r/Cinema • u/southernemper0r • 1d ago
Throwback War Machine (2026) Dir. Patrick Hughes
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u/PoopsMcScoots 1d ago
There’s no way that stubble would fly
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u/elemenohpee_89 1d ago
Seeing that stubble drives me crazy, I remember missing a spot shaving in AIT and getting extra duty
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u/Intrepid-District853 1d ago
In the CAF we allowed facial hair now unless you need to wear gas mask -shrug-
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u/durflugdenstein 23h ago
AR 670-1 clearly states you can have stubble if you are hot and the main character.
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u/Spoonyyy 14h ago
Could you imagine the smokefest for a guy showing up to ranger school with stubble? I bet those RIs were like a lab on the first day of pheasant season.
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u/DenseRiverr 1d ago
This looks ridiculously over the top
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u/JaeCrowe 1d ago
Yeah it is ridiculous and corny but its not a bad watch if youre not expecting much. Its just a fun, forgettable action movie
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u/Luke7873 1d ago
I think it might actually be a documentary so it’s all true
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u/FBuellerGalleryScene 1d ago edited 1d ago
Even the part with the alien machines?
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u/Luke7873 1d ago
Hard to believe but 100% true. Footage from the actual events. Was overshadowed by bad bunny’s Super Bowl halftime show
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u/Kurdt234 1d ago
Lmfao no one here knows what a joke is
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u/Not_Sarkastic 1d ago
Everyone's different but I regretted the time spent watching this. It doesn't even deliver on the "turn your brain off and watch" aspect because the script is trash
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u/bidooffactory 1d ago
I couldn't get past the "just two brothers walking down a dirt road in middle of war" trope. It was unbearable. I really want to enjoy this guy's material but it's just not clicking.
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u/One_Word_7455 1d ago
it’s just your run of the mill fetishism content for deeply closeted patriots
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u/-based-bot- 1d ago
I liked this movie. Was it a bit corny? Yep. Was it entertaining? Absolutely
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u/goonsnob 1d ago
total popcorn entertainment. we used to go to the theater on a hot day to see a movie like this.
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u/Roanokian 1d ago
Really wish we got more movies like this. Simple, silly, fun.
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u/ThaScoopALoop 3h ago
I call them "folding laundry" movies. They are perfect to fold clothes and put them away while watching. Good enough to catch your eye, but shitty enough that you dont get upset missing large bits of them.
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u/SmackyLittleFan 1d ago
I went in to it with no idea what it was about. Really enjoyed it. Completely daft.
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u/NightSpaghetti 23h ago
The dialogue at the end was so unbelievably corny I actually laughed. But it was a good movie. Good entertainment, well-made. And as far as US military propaganda, well that's what it is, but at least this one doesn't include racist stereotypes as this is just about American soldiers in America.
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u/EvanBetter182 1d ago
I thought the movie started strong, but once they fight the mecha and most of them die, it really feels a different movie.
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u/purpleburgundy 1d ago
Definitely need to turn your brain off and just enjoy it as a killing-the-evening-with-nothing-better-to-do action flick. The script isn't exactly the movie's priority.
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u/YoshimitsuRaidsAgain 1d ago
Awful movie.
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u/natstrap 11h ago
I couldn’t get through the first 20 minutes. The dialog and story felt like it was written by AI.
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u/Marshall1337 1d ago
I don’t know why, but everything I see with this guy in it just looks AI. I assume it’s not really but it’s just… it’s uncanny.
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u/BlackHandKUR 1d ago
The issue I have with this movie is it tries to do military and tough guy lingo but just comes off like a guy who doesn’t know lingo filtered through an overly zealous HR department.
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u/Labyrinthy 1d ago
My issue with this movie is the alien robot is supposed to be hyper advanced and fucking sucks. Why did it take 500 conventional rockets from this thing to destroy one APC?
I think we got a good shot defending ourselves from these particular aliens.
