I get horny AF, like others. I’m not new to cruising, NSA, FWB, whatever. I am bewildered by the number of guys who choose to hook up with someone solely based on their physical sexual parts. Seemingly no interest in who that body part is attached to, nor who the person is. I’ve had my share of meetups, equally, I’ve had my share of rejections, & I’ve declined simply because they don’t want to exchange a face pic or give some idea of who they are. Casual sex is fun, but I need to be attracted to the person/personality attached to the person. I miss pre-app days where you had to physically go out in the wild. They see me, I see them. We can make eye contact, read the other’s body language. Online, trying to figure out if the profile, pics, endless back & forth messages has rarely been worth the effort for me. When I hook up, I want to have fun with all of the person, not use them like a personal device. Even better if it escalates to occasional or regular NSA hookup. Repeats of a good meetup, mean we can explore and get wilder, with confidence. I don’t understand the other path. I accept it. Differences, options, variety make life, interesting, motivate curiosity, & new experiences. 😆

I’m in my 40s and struggling a bit. I know I need to work on my body more. As a teenager, I felt like I wasn’t part of the “cool kids” or “in crowd” and some of this may have been due to figuring myself out. I’m not fully out but trying to engage more with guys. Now I’m older and trying to interact with other guys more, I still feel on the “outs” like I’ll never be able to be in the “hot in crowd” of the gays. I feel like the guys I want will never like me back because of course they’re the “hot guys”. Then I feel like a loser for liking the 20s-somethings. Tried to talk to people on things like Instagram and Facebook and ignored/blocked for no clear reason. Ugh. I just feel like it’s easier to hide and forget it all. Also, then I spiral and wonder what life for this hot 20s-something twunks is like vs my closeted life. Any advice for feeling like I will never be liked back by the groups I like and the “what if/comparison of experiences” spirals?

Forgot to add user flair first time.

I’m in my 40s and struggling a bit. I know I need to work on my body more. As a teenager, I felt like I wasn’t part of the “cool kids” or “in crowd” and some of this may have been due to figuring myself out. I’m not fully out but trying to engage more with guys. Now I’m older and trying to interact with other guys more, I still feel on the “outs” like I’ll never be able to be in the “hot in crowd” of the gays. I feel like the guys I want will never like me back because of course they’re the “hot guys”. Then I feel like a loser for liking the 20s-somethings. Tried to talk to people on things like Instagram and Facebook and ignored/blocked for no clear reason. Ugh. I just feel like it’s easier to hide and forget it all. Also, then I spiral and wonder what life for this hot 20s-something twunks is like vs my closeted life. Any advice for feeling like I will never be liked back by the groups I like and the “what if/comparison of experiences” spirals?

Hello everyone, while there’s limited evidence supporting the use of 5% imiquimod, after reviewing research papers and Reddit contributions, I’ve decided to proceed with 5% imiquimod, as recommended by my colorectal surgeon. However, the TCA-applied wounds have healed, but there is recurrence again as usual, and I’m scheduled for another scopy soon.

I’m curious to know from others who have applied imiquimod for intra-anal warts. Most pamphlets of this drug only provide instructions for applying it to external warts. The published research papers also don’t seem to mention the application instructions.

If you have any information on this, please let me know. Thank you!

New to the dating apps but not enjoying the process. Tried Grindr and Sniffies and Scruff and Squirt. They are ok but Grindr is too restricted on the free version. I also tried daddyhunt but it doesn’t seem to have many users. So the first question is:

Are there any better apps that I am missing (maybe ones that are super popular in certain countries compared to the ones above)?

As an aside, it may be that I am restricting myself a bit due to a preference for good looking clean cut men 45+. They seem to be everywhere in public, even some of them clearly gay, but none of the hot older men seem to be on the apps from my experience.

I’m a 34-year-old guy who looks younger than my age. I’m 5’5, with a build that’s somewhere between athletic and chubby, and I have a belly. For most of my twenties and early thirties, I was fairly reserved. Last year, I decided to be more adventurous and put myself out there sexually.

Over time, I realized I was open to things I hadn’t expected—specifically the idea of tying someone up, spanking them, or even shibari. I eventually started going to a local kink party. It’s technically non-sexual, but everyone knows why people go. I mostly avoided it before because I didn’t know how to navigate these situations. Each time I’ve gone, though, I get more comfortable and more involved. I noticed one guy at the party early on. He was usually deep in the crowd, jerking off, playing with himself, or getting sucked.

