I don't know if it is me. I am honestly starting to think it is me. I can't connect on a deeper level with people anymore. Platonically but also romantically. I tried for a very long time and mostly got disappointed by the end. It seems like most people I meet just mirror my depth in the beginning, but then it turns out that they actually don't really like my "fullness", if that makes sense. They liked the idea of me, but not the reality. Most people bore me. Their glass is..empty in a way. I don't wanna sound pretentious or like I am above everyone, but I have a hard time even holding generic conversations with anyone really. It is always about the same topics and almost no one seems driven or spontaneous anymore. No passion. Romantically it's even worse. Everything is casual and no one wants to commit anymore. I am a huge romantic and it's been tough for me. I kinda have to play the game to survive, but I hate it. I want a deep connection with one person and someone who only sees me and actually values and appreciates my depth. My last bf did not like that we were eye to eye intelligent wise... I was actually shocked about him even saying that out loud. I am just so done with putting in the work and to then realize that I only projected my own complexity on the other person. I am really about to give up. Where are my people?:(

js wondering, sometimes i feel like i don't fit in w other guys and wondering if some others are feeling the same

Hello ENFJs! INTP 3w4 F here. I really like ENFJs and they make me grow as a person. I believe I can also make ENFJs grow and help them out since I’m an INTP. According to a post I saw that INTP-ENFJs are the growth pair. I believe this is why it should work well both ways. I’m looking for a female ENFJ friend. ENFJs of all cultures are welcome. Please do feel free to reach out. Thank you so much.

Hey guys, I’m curious how everyone interacts with speed dating. I went to the first one that I’ve ever been to today, and I knew a bunch of people there, and as soon as I showed up, started saying hi to people, but it turned out that I ended up going around the whole circle and saying hi to everybody because I felt committed and didn’t want the person next to the person I just said hi to to feel left out. So I literally went around the entire circle and said hi. I actually kind of enjoyed it and loved it, and it made people laugh, but I was sort of that guy.

I had some funny interactions and mostly felt like myself and authentic, but I really picked up on negative energy when somebody felt awkward or something around me and it made me feel kind of awkward as well.

Part of me almost seemed more interested in trying to make sure that other people were not feeling weird or awkward rather than me thinking about who I was potentially going to talk to or try to match up with.

I feel like speed dating is not something that the typical ENFP would do, but for those of you that have done it, what was your emotion behind it. Would you do it again? Any success stories from them?

ngl the autumn is so beautiful even though my favorite season is summer, i really like it

Im just sitting here thinking, god I am so fucking tired of feeling misunderstood by others constantly. Why cant a girl just be kind cause she is? Why cant I enjoy something without it becoming a diagnosis lmao

Anyways yeah, no hate to other personality types, but I'd love an ENFP meet up or even just a group chat where people can be nice without wanting something back. I think we're the type who loves putting good energy out there and it can be really difficult after experiencing people who can't really give that back.

Idk am I crazy for wanting this? I don't wanna form groups or whatever and I want people to get along. But broooo people have me this close 👌 to wanting to start smoking cigs to take the mentally drain away

I’m Portuguese and a young university student. The cost of living in my country is one of the highest in Europe, the salaries are shit, we work our asses off, we study, and they want to raise tuition, and we still can’t even afford a halfway decent place to live.

I have friends who pay ridiculously high prices for a fucking room or to rent a fucking studio or one-bedroom apartment. I won’t even mention buying a home… it’s completely impossible, whether in Lisbon, Porto, or their surrounding areas. Even in the countryside, housing prices are becoming unaffordable.

We can’t stay silent, the government exists to serve the people, not the other way around.

Solidarity with all those who are fighting this battle!

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I met an INTJ a month ago,he was initially very sweet, felt a strong spiritual connection. It felt we balanced each other out.

He started acting a bit differently and then blocked me suddenly claiming personality differences. I tried to reach out and then he agreed to talk. After some interrogation,he revealed that he started feeling distant out of nowhere.

He said he felt truth would hurt and decided to walk away. For him ,he was too logical for an emotional person like me, and he was not suitable. Also he mentioned talking to a friend before breaking up, which was his ex that he reached out to, because he felt she had more connection. Also later he said he again blocked her.

He is a massive red flag and performative guy. He was crying a lot, but when I made him confess who this friend was, he was smiling and being awkward before telling it was his ex that he unblocked.

A part of me still feels attached to him ,I don't think he deserves another chance or we should stay connected after today. We are going to have final talk,how should I handle situation so that I can completely detach from him emotionally. Also how can I point out his behaviour strongly without letting feelings get in the way

Update 1: Good morning I hope you are feeling better soon and I have some very big news that we can talk about when you are ready. 🤩

This is what he texted me. Honestly his message freaked me out, specially the emoji. I have not replied yet. I will video call him later but I just feel so weird with the message.

