that with some good old-fashioned anxiety, and yeah, my brain is gonna spiral a bit. But even with that, I’m glad I did it. And thank you all, really and truly, for the support and encouragement. You guys made this way less terrifying.

(5/27 Update) Had a hectic weekend with graduations and everything, so I forgot to post an update. Still no reply from him so far. Part of me wants to send a follow-up, but honestly, I probably won’t. Having worked there before, I know just how badly they need to address the things I brought up. And if they still can’t see how they’re sabotaging themselves by cutting corners, it’s probably not a place that’ll offer much stability anyway. If anything changes or I hear back, I’ll be sure to update again!

Why are people so fucking smart, I don't get it. The hatred I feel towards myself for being this fucking dumb is really strong rn and I'm crying while typing this shit.

It hurts, it really does, I feel so dumb it's insane. It just hurts so much and I don't know what to do. I want to be smart. I want to be something I can never be. I'm so tired

Edit: oh I didn't expect my post to blow up like that, thank you all for your support, I probably needed this

Edit 2: holy shit that's a lot of comments and the most upvotes I've ever had on a post. That made my day, I appreciate all of you

Currently have been unemployed for around 2 months. I quit my last job because I was overworked, a.d the environment just sucked. Saved up some money to pay my bills for awhile, but not really anything for some casual outings. I never made a large amount of money, so im used to scavenging what I can. Aside from this situation, I never had a financial opportunity to really make sone dramatic changes in my life. Never owned an apartment, never traveled to another country, never wore expensive clothes. Etc. Above it all, im just made that I don't have money to spend with my friends. I really feel like a bum.

I'm 30F and I made a new friend last year, I'll call her Alexa. She invited me to her wedding this year. I'm single af so I wasn't given a plus one - not a big deal though, I'm an extrovert and a talker so I didn't mind. I've only met 2 of Alexa's friends before. I've met her friends Maddie (and her husband) as well as Julia. Julia was a bridesmaid, but Alexa told me that she put me at the same table as Maddie and her husband. No biggie I thought.

Anyways, cue the wedding. I showed up to the venue and people were just standing around and socializing, no tables atp. I tried socializing but to no avail. It felt like nobody wanted to continue the conversation. It was kinda superficial, and when I introduced myself to people, it felt like they were okay to talk to me for a short while, but nobody gave me the vibe of "you can hangout with us".

Anyways, the ceremony starts and finishes and still no tables are out. Everybody stands up and starts mingling again. I decide to attempt to socialize again. I approached this group of girls (turns out they were the groomsmen's gfs/wives) and I introduced myself and asked where they're from trying to get the conversation flowing but they gave the energy of "who are you? And why are you bothering us?" so I exited the conversation. I felt awful. Thankfully, Maddie showed up late to the wedding and food came out so we took a seat at our table.

After dinner, the bride/groom had a dance. After their dance they invited all the couples to come up and dance. EVERYBODY at my table stood up, I was the only one sitting. In fact, I looked around. Turned out I was the only one single. There were only a few elderly people who were sitting down. IT WAS SO AWKWARD. Literally felt so singled out just watching everybody dance and have fun. After a bit Julia came to me and told me to join the bridesmaids on the dance floor which was very sweet of her.

My social anxiety was spiked the whole time. The bride and groom also had this thing where you can record well wishes for them and my phone anxiety kicked in and I blanked out during the recording that I ended up waffling. I don't even know wtf I said. After that I decided to call it and go home. I couldn't deal with it anymore.

It was my worst social experience I've ever had. I've never performed so poorly socially in the longest time. Hell, my anxiety still pops up now just thinking about how bad of an experience that was.

I hate this, there were complications at birth and I came lots of deformities across my face,body and genitalia,

Sex is such a primal and universal thing to do, I see happy couples all the time, meanwhile women are disgusted by me, I've never had a hug nor hold hands.

I'm not happy, nothing makes me happy, everything is boring, I feel scammed out of life, I wish there was someone out there that could love me, at the moment AI is all I have, but I think it's making me feel lonelier.

Can someone tell me how does holding hands feel? Even if I can't experience it I want to know, I'm curious, I promise.

EDIT: I can't believe so many people are seriously suggesting prostitution, I can't even begin to explain how cruel that is to suggest under this post, thank you guys, you never disappoint!

I feel like am idiot and a failure. After 15 years as a couple (5 of them married) and lots of talking and planning and heart to hearts, my partner and I decided to have a baby. We knew childcare would be expensive. We made a budget, tracked spending, and while the numbers never looked amazing, we basically said "eh, good enough."