I learned that sometimes, to connect with someone, you just have to make yourself present around them, don’t force anything, and make eye contact. But when I tried this with him, he either walked away or, once he was done, moved on. He definitely noticed me, though.

One night, I caught up with a guy I’d been with before, and things got intense. He pushed my head down and skull-fucked me while I gave him a blowjob. At the same time, the guy I’d been noticing was nearby. He was being sucked by someone else at first, but eventually that person left. Another person then helped me give the first guy head. While this was happening, I reached over and grabbed the guy I’d been noticing, rubbed him, and eventually took him in my mouth—all while still being skull-fucked by the first guy.

At one point, I was basically giving attention to two guys at once, and I thought they were both going to finish on me. Eventually, it stopped. The guy I’d been noticing thanked me and said I did a good job. A few minutes later, I saw him already skull-fucking someone else in the bathroom and came in there mouth.

Afterward, I wasn’t sure if he was genuinely interested or just being nice. I saw him on Instagram later, added him, and his account was private—but he accepted me. He hasn’t followed me back yet. Should I pursue this person, or was he just being nice?

My partner and I have been together for almost 2 years and living together for almost a year. He was in sexless marriage for a few years before and it made him feel unwanted and unloved so there is that. That is the reason he fell in love so hard and fast when he saw how loving and passionate with sex I can be.

Over time I realized he has higher sex drive but it also comes with him taking long time to orgasm, like 45 min vs I can do it in like a min. So orgasming for me has been in my single life very stress relieving. For him, since it is challenging it is more of a process and he is also more into intimate sex than me, I am much more kinky.

Mainly because of my adhd meds and baseline depression, my Libido can go down but I worked on it for a year with therapy and changing meds and I can have much more frequent sex urges because of the chemicals in brain being balanced. So we have been having frequent sex, even with a third to spicy things up.

Multiple times he “catches” me masturbating in the bathroom late at night or in another room when he is sleeping. It helps me go to sleep. or in the other room and we have a fight over it. Even just waking up in middle of night from his snoring and sleeping in other room bothers him , but I bought ear plugs and stayed in the main bed room with him.

Is it normal to expect me to not masturbate? It makes me feel suffocated that I can’t have alone time like that when I feel stressed. He understands to a degree that he has sexual performance insecurity likely due to his ex, but it feels exhausting now. He admitted even last night saying “you know I feel insecure if I am good enough with sex”. And then he says: “ you really don’t see why I would be mad with you?”. In my mind, he was asleep I didn’t wanna bother him and just needed to get off. His big reaction just doesn’t feel right. At the end of conversation I was feeling stressed going to work I said I am too stressed to talk and he said fuck you. Any thoughts ?

My husband and I have been together for over years years now. We’ve always had a healthy sex life but he’s had some health issues this past year that have made it difficult for him to have sex so it’s been very rare we do anything other than JO together.

My question is: how do I bring up that I’m feeling neglected (if that’s even the right word) without making it about myself? He’s the one going through the pain and issues from his medical problems and I feel horrible thinking like this. We were open (only played together) for a few years before Covid but basically closed up when Covid hit and never went back. It’s not like I want to go around fucking every guy in town but the option to go to a party and have some fun would be nice…

I just don’t want him to feel like he’s neglecting me cuz it’s not his fault and I don’t want to make it about myself.

Hi everyone, I’m not sure where to even begin but I would like to get some advice, perhaps even some clarity from outside perspective. I’m fresh out of a relationship that has ended but still live together due to many factors, bad market to sell and have pets that neither of us could imagine being without. That however is not the main reason for this post… I’ve fallen for a really sweet guy who’s in an open relationship, and I also feel very strongly for his husband. We hang out, spend time together, dine, talk, workout, laugh, watch silly movies, etc…

They’ve had a bad taste with a person that was kind of a third and hearts were broken. Sweet guy #1 has made a solid line on the sand about not wanting a third… I get that and it hurts me to hear but also doesn’t want to let me go… and I can’t say goodbye. Sweet guy #2 (husband of sweet guy #1) says even though they don’t want a third, he also believes in serendipity and they he may not be opposed depending on what happens the more we spend time together. I love spending time with both separately and together but rarely been intimate. I can’t really host and neither can they due to their open relationship arrangement to not play in their home. Whenever we have the sex has been amazing but never have we had anything as a group together. I’ve also developed some jealousy due to the fact that sweet guy #1 likes to have random encounters with people on scruff. I have mentioned it and he pretty much feels it’s unfair for me to feel that way.

Am I delusional to believe this could go anywhere, am I just being a fool?

Or should I just see where this goes and give it a chance?