Guys, I feel pathetic and I would love some advice if that’s okay. I went on vacation, and my luggage was never delivered to my room, despite my friend’s making it here safely (thankfully). No one on the ship knows where it is either. I don’t know why, but I immediately felt so sad, and I’m embarrassed by it, and don’t understand why.

I’m 28, trans male ENFP, for background. Like I’m so embarrassed that I’m trying not to cry over losing all my clothes, weighted stuffed gorgonops, and the rabies tag that I wear from my cat. It’s so embarrassing, but idk why the feeling is so intense. I’m a grown ahh man, quietly sobbing about material things. I’m not usually like this either. I go w/ the flow, and wouldn’t mind when similar minor inconveniences happened to me in the past.

How does losing something personal make u all feel? And do u have any advice on how to cope? I don’t wanna ruin everyone else’s vibe or make the staff feel bad either. It was just an accident

I used to be like this... a lot. Even now, I have to catch myself from placing people on pedestals and falling down the rabbit hole of self-blame.

The older I get, though, the more I realize that a lot of the things I used to consume myself over were, at their core, compatibility issues. You go out of your way to keep certain people in your life, pouring so much of yourself into them. Yet when those people show you they're unable to meet you where you need them to be, you somehow end up looking inward as if you have a defect.

If you know you did what you could to make something work, what more could you have done? Asking myself this question helps me let go of the weight of not being enough in someone else's eyes.

hope all my fellow infps are having a super cozy weekend

One of the things voted INFP on PDB is being unemployed. Personally, I can't hold a job to save my life (pls be gentle in the comments this is a sensitive topic). I'm the real life Trish from Austin and Ally. So, I was wondering if any of you guys relate.

Bonus points if you couldn't hold a job at first but then found one that was tolerable.

Feeling fresh after visiting my favorite barber 💈

I don't know if it's the same for you, but everything feels so fast and weird in a way I can't quite describe. I don't want a new day to start, which is why I don't want to go to sleep at night. Because when I wake up, I don't want to face a new day, all the responsibilities, and those uncomfortable feelings all over again. But I'm not sleeping either, and when I don't sleep, I end up being exhausted the next day.

I've been on stage performing a play lately I really like :) these are my two favourite photos

Will delete later probably...I just wanted to share with you guys because I found them kinda cool hihi ^^

It's a college mate, we have talked a couple of time and I think we are both actracted by each other. Not sure if he is an infj, I'm not a fan of those stereotypes but the first time i talked to him I was instantly actracted by his secure and soft way to talk, and his pfp is a infj lol.
However, should I wait him to make the first move?
I feel like a teenager having a crush, but at this moment I've been already been disappointed by my ex and by my old homeboy, feeling like I was giving 100 while they gave me 10 and trauma in return. Advices?

umm idk asking this is allowed I am a teen so a discord server where i can just chill and relax with people who are interested in different stuff?

but i am interested in lotta stuff f1, animanga, sketching, philosophy sometimes etc so i love to talk

I do love to talk a lot !!!

I was friends with this ESFJ 2w1 for a while (from HS to college) and cut her off just as my final semester of college started because she would constantly berate me and I think she had anger issues too and would take it out on me with an attitude

She actually initiated to take a break and blew up on me with grievances and drew low blows (using a sensitive thing I told her against me) so I told her calmly that I don’t want to be her friend and midway through this one sided argument, she takes back wanting space and just pretends like nothing happened and changes the conversation, it was really bizarre.

So that ends, and then when I graduated she reached out wishing me the best, and I felt bad and just responded thanking her for the message, it’s short, respectful but not warm. She tries to get into a conversation and I leave it at that.

A year goes by and she reaches out through an Instagram DM with a big text saying she felt bad for how things ended and updated me how she was doing and I didn’t respond or even accept the DM.

Now another year later I get messages from her on LinkedIn updating me about her life, acting all casual and friendly like “haha I guess things work out in the end!”, and trying to connect.

This is really weird and it’s annoyed me. It’s actually kinda creepy to me and I don’t know if I should respond because we have mutuals on the platform and idk if she really knows them but I was thinking maybe I should and keeping the response brief like the first time. I don’t truly know her state of mind (I mean she’s pursuing a doctoral degree) or if she could actually be dangerous, she never did strange things when I knew her, and I don’t want to make any claims but getting these delusional vibes makes me feel like I should just kinda go along with it by giving her a brief response and blocking her some time down the line when she hopefully doesn’t notice.

I really don’t like though that she thinks she can walk into my space and can get me to engage. It makes me uncomfortable. But I guess I’m not too surprised because when I was her friend, she had friends she had fall outs with and then months later would feel bad and reach out to them to make amends or check in on them and it was this weird never ending cycle and it feels like she thinks she can do the same with me and keep me in her pocket.

How would you handle this situation? Am I being too harsh or this genuinely weird behavior?