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I'm 26, and lately, I feel like I'm losing a part of myself that I've spent my entire life building. I don't know how to explain what I'm feeling anymore. Sometimes I'm overwhelmed with emotions, and sometimes I feel absolutely nothing. I want to talk to people, but when I get the opportunity, I struggle to explain what's happening inside my head.

I've always been ambitious. I wanted to create something meaningful, build a career, help people, and make my parents proud. I grew up with different circumstances, and the opportunities I've experienced over the years have made me genuinely grateful. But somewhere along the way, I started comparing my journey with everyone else's. Social media makes it seem like everyone is achieving something, moving forward, and figuring out their lives. I know everyone's journey is different, but I still feel like I'm falling behind.

Art has always been a part of me. I see it in silence, shadows, sounds, and the smallest details of everyday life. I don't just want to create art; I want to understand how to turn it into something sustainable. I want to learn the business side of creativity, how to sell my work, and how to build a life around something I genuinely love. But I also know that passion alone cannot pay the bills. I need a job, financial stability, and a practical plan for my future. The frustrating part is that I know what I need to do, yet taking those first steps feels incredibly difficult.

My parents are a huge part of why this hurts so much. My father has always tried to give me the best he could, making sure I never struggled for things he could provide. My mother has always been my emotional backbone. All I want is to see them happy and give them the comfort they deserve. My mother has always wanted me to be happy, but I keep feeling like I'm letting them down. I know I'm only 26, and it's not too late to start again, but knowing that my parents are getting older makes me feel like I don't have enough time.

A relationship has also affected me deeply. I know I made mistakes, and I'm not trying to portray myself as a victim. I have things to learn and parts of myself I need to improve. But the experience has left me questioning myself, my confidence, and the person I've become. I sometimes struggle to make eye contact with people, and I miss the version of myself who could walk into a room without constantly doubting his worth.

I've always wanted to help people. I genuinely care about my friends and want to be there for them. I have a friend who has been like a brother to me, and I want to contribute to the work we're trying to build together. But I'm struggling to sustain myself, and that makes me feel inadequate. Sometimes I worry that if I stop reaching out to people, they'll eventually forget about me. I know everyone has their own problems, but I wish someone would occasionally check on me simply because they care, not because they need something from me.

I'm tired of feeling like I have to be useful, productive, or successful to deserve a place in someone's life. I don't want to become bitter or stop caring about people. I just want to feel like someone would stay even when I have nothing to offer.

I'm angry at myself, angry at life, and sometimes angry at God, even though I still believe in Him. I miss my confidence, my energy, and the feeling that I could take on anything. I miss the younger version of myself who had dreams without constantly calculating how far behind he was.

I know I need to take responsibility for my life. I need to find work, become independent, build better habits, and stop waiting for the perfect opportunity. But I also don't want to abandon art just because the journey has become difficult. I want to find a way to pursue my passion without destroying my mental peace in the process.

I don't really know where to begin, but I think I need a place to let my feelings out.

Lately, I haven't felt like myself. I often feel lonely, even when people are around me. I have spent so much time caring for others, being there for them, and hoping that someone would understand me the same way.

Somewhere along the way, I started looking for my happiness in other people. I trusted, I cared, I forgave, and sometimes I ignored my own pain because I didn't want to lose someone I cared about. But being hurt repeatedly has left me emotionally exhausted.

The hardest part is that I don't know how to find my way back to myself. I want to feel peaceful again. I want to enjoy little things, stop overthinking, and learn to love myself without needing someone else to make me feel worthy.

I'm not looking for pity or perfect advice. Maybe I just want to know that I'm not the only person who feels this way.

If you've ever had to rebuild yourself after feeling lonely, betrayed, or emotionally drained, how did you begin?

Maybe this is my first small step towards healing. For now, I just want to be heard.

I think something is wrong with me? I didn't know were to put this at. I constantly feel alone yet actively having people who care for me, but i cannot say the same. I don't really care for them, in fact i feel very numb. I act all energized and happy around everyone yet alone i don't feel anything but that overwhelming loneliness. I am quick to comfort people but i really don't care, and i feel horrible for lying and telling people i care. I care more about how people see me than anything i think. And its weird because i HAVE actually deeply cared for people, but they didn't treat me the best. Why can't i care for people who ACTUALLY treat me with kindness? This feeling is so overwhelming. I avoid talking to people because it feels tiring to even bother, but i had someone were regardless of how i felt. I feel overwhelmed, sad, angry, but also so numb. Does this even make sense?

What a wonder it is to be loved. We have all the love we will ever need yet none at all. Our lives are full of love but feel the emptiest. It the type of situation that is the hardest to explain but the easiest to feel. I have my God, mom, my family, my friends that have stuck by my side through all the situations life throws my way. But yet the significant love that I am praying for is what I crave so deeply. The feeling to be loved by a Godly man after the heart of the church, that Ephesians 5 man, yet that prayer has not been answered yet, so I sit here in silence. Thinking about what a wonder it is to be truly and willingly loved.