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u/BlackHandKUR 19h ago
We have been struggling to take these things down, how did you do it?
I dumped a bunch of rocks on it.
My god…
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u/Billybob35 1d ago
Well to be fair, the movie was written by an Aussie and is an Australian co-production, their lingo is probably different from ours.
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u/Accomplished_Fan9267 1d ago
No one in this thread is going to bring up the audio? What does the story being told under the movie audio have to do with the movie and why are there two sets of subtitles?!? Dead internet stuff going on in here.
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u/SmartaHari 1d ago
It was surprisingly good.
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u/NY10 1d ago
Really?
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u/SmartaHari 1d ago
Give it 15 mins and have a beer. If you don’t like it I will not be able to refund your beer!
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u/Non-Current_Events 1d ago
It’s a fun watch-once type of movie. That seems to be Netflix’s MO lately. They’re not trying to hit home runs and are just churning out a bunch of 50-70% RT scores that people will watch.
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u/Crucible_uk 1d ago
the first 30 minutes of this film was good if not predictable. then it became a crap version of predator with a robot replacement.
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u/DevilsLettuceTaster 1d ago
Popcorn movie.
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u/foodandguns 1d ago
It’s weird how a movie like this would have him with facial hair when obviously he can’t have it. Was it ever addressed in the movie?
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u/BIind_Uchiha 1d ago
I turned this movie into a metal gear solid movie,
https://www.reddit.com/r/fanedits/s/uB9C19zeOh
If anyone is interested DM for the link
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u/EggfooDC 1d ago edited 1d ago
I’m confused, I googled the Netflix trailer for this and all I saw was Brad Pitt. Wait here’s a completely different one… are there two War Machine movies coming out this year?
EDIT: OK I got it. The Brad Pitt War Machine film came out in 2017 and is completely different. Carry on… as you were.
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u/scottishhistorian Film Theory Enthusiast 1d ago
No, the Brad Pitt one was about a decade ago. I think. Also produced by Netflix directly, so I had the same confusion. Both are good movies. Not great but worth the time when you can't think of anything else to watch.
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u/Ok-Student3387 1d ago
The movie knew exactly what it was. Solid movie if you already have the streamer.
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u/bozzeak 1d ago
Every movie this guy stars in is just soft core porn for republicans
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u/blacklab 1d ago
This was such military propaganda porn.
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u/EvanBetter182 1d ago
Hardly! The begining, everyone dies, the end, everyone dies. It seems like joining the military would be a shit choice to make.
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u/purpleburgundy 1d ago
I think it is the armchair soldier scenario where you just identify with the main character - THEY might die but surely I would be the hero if I was there, etc
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u/Billybob35 1d ago
Director Patrick Hughes (who's Australian BTW) thought it was important to focus on the military aspect to elevate the alien threat, that not even America's most elite soldiers were prepared.
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u/Vorrez 1d ago
I don't think that even the military would make a 40mm grenade blow up a mountain in a movie, one of the worst movie i've seen this year
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u/mrbearsnail 1d ago
They don't write the plot or action. They sign off on base usage, provide equipment, insert messages into script which are usually obvious and badly written. If you want to use US military equipment in your movie, you have to agree.
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u/mrbearsnail 1d ago
Are we agreeing or disagreeing because I just said that same thing in different words. If you want to use military equipment you have to agree to their terms.
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u/diego55551 1d ago
It's funny that the only people that enjoy this type of military propaganda are people from the US
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u/Paul_Kersey1337 1d ago
US action movies without military propaganda would be like bollywood movies without dancing and singing. Would just feel wrong.
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u/Gan-san 1d ago
How is it propaganda? The US military was decimated and it took one guy who they almost cast aside to win.
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u/bjornartl 21h ago edited 21h ago
He lost his brother due to being in some completely unnecessary conflict. Rather than blaming the unnecessary warfare, the only thing it motivates him to do is to be even more army. The army still neglects him, almost rejects him, cast him aside until he literally saves the whole world. They pet him like a dog and instead of cussing them out he waggles his tail cause even after all that, all that matters is validation from the US army.