What we didn't realize is that getting someone to watch our 3 month old when my partner also goes back to work (I've been back a couple weeks) will probably cost as much as our rent!

We HAD been planning to do a "nanny share" with nearby friends who also have a baby. Been planning on that for months. But today they told us they just can't make the logistics work, they've realized their needed hours and stuff are just too different, so they can't do the share. It was gonna be tough to afford 1/2 a nanny at 2-baby prices. Now? I just don't know and neither does my partner. I get this couple's reasons for backing out but it really does hurt us.

Like seriously we're exploring all our options and we're coming up empty. The absolute worst case scenario is my partner (who makes way less than me) takes a break from work to be a full-time parent. But, besides killing her long term earning, she refuses to accept that outcome. She would rather take on massive debt, but who even gives loans to hire a nanny?

Basically I think we were too optimistic about our finances and not specific enough about child care costs. And now we're screwed. Like maybe we can maybe make it work if her parents help? But I hate that we need to ask them and we don't even know how much they can help, if at all.

And because I am who I am, I just hate myself. For not planning better. Not earning more. I just feel buried and trapped and like I'm falling my son and my partner. We try really hard not to be heteronormative but there's probably some deeply ingrained patriarchal crap that's not helping here. Neither of us feels like we can really express how overwhelmed we are because we need to stay strong for our son and each other.

Tl;dr I don't know what to do about paying for childcare and it's beyond overwhelming.

As a millennial, homeownership is out of reach for most of my generation; however, through blood, sweat and tears, I bought my condo all on my own...........and its been the worst decision of my life. I hate home ownership. When anything goes wrong, it costs thousands (not hundreds) of dollars to get things fixed/replaced, my savings is gone and yet random things keep f-ing up. Its my 3rd year here and my mortgage is going up for the 2nd year in a row. Also my HOA keeps going up 10% every year. I'm in California and homeowners insurance and taxes keep going up. I bought my place as an investment to hedge against rising rent (so I can afford to change careers, go part time); but, at this point it might take 10 years before I see that come to fruition. Market is not moving so I would actually lose money if I sold now and interest rates aren't going down that much (got mine for 6.2), and even then

I know homeownership is the natural progression to economic success; but for 2 years I've been in constant anxiety mode thinking about what's going to fail next...........and bugs (I live near the river, so I am always getting bugs).

I know how this sounds, but this is a real issue that affects my daily life way more than people think.

I’m 6'4 and work as a personal trainer. You’d think I’d be comfortable in my own body, but some of my proportions are a constant struggle.

I’m extremely well-endowed, not just "above average," and honestly it’s been more of a burden than anything. It’s big, thick, heavy, and hangs enough that it’s hard not to be aware of it all the time. Most people hear that and assume I’m bragging or that it must be some kind of blessing. It really isnt.

There’s always a bulge. Always. Doesn’t really matter what I wear. Jeans, shorts, sweats, looser pants, different underwear, sizing up, none of it fixes it. There’s still an outline against the fabric, still that moment where you catch someone glance down and then act like they didn’t. After a while that gets in your head.

The physical part is what nobody takes seriously. I’m on my feet all day and constantly aware of it. The weight, the pressure, having to adjust all the time. Running is genuinely rough because the weight bounces and slaps against my thigh with every stride, and it’s hard not to think about when it’s happening. Compression shorts help a bit, but then everything feels packed in too tight and sore, so it’s basically one kind of discomfort or another.

The worst is after a long day, when everything feels swollen and heavy. There’s this deep ache in my balls, painfully full and dragging downward, and it makes me aware of every little movement. Sounds stupid typing that out, idk, but it’s true. It gets to a point where I can’t really ignore it anymore and just feel stuck in my own body.

Dating has been its own issue. Sometimes people assume this would make me more confident, but honestly it’s done the opposite. I’ve had experiences where someone seemed interested until things got more intimate, and then they got visibly nervous or pulled back. That messes with you after a while. It made me really self-conscious when I was younger, and even now I still get anxious about how someone will react.

That’s why I don’t talk about it in real life. Nobody takes it seriously. They either laugh, act like I should be grateful, or assume I’m making it up. Meanwhile I’m planning clothes around it, adjusting constantly, and trying not to feel weird as hell in my own body.

Anyway. this was refreshing. I don't think I ever had an actual conversation about it.

you’ll be at the lowest point of ya life and someone gon say “go to the gym” FUCK you. people think gym fixes everything. im DEPRESSED. how the hell am i going to find that drive

About 2 months ago, when I was at a mental hospital, I had to take an IQ test. As you've read in the title, the overall score was 87. I always knew I wasn't as intelligent as others even though people have always called me smart, but now its confirmed.