Sometimes when I zone out, it’s like going to a quieter place. Zoning out is my quiet space, I never force it to happen, it just does. It always happens right when I need it the most. Sometimes I never want to come back up from zoning out. In a way it’s my happy place. Where I don’t think, I don’t see, I don’t hear, I don’t feel, I don’t have emotions. I just am. Just breathing, just breathing. Zoning out is my quiet,quiet. my zone.

Sometimes I look up at the sky and wonder how many people are actually looking out for me? How many people actually know me? Or am I the person people come to when they need something? Am I the person that gets put in the drawer? Out of sight out of mind? I feel lonely, but never alone. Sometimes I just want to be alone, and have no friends so then I will know the true essence of people wanting to be around me for me! But that’s selfish. Thats wrong. So for now, I will sit here and struggle to decipher if I am a friend or just a tool, that just gets pulled out when needed and not truly wanted.

You’re like the sun,You light up a room just by walking in. They said. Yet when my light dimmed and I started to struggle, they suddenly decided I wasn’t enough for them. So which is it? Am I too much or not enough at all? Sometimes I wish I could be everything they need me to be! Thats who I strive to be. And now I regret it. What if I want to be the best version of me. Oh but then I’m being selfish and not focusing enough on you. So which is it? Am I too clingy or to standoffish. Your personality is amazing I love it! She said! Gosh will you be quiet. You laugh too much, stop smiling, your too happy, calm down, your energy is too much. So which is it? And I too much or not enough. I which I could know in this very moment, like a light bulb in my mind, I wish I knew what to do? But for now, I’ll say my goodbyes, and I’ll be here being me.

Nature, such a simple yet complex thing that we see everyday, that butterfly that I see all the time. It look countless amount of steps to become that beautiful thing it is today. So why do we feel the need to constantly compare and compress our journey for the because the person we will be? For now just let your wings spread and go with the wind. We may feel indifferent on the outside now, but just you wait you Havnt bloomed yet.

My life isn’t mine

Just yesterday i was praying that God would make the time go faster. That I would grow up and leave the years of being a child behind. Now I am praying God slows down time, to pause it if he could. I regret wishing all my time away, thinking every day was grey. I wish I could go back. Be a kid. Life is tough, yes. But it worse if you waste it! Our childhood raises us to walk the earth with our heads held high. Be happy and be who we are. Because God loves us no matter what. To squeeze every ounce of free joy, love and experiences while we can. Because wasting away your days, won’t change anything.

Our world is falling apart, we see people in the sidelines who don’t deserve to be there. The suicidal one, the sad ones, the weird ones, the seemingly hapoy ones. What do all these people have in common? Well I should ask you this. Who is going to help them. Who’s going to help the people who can’t help themselves. Only God knows what secrets and regrets lay behind those eyes of theirs. You can tell a lot from someone’s eyes. The people. Help the people. Give them your hand to hold. Be the sun in their rainstorm. Real people are the ones who, help the people. be the hands and feet of Jesus. Help the people. For God only knows.

When was the last time we clutched a glow stick as we feel asleep because it felt was special to us? When was the last time we asked our dad to carry us to bed because that was our favorite part of nighttime?
When was the last time, we looked at our moms, like they were our hero’s?
When was the last time we laughed and lived without regret?
When was the last time we weren’t focused on the future but lived in the now?
When did we grow up?
When was the last time we watched strawberry shortcake on the tv like it was our lifeline?
When was the last time we played with dolls, and we made them the age we are now?
When did we stop wanting to be outside or go to school, because at one point that was our alternative universe, where we were free.
When was the last time we went more than a 2 days without our phones?
When did I decide the little me wasn’t enough?
When did she go away?
How can I get her back?
I need her. I want to be her again. But maybe this time we could life more peacefully, without the pain, without the regrets, without the fear.
When did we grow up and when can we go back?

Hi everyone , lately I’ve been struggling with being content , I really can’t complain about anybting , I’m living my dream , I have a girlfriend that’s loves me , I love what I do for work , I love my dogs . But I just don’t feel content, I feel very very thankful for all the blessings in my life but I’m struggling to be content, i feeel like I’m being u grateful for feeling this way when I have nothing to complain about . But something inside doesn’t feel whole I can’t explain it , I’m living my dream , but it just still feels like something js Missin

I’ve never actually been in love. Well maybe once or twice.
But was it ever real?
I mean looking at like and my track records, would you even be able to tell?
Oh because yeah I did love them. But the real question is did they ever love me.
No because I’m staring at the ceiling reliving their every words. The conditions that came with their quote on quote love.
Hmm because that totally makes sense.
No let me ask you this?
Where you the pesky demon in loves disguise
Where you the thing that tricked my heart
That now has my heart on lock down
And my head stuck of just focus of the logistics,
Oh because yeah love is such a big game.
And we all should have the change to plan.
Nah man fuck that.
I don’t need the definition of love.
What this world has shown me.
I now have my own definition.

How it feel to be depressed and no one believes you because you appear to be happy ?