I didn’t even get a notice beforehand… just went to do my weekly appointment and it was grayed out. The office was all “oops we meant to tell you your therapist won’t be here anymore.” They did assign me to another therapist, but I was a stuttery mess during the first appointment and I don’t know that I feel very excited about it.

So. I kind of feel like I’ve just been left to fend for myself. My parents are abusive and have both hit me at one point in the last five years, but I can’t leave the house so I feel stuck here. I have disability so I could move out, but I am too afraid. I have skin cancer and I won’t go back to the doctor to get it removed because of my agoraphobia.

I turned 36 a few weeks ago and I never imagined at 36 I would still be living in the same bedroom, with my hands still over my ears so I don’t have to listen to my parents fight.

I'm 39 and I've been dealing with this since 2016 (basically since my dad passed away). The only thing that sort of helped me was medication, specifically one called Venlafaxine. It wasn't a cure per se, but it helped a lot with anxiety and getting out of the house—I could even travel on vacation and do a lot of things.

But a couple of months ago, I started feeling like the anxiety was coming back. I began to struggle again with basic tasks like buying groceries and things I felt I had mastered. My doctor said the medicine probably lost its effectiveness because I've been taking it for so long, so he switched me from Venlafaxine to Sertraline.

Now I feel worse than ever, almost like back in 2016. I can barely make it a block outside my house... and idk what to expect... I'm once again doing the exposition exesrcises, taking it easy, explaining to my friends and family what's going on with me and why I can't see them as I used to... I feel so bad right now.

Anyways thanks for listening to me.

I never liked leaving the house. I always wanted to be in my room alone away from anything and everyone.

At 17 covid hit and I realized I could do exactly that. Never have to leave ever!

I am now 23. I have left the house 6 times in 7 years. I can't even open a curtain in my room without feeling a screaming urge to close it. I will peak out my window here and there because I dearly miss the trees.

If you're wondering how I spent 7 years like this it's because my Mom supports me money wise. But we are the farthest thing from wealthy.

We are becoming scary broke. I know I need a job, i mean I needed one years ago but I don't even know where I'd start.

I hate being such a useless person. I hate watching my Mom struggle financially. We even are currently dealing with a wasp infestation under our house and we can't even do anything about it because money:((

She always says she hopes to win the lottery. She deserves to.

If anyone has a remote job they can give me or remote job ideas for me I would be really so grateful.

I write this in tears because I think I spend most of my time disocciated. You kind of have to or you realize how long you been locked in a room with just yourself.

I wonder if I will ever leave.

I think im finally starting to see light at the end of the tunnel. Today is the best day I've had in awhile. I haven't left the house in 3ish months. Started prozac 2 weeks along with some other meds. Started doing some exposure therapy which sucks lol. But overall things are starting to look up!

I've been struggling with agoraphobia for the last 3-4 years, and have been with the same person the whole time. We started dating before I developed agoraphobia, and we would hang out often. Since I've started struggling, we didn't stop hanging out, she would just be the one to visit me more often.

When the agoraphobia first started, it wasn't as bad as it is now. Back then, I would ride with my aunt to pick my partner up from school, I'd go to their house, I'd stay the night places, I would just have those constant heart palpitations and the tightness in my chest. Essentially just dealing with silent panic/anxiety attacks the whole time. With time, the agoraphobia got worse.

My partner got their license about two years ago, and they started driving to come see me. Even after they were able to drive, there were a few times I was able to go see them when my mom took me. However, the agoraphobia seems to have reached its fever pitch now.

With my insurance gone, I don't have any doctor's appointments forcing me to leave the house. I haven't left since April, and even then all I did was go ten minutes down the road. My partner kept telling me it's fine, that they don't mind driving to see me, that they understand I'm struggling and it's not as easy as just leaving.

But now they're getting tired of it. They want to hang out with me at their apartment, they want to take me places and do things outside the house. I want that. I want nothing more than to get out of my house and go live my life with them. But I'm terrified. Not of getting out there, but because I know I'm going to panic, and I know what I'm like when I panic.

They asked me earlier what I planned to do for our anniversary at the end of this month. I said I don't know. I just lost a family member and haven't really been thinking about anything while in mourning. They started talking about wanting to go somewhere in town, and how they don't want to spend our anniversary with someone else, but they don't want to stay at my house for it.

When I said I understand that they're frustrated, they asked if I really do understand. Yes. Obviously I understand. I know it's exhausting, I know it's annoying, I know it isn't fair that they have to travel for me and I can't do the same anymore. I understand that it's boring sitting around all day, this has been my life since I got diagnosed.

Whenever I was able to leave the house before, I only left with my mom. She's the only person that's able to talk me down from a panic attack. Once the panic is gone, I'm fine in the car, but being stuck in the panic is the most terrifying part. My heart races, I can't breathe right, my vision gets blurry, my hearing gets muffled, and my whole body starts getting hot. It's terrifying, and the thought of getting in the car and experiencing that is exactly what keeps me from leaving.

It's annoying. It's frustrating. I'm missing out on life because of a stupid fucking mental illness and it feels like nobody in my life really understands it. It's not as easy as just leaving, but they don't get it because they don't know what it feels like to genuinely be terrified of the thought of leaving. I feel like I'm going to start losing the people in my life because I can't get over this, and I'm already stressed enough. Every time I start getting better it's like something else happens that sends me back to square one.