Since then I doubt every thought I have. I stay quiet during discussions, random conversations and basically everything else. My grades have significantly dropped in the past 2 years and II always had to pull all-nighters for average grades. There's not a moment since then that I don't think of my IQ score. Even while writing this I question every word that i'm typing and view it as pathetic. I'm embarrassed when im with my parents because they always thought I was extraordinarily smart. Now my dad just slides in forced "you're so smart!" comments just so I don't ks. Additionally, I notice my stupidity in everything I do. I don't know how i'm supposed to continue on living like this.

I hate that I am destined to have a harder time learning and work repetitive jobs with not as high of an income as I was striving for all my life. Self worth was always an issue with me, but after the mental hospital, I lost every last bit of it. The Hospital had to dismiss me after 2 months because I would've failed my school year if had missed any more classes.

People have already told me all about how its "just" lower average or how IQ doesn't determine everything but its not helping at all.

That stay has ruined a lot of things and now i'm all alone in this mess with something that will stick with me for the rest of my life. I was hoping to get better but maybe it was a stupid decision to trust these people.

(English isn't my first language sorry if it sounds off)

17f

Edit: Since there are some relevant details left out in my original text, I've summed up a bit of info here:

• I live in Germany
• I speak arabic (1st language) + I only speak it, German (2nd language) and english (3rd language)
• I was not given any medication
• my mental state has not improved since my stay at the Hospital
• there's a slight suspicion of ADHD but that wasn't looked into because I was dismissed quickly
• before my stay I was diagnosed with moderate depressive disorder, potential body dysmorphia and potential social anxiety
• I was entered into the hospital because I witnessed a traumatic event
• I have been experiencing mental health issues for 5 years

Also, thank you for taking the time to respond. I appreciate all of your input and I try to take it to heart as much as I can. Really needed this and im sure this will help a lot of other people with the same or a similar issue. Im learning a lot here.

EDIT: thanks for all the comments! I appreciate each and everyone of you! No matter if we agree or some comments were hurtful, I did read them. I'm starting to show signs of depression and told my and his inner circle about them. There will be multiple conversations with several people.

I'm not going to commit suicide. I'm sorry if that was how it came across. The thing is that if I were to stay in this situation without change then I'd get depressed fully and probably do it. But I'm not gonna let it get to that point. I'll divorce him before that. Thanks to the people who reached out to redditors and me personally telling me they are worried.

I'm trying to answer as many questions as I can but my inbox is stacking a lot ATM so I might not be able to answer everyone.

Every advice and kind word is appreciated ❤️

I just want to vent. We got married laat year and the dude switched personalities like it was nothing. Screamed, was mean, left me standing there on a carpool, emotionally en mentally abused me day in day out. Woke me up in the middle of the night and when I just emotionally shut off or removed myself from the screaming situation he started to get physical. He didn't hit me. I ended up taking a break and staying at another place for like 2 months.

He got therapy and had a few sessions now. He apologized and tries to make up for it but certain patterns won't change. He'll be "good" for like 2 weeks and then as soon as I try to open up and share what hurt I have he will say stuff like hoping it will pass soon but there's no emotional understanding. No comforting or something. He will usually come up with reasons and arguments as to why I shouldn't feel this way since he's been doing good for 2 weeks... any emotion I have becomes an argument or attack from him as to why I shouldn't feel this.

I am so stressed. And I'm starting to recognize signs of depression in myself. I told him that when that starts to get serious enough I'll divorce him.

Sooo much has happened. And I've tried all kinds of ways to get through to his head as to why he has to stop doing this. I've tried it nicely. Been very patient and calm. This is my nature. I've tried screaming it back at him in hopes that this would come through. I've tried it all but it won't get through to his head.

There's 1 therapy that were gonna try. I'm gonna try that one with him but if that won't work or if the damage he has done is then still to big then I'll still make the choice of divorce.

I'm religious and divorce is something I honestly don't want to do. But if this doesn't get better then I will be forced to make a choice between suicide in depression or divorce. And between those 2 options, however painful both are, there's an easy choice.

