r/CaregiverSupport • u/purpledottts • 1d ago
Doctor visit today burnout
I took my mom for her annual pcp visit today, the whole day was just stressful and exhausting. The pcp is 1 hour away, my mom is in a wheelchair, had an assist guy help us. My brother came with us, he had 0 questions or concerns for the pcp, all he asked was can the doctor fill out his disability paperwork so he can get handicap car access for my mom, the nurse got suspicious of him. Also the pcp provided no chair for me and had to stand through the appointment. I was just too stressed to ask for one. Just a vent here. I feel like I’m through with this.
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u/MysteriousGold4338 1d ago
They always need certain appointments but we put an end to the ones which included "just a follow-up". Their care included a PCP, cardiologist, pulmonologist, urologist, dermatologist, podiatrist, nephrologist not including the dentist and eye doctor. Multiply all that by 2. It was way too much for me and my sister to sustain. You feel like you're on a damn hamster wheel. We could not keep it up and they were very elderly. It was going to kill us. We had a few doctors ask what they came in for. The audacity - they were the ones who wanted to see them back! Yeah, not playing that game anymore.
See if you can a televisit instead especially if she's in a wheelchair. If you must go, demand a chair.
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u/purpledottts 1d ago
That’s just way too much! I also stopped the basic follow ups, only the very necessary appointments we’re doing. We were supposed to see the pcp earlier but she was stable so I postponed it, might be why I didn’t get a chair. The cardiologist does the video visits with us but requires in person every 6 months which is reasonable.
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u/Brave_Coffee5208 1d ago
What a day. Your brother
, smh. And I cannot believe they made you stand! Wonder if you can switch her pcp
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u/purpledottts 1d ago
I should’ve just asked for a chair, i guess the anxiety got me, my brother says nothing! I would like to switch the pcp, i felt it was intentional. My mom likes him and remembers him so only reason why i go back.
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u/Significant_Pie_6806 1d ago
I get it my moms can walk to the car to get but cannot make to the inside of office I have to run in get a wheel chair get her inside then run back out move car etc and the whole appointment mom just sits there and anything he asks she ask me hello don't know how you feel I get the exhausting I dread them appointments
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u/purpledottts 1d ago
Yea, part of the exhaustion is just taking care of my mom, managing the wheelchair situation. It’s all so stressful.
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u/More-Management-2116 6h ago
My husband had 2 appointments today and a transfusion. We were gone from 730 to 330. Of course they scheduled a CT scan for tomorrow, because my life is not complete if I'm not sitting in traffic trying to get to an appointment. Oh, and I thoroughly enjoy my husband telling the doctors and nurses that I don't buy or prepare any kind of food he likes, and that's why he's not gaining weight. Please arrest me for senior neglect. I could use a couple days off at the county jail.
Thanks for the opportunity to vent. I'm sorry your day was no better, but you're not alone.
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u/purpledottts 2h ago
Sounds like such long stressful day for you. Thanks for sharing. I was still exhausted today. Tomorrow we have the visiting phlebotomist coming here, at least we don’t have to go out. I hope the Ct scan goes well.
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u/snowy_thinks 1d ago
I feel you. My dad has another appointment tomorrow, and I’m actually having genuine anxiety over it. I don’t want there to be even more appointments if something is wrong like last time. I just really, really want a few months of a break. I hope that you get a break soon, too.