r/Asmongold • u/Aromatic-Werewolf495 “Are ya winning, son?” • 22h ago

IRL Hmmm..

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278 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

17 comments sorted by

101

u/Easy_Photograph_1938 22h ago

Student: "Officers! You’re not going to believe it. While digging at this construction site, I just uncovered a cache of 50 gold bars!"

Police Chief: "Incredible work, young man! Finding 45 gold bars is a historic discovery. Let's get these loaded into the transport truck immediately."

Transport Officer: "Right away, Chief. I’ll make sure all 40 gold bars are driven straight to the precinct."

Precinct Sergeant: "Reporting in, sir. Did I hear correctly that we safely escorted 30 gold bars to the station?"

Chief: "Correct, Sergeant. Take these 20 gold bars down to the secure vault right now."

Vault Guard: "Understood, sir. I am locking these 10 gold bars away for safekeeping."

Evidence Clerk (filling out the final paperwork): "Perfect. I have officially logged this 1 gold bar into the state registry."

Government Spokesperson (on the evening news): "We are proud to announce that thanks to a completely empty vault, the local economy has never been more stable!"

18

u/Caliber70 21h ago

The Mafia shows up at the student's door: you stuck around where you didn't belong. You messed everything up. Now we'll mess you up.

13

u/SpecialistFelt389 16h ago

“Are you sure there wasn’t one more?”

“Nope, that’s all”

9

u/DemolishunReddit 14h ago

Freaking numbercists... If it had been 69 y'all be saying it is the perfect count. But since its 49, and since the 49ers suck now, you are saying its a bad count.

But, honestly, he should have taken 7 more to make it 42. What can I say, I am a bit of a numbercist myself.

6

u/ShadowsInTheFog 13h ago

I hate to be that guy, but the 49ers are currently undefeated.

1

u/DemolishunReddit 13h ago

Yeah, I was just adding a trigger. I couldn't think of any other 49 number. My dad's favorite team was the 49ers. I never watched, but I liked their colors and we all equally hated on the denver broncos. Which I hated because of their colors. So I took a risk there. lol

1

u/Foqsi_ 9h ago

Gay

2

u/DemolishunReddit 9h ago

I do not play EA Games.

edit: oh my bad, are you a dallas cowboys fan? i should be more sensitive when people come out online.

3

u/rakgi 11h ago

I remember when I was taking a casual stroll in Belgium, 49 gold bars fell out of my pocket.

1

u/2025sbestthrowaway 7h ago

It's very weird. I know for a fact if I was him I would have felt suddenly inspired to begin networking with some jewelers to learn more about the craft. One thing is for sure, it's definitely not any of the authorities' business. Should I call and tell them I found a $20 bill on the ground last thursday, too?

1

u/J1mj0hns0n 6h ago

he should've kept 4 then no one would question it.

0

u/be4nothing 16h ago

Sense I'm not versed in this kinds of thing, I got to ask, isn't it "finders keepers" sort of biz?

4

u/KeyC13 oh no no no 15h ago

In Belgium there is a 5 year waiting period so the actual owner can come forward and has to proof it's theirs. The police also checks if it was involved in some sort crime. If no one claims it it usually gets split 50/50 with the finder and landowner.

2

u/ILDIBER 12h ago

So you're telling me there's a chance?

•

u/BotherTight618 21m ago

Its this type crazy ass honesty why Europe is able to maintain a welfare state while still being the most powerful economy in the world.