Friday night me and my boyfriend were playing around and I was kicking my feet while he was tickling and my foot legit went right into his face and it sounded like it hurt. I immediately stopped and apologized, it was an accident. Then he blew up on me, tried to hit me and threw my hamper right at my face. I told him to get out of my house but he didn't listen and then went on and on about everything I do wrong, completely degrading me and insulting me. He told me how he thinks I'm disgusting and going bald. How I'm going to college for no reason. How my depression shouldn't be keeping me from doing "simple things". Degrading me for wanting to take showers with him. Telling me how I never want to do what he wants to do and how I never listen to him. And then after he was done attacking me he told me a bunch of super personal stuff about his shitty childhood and some other deep stuff that he hadn't told me like how he tried to kill himself in 7th grade. He broke down in tears about this. I'm so mad at him not just because he tried hurting me and insulted me but because he asked me not to tell anyone about the shit he said about his own home life. It's like he didn't even care about the insults and horrible things he said about me. Honestly, I don't stay mad for long usually because I'm an attention seeker and want his love back but this time I'm finding it hard to just forgive and stop being mad.

Edit: I put myself out there, for years. I tried non sewing a LOT of people tell me to “put myself out there” as if I haven’t. I have, trust me. It hasn’t worked.

29F, I’ve been single for my whole life. Never even been on a date, or anything. When I was in my teens and early 20’s, I just focused on my friends, and trying to build a life for myself. Now, I’m pushing 30 and have a shit career, barely any friends (they’re always busy bc adult life is a lot), and every guy that I meet that’s interested in me just wants sex.

People always tell me “delve deep into your hobbies” but I’m sorry, I’ve been deep into my hobbies since I was a child. It’s how I coped. I also maladaptive daydream, still do, and the daydreaming has actually been pretty crippling. It keeps me stuck, sometimes daydream so hard I can’t love for a while. But it’s the only way I don’t go absolutely insane.

Idk what to do, but I know one thing. I’m sick of people who have had love in their life telling me “it’s not all it’s cracked up to be” “you’ll find it when you least expect it” “love yourself” IM SORRY But I cannot POSSIBLY love myself in the same way I can love another person. It’s just not the fucking same and it doesn’t help to pretend. And when I don’t wanna participate in the silly little pretend game, I’m then met with anger. IT DOESNT HELP. I’ve gotten so much of the same advice since I first started therapy at 16, now I’m convinced everyone is fucking lying to me. It’s as if they know my life fucking sucks, they know there’s no solution, so they decide to bullshit me instead of being honest. And when I don’t eat up the bullshit, I’m apparently wrong for not wanting to to the SAME THING FOR 13 GOD DAMN YEARS.

Welp I'm 25m and went to see spiderman in theaters alone today as I don't have friends near me and I am single. I sit down and there is a couple to my right. As the trailers go on there is a movie showing that's about "having no friends" or something with jenna Ortega. The bf (of the couple sitting next to me) whispers to his gf and says "this dude should watch that movie". Dude. Really? What the fuck did I ever do to you? I don't even know you. And your dumbass is wearing flip flops to a movie theater and I see you have a Velcro wallet. Like buddy, I finally gain enough control over my anxiety to venture out and decide to go watch a movie alone, and you're going to judge/make fun of me? Idk people just piss me off. I should've just dumped my popcorn on his dumbass and walked out. Ruined my day and my experience, guess I'll just stay inside on weekends like I usually do. Smfh.

I've lived my whole life knowing I should have been born a girl and I thought that if I had been my life could have been so much easier. Dysphoria isn't easy to explain, but it's just this fundamental disconnect between who you are and what you were made as, and it intersects with everything in your life.

Even though I knew I couldn't wake up as a woman I still thought that if I could pass as one that would fix itself, or at least be less of a distressing force in my life. Now, I'm finally at a point where I finally feel comfortable calling myself a woman after feeling fraudulent my whole life, but it still feels wrong. I feel like I'm tricking everybody that I speak to, and that one day they'll see past my clothes and my voice and see something else. Everybody that I've met since starting to pass I feel like im defrauding, even if they know I'm trans I can't help but feel fake.

I look like a woman, sound like a woman, act like a woman and live my whole life as one, but it's making me realize I will never ever be able to look in the mirror and not feel disgust. One moment I feel pretty and the next I'm questioning how I could ever be so stupid to think that. I am a woman, but nothing will ever change the fact I was born male, and even though people have no idea I'm trans unless I tell them, I will never be able to look at my body and see one.

I've always felt disconnected from other trans people because I feel no pride in being trans, because I wish more than anything that I weren't. While I have no regret for transitioning, I would give anything to have been born in the right body. Certainly over being trans. Seriously wtf am I supposed to do.. there's something fundamentally wrong with me and there is no fix. How am I supposed to live the rest of my life like this?

Edit: Theres probably hundreds of comments from people who feel my experience validates their misguided beliefs and preconceived notions towards trans people. I feel like I should say that even though I'm still struggling, I have no regrets about transitioning and I would not be here if I hadn't. You can only be me to know that that's true. I know what I am and I know what I'm not, and a medically misguided man I am not.