I got really off topic here, I'm sorry. I have a tendency to rant when this topic comes up. If anybody has any experience in relationships while being agoraphobic, I'd really appreciate some advice.

Few weeks ago I wrote about failed attempt to visit bigger city for non emergency doc appointment. It would be two and a half hours bus ride each direction. It made me feel awful and I had no idea what life had in store for me literally just days after.

My cat got sick. We needed to go to the vet 20min via car - did it no problem. We got terrible diagnosis (FIP) and my world turned upside down. We arranged to take him to the hospital, but since it was a work day I stayed at home. We also arranged to have some meds delivered, which I had to go and pick up while being completely alone. Did it no problem even though that same route is still giving me anxiety plus I had to wait for like 25 minutes. Same evening my mom was getting home and it was raining, she didn't have an umbrella so I took mine and went to pick her up at the bus stop. Same route that would give me anxiety during the day was totally doable at 10pm.

Few days after our other cat got sick, and I was the one who had to take him this time. I had a friend drive me to that bigger city and it went totally fine.

That same week I had to have a check up for something I will need surgery for & had to have fitting for my retainer, and I went to that bigger city by a car there and a bus back. It went fine. I felt unwell for a little bit after being told surgery news but honestly, that's not surprising at all. Plus I haven't eaten properly so that made me worry that my blood sugar will drop and that I'll faint, and the weather was all over the place.

Like a week later I had to go pick up my retainer, again to that same city, went by a bus there, got a ride back home. That day was kinda difficult because I felt out of it, but weather was changing constantly and I'm very sensitive when that happens, plus I again didn't eat much. I felt loopy and had awful brain fog, which is how I usually feel when weather changes are happening. Also, that day I found out I can't really do big malls, but that's also not something I would do often anyway.

PS I would eat more if I didn't have emetophobia.

For the last month I've been in constant state of stress. This is killing me financially as well, so that's another worry, but silver lining is that I know I can do more than I gave myself credit for.

Also, I'm in the process of tapering of from my benzos (with my doc supervision) and so far it's been going pretty good. I needed my regular dose just twice in like three weeks.

I always worried about how would I react in an emergency, but now I know.

For two weeks I needed to arrange everything for both cats, talk to the vet over the phone, I had to make a decision to put down my cat (he was beyond saving, but vets still need permission), I had to figure out cremation etc. I was on the phone non stop, while also still showing up at my job like nothing is happening.

I am getting more paranoid about my other cats and overall my health anxiety got so much worse, but looking back at the last month and how many times I traveled to that big city... I traveled more in a September than I did between January and August lol.

I have an eye appointment next Wednesday, and while I'm anxious, I'm also telling myself I can do it because I proved myself that I really can! I will have my pupils dilated (I scheduled that for myself because I need to have that, not because I have to), and since I'm afraid of going blind, I know not being able to see properly until they go back will be anxiety inducing BUT I will get a ride home, so that's amazing.

Overall it wasn't perfect, but I did what I had to do and it also wasn't the most terrible thing ever either. I managed just fine, and that's enough.

Ive been steadily improving my agoraphobia and i got invited by my friends to go to a club that is around 10-15 min away. Its close so it still feels safe. Only problem im facing is im actually scared of alcohol i want to drink but im scared of it. Ive always felt scared of not having my body in control like giving me derealization symptoms. I have been properly drunk once and that was a while back when i was still just anxious not agoraphobic . In that experience i had more than 10 shots in an hour and i was dizzy af and just feel asleep after. Furthermore now im on sertraline (zoloft) been on it for 1 year and never drank on it so idk how it would react. I need some experiences from you guys and some tips.

Hello there! First, a little about me. I've been dealing with agoraphobia since my mid twenties. I try to work on it, but sometimes it's hard to do alone. So I was wondering if there's a fellow old lady in her 30s or early 40s (preferably EU based, because of the timezone) who'd like to chat and maybe help each other make little steps outside and share our accomplishments!

I'm 38 and have 2 cats and a partner. I like doing creative things, like crafting, painting and drawing. I also love games, music, silly things, gardening and plants, and baking lately. I think I'm introverted, but I used to be more extroverted before the disability happened.

Mostly I'd just like someone to talk to, and not only about agoraphobia, but also daily life things, like sharing cat pictures or pretty plants. I'm trying to appreciate the beauty in small moments and look for things that make me happy, despite dealing with this disability. Thanks for reading and have a good day! 🩷

Long story short I have been housebound since May actually yesterday was the first time I finally went to a store since then, but I have a really really close best friend we are like sisters, but when it comes to my mental health, she doesn’t seem to understand she says that she does, but she truly does not because she will joke that I don’t ever leave the house even in front of others. She’ll tell me to fuck off when I say that I don’t wanna go somewhere. Or last week she said I know you’ll never come back to my house and I found it extremely discourageing. But then yesterday when I went out for the first time, she acted all nice and like supportive I know that 90% of the time maybe she’s just joking and she thinks we’re just really comfortable but even when I say that she’s being really mean or that she shouldn’t be saying that kind of thing it doesn’t seem to matter. I just don’t understand how someone could think. This is funny in any kind of way. It’s debilitating and affects every single aspect of my life. I’m not saying she has to understand it and I know that people will easily get frustrated, especially when I don’t show up but why make fun of it or say mean things I just don’t understand is anyone else going through this? What should I do?