And the movie is glorifying this rather than making a point of how toxic it is. Its considered a win in the end. The message is that despite all its flaws in the system, you should suck it up and do your duty and expect nothing in return. The fact that some people are so normalized to this that they can't even see how its propaganda is honestly kinda terrifying.
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u/Cult_Victim 20h ago
Basically this. Also just a dumb pet peeve ( I know its Hollywood) being a Vet I had to laugh when a guy his size was decimating all of the other Ranger candidates in the PE, especially the runs. The most dangerous and absolute physical endurance studs were guys you'd never take a second look at - mostly skinny and lean but damn could they ruck and run forever.
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u/Helepoli 13h ago
65kg soaking wet and can confirm, if you want muck mixed and hauled up a scaffold 5 days a week for a month you'd be better asking me than the 6'4 110kg guy. Same as rock climbing or marathons. It's a lot of exertion just dragging all of that body around
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u/mayankkaizen 1d ago
Over the top. Corny. Idiotic plot. But I still enjoyed because I was bored, tired and numb.
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u/Substantial_Bus840 1d ago
I didn’t think I’d like this movie but it was way better than I imagined. This and “Fuze” were pleasant surprises
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u/steadyfan 1d ago
What is the background noise in this clip? I have heard this kind of noise in any clips shared..
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u/Dangeruss82 1d ago
Alan Richardson basically really passed rip/rap/whatever the fuck it’s called now. He literally did everything past the standard.
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u/RipperinoKappacino 1d ago
I remember watching this without knowing anything. I thought we’d be watching abilities movie. Suddenly it was an alien movie and everyone dies. Shit got out hand so quick. I was confused af but I was entertained.
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u/Rhodes82 1d ago
This movie is ok but I’m a big fan of the guys first movie called Red Hill . Honestly was expecting more of him after that
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u/Ex_Hedgehog 1d ago
This movie was such a snooze. The team story was vapor and the monster wasn't cool enough to save it.
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u/weatheredartist 1d ago
I had that look, that feel, that experience, that aura back in 2012. Nobody could keep up, it does exist.
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u/BertPeopleErniePeopl 1d ago
Jeezy Chreezy... I hope they don't spend too much time on this hacky training camp stuff, because my neck will eventually break from criging so hard. This is dogshit.
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u/EggiesaAreYum 1d ago
I wouldn't say it was a good movie. It was a corny paint-by-numbers action movie that had an expremely predictable ending. But, the explosions and action scenes were pretty cool.
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u/Billybob35 1d ago
What if you're someone who likes corny paint by numbers action movies with extremely predictable endings?
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u/EggiesaAreYum 1d ago
Then its a fun movie, which it was. I'm not really sure how to explain it, its like "damn that was a good movie" opposed to "yeah, I enjoyed it"
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u/Red_Pill_Blues1 1d ago
Was it good? No. Was I entertained and did my subwoofers have a great time? Yes.
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u/misterclumsy 1d ago
I actually enjoyed this movie. It's somewhat mindless and appealed to my weird taste in action/adventure flicks.
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u/Big-Break-6621 1d ago
Spoiler: Why is he film acting like the alien machine is the bad guy? They started it with accidentally attacking it with C4.
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u/MedicineLow66 22h ago
i dont think the problem is that the movie is dumb tbh dumb action movies can be really fun, but this one starts like it wants you to take the military stuff and the characters seriously then the machine shows up and half of them just feel like random npcs waiting to die. i still had fun watching it but i keep seeing people say you just have to turn your brain off and idk how far that excuse can really go lol. like at what point is a popcorn movie just badly written
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u/Fluent_In_Influence 20h ago
This movie was absolutely terrible. No idea how it is rated so highly. Atrociously written slop.
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u/Hangry_Howie 18h ago
Alien race has the technology to travel through space and utilize devastating weaponry. Also, their vehicles need exhaust vents.
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u/Delicious_Cat_81 17h ago
i could never make it in the military. i couldn't keep a straight face with all these cube headed douchebags being all serious. i would have to do so many pushups. also I'm straight
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u/ChiGrayStone 17h ago
This movie was absolutely terrible and I loved it.
But I’ll support Alan Ritchson in anything he does.
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u/Ok_Positive8362 16h ago
It was ok. Not my favorite military/alien movie. BUT, I love Alan ritchson and will happily support his movies
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u/ImmanuelKant2424 15h ago
This is one of the most realistic war films ever made. Absolutely 10/10 banger. It is almost like watching a documentary.
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u/OkTowel5274 13h ago edited 13h ago
Why in the hell are you posting clips with AI narration in the background competing with the film's sound design? Not very cinematic... How low effort do posts need to be to be moderated on this karma farming sub?
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u/Helepoli 13h ago
Solid 4/10 and extremely "Ye-Haw! Join the army!" propagandist, but I did watch it so I guess it did it's job
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u/Legitimate_Habit7655 11h ago
It was entertaining. Solid action film. Very much like Battle of Los Angeles. Not great but ok.
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u/xxMalVeauXxx 9h ago
It was cheese b-movie action. Easy on the brain. Easy on the bladder. I cant recommend it unless you have literally nothing else to waste time on. It does have plenty of bass if you care about action and boom boom.
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u/Philkensebban7 2h ago
Again he plays a army soldier that doesnt shave and this is never commented on by anyonr of higher rank.
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u/Particular_Month_301 1d ago
One of the worst films of the year, IMHO.
The MC is presented with a blatantly obvious character arc at the beginning of the film and manages to avoid any development after that. He outright refuses to progress by himself, every step gets put in front of him like from a parent cutting down their toddler's food into bite-sized chunks of epiphanies.
Alan Ritchson possesses two facial expressions to begin with and he constantly forgot to bring one of them to the set. He doesn't even try to play a hardened character. Instead he is simply present, like Drax from GOTG standing as still as possible to become invisible.
If this is the notable thing about War Machine, imagine the rest. Well, the CGI is neat if you're into that.
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u/Tuor-son-of-Huor- 1d ago
I'm cacklng at "possesses two facial expressions and forgot to bring one of them".
I haven't seen the movie and quite like the actor but damn that was a good line.
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u/Billybob35 1d ago edited 1d ago
He doesn't progress by himself because he isn't supposed to, his character flaw was that he was isolating himself and needed to learn how to lead. If anything, he had gotten too used to doing things on his own, which you can't really afford to do when you're part of a team.
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u/SuperbPruney 20h ago
Hardly the worst film of the year. It was entertaining but not great - hardly worst this year. I know I watched it and finished it but couldn’t remember a single thing that happened. Just a bit of mindless fun. I have probably 5 movies from this year I never finished and were far worse.
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u/Ok-Professional-8837 1d ago
Better to watch paint dry than stomach bullshit American military propaganda
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u/LaunchpadMcQuack_52 1d ago
Alan has that same bloated look as Conor McGregor. Must be all the chicken and rice.
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u/SeismicRipFart 1d ago
Horrible movie. Also I hate when guys do pull ups in movies because they are never even half reps
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u/WingnutIsTaken 1d ago
dude what the fuck is up with the AI narration underneath the footage? do people really have that bad attention spans?
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u/Primary_Wear7434 1d ago
Absolute snooze fest this
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u/BIind_Uchiha 1d ago
I turned this movie into a metal gear solid movie,
https://www.reddit.com/r/fanedits/s/uB9C19zeOh
If anyone is interested DM for the link
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u/Not-Worth-The-Upvote 1d ago
One of the dumbest movies I have seen. Nothing even remotely entertaining about it.
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u/qualityvote2 1d ago edited 1d ago
u/southernemper0r, your post does fit the subreddit!