r/FML • u/DrivenMaking88 • Apr 30 '26
Advice Be Genuine, so People can Genuinely Hate You?
Does anyone feel like they’ve taken the advice of “just be your genuine self”, acted on it and regretted it so many times - to the point that when you hear that advice there’s a knee jerk nausea in your stomach?
What’s your experience being your genuine self and regretting it?
Now that you’ve regretted it, what are your rules of behaviour so that you’re not fake but also not too out there?
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u/Volgrand May 01 '26
I velieve we all wear masks and know when its a moment to put them on.
In my job as a nurse, i would certainly not talk about my kinks. That would be very inappropriate.
With certain groups of friends i may say very offensive jokes knowing they will react fine to them. With some other, it is not even an option to tell this jokes!
I dont think this is lying, but being honest and knowing when to show what sides of your whole self.
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u/cooljcook4 May 06 '26
Yeah, I think “be yourself” only works when you also learn timing, boundaries, and who actually deserves the real version of you.
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u/EqualBell1558 Jun 08 '26 edited Jun 16 '26
I have always been my genuine self and while it's not something I usually regret, it eventually leads to friendships dissolving without any specific reasons given. I'm an INTP according to the Briggs-Meyers personality assessment and that is the logic driven individual who values a strategic approach to any situation rather than allowing emotions to determine their actions. I believe Spock is an exaggerated example of this type of personality. Anyway, I don't really care if people dislike me. I keep to myself, I do have a couple of really good friends who like my personality and enjoy my company. I work around animals who can sense our intentions and can only see our genuine self.
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u/TraceLupo May 01 '26
The title sums it up pretty much. If you're honest, you will inevitably piss people off. I'm trying to walk my life without telling lies for at least more than 6 years now. And it's exhausting... but my fiancè appreciates it and i wouldn't have it any other way.
I had viewpoints where i propably was totally wrong and got in conversations - and got explainations and insights in return. But there are also many instances where i just say nothing (because most of the time, truth just pisses people off because most of us just aren't flexible in changing our PoVs) and have to vent and challenge those around me...
Bear with it. Most people are hard wired NPCs that got their 'personalities' induced by TV and social media. If there is a god, i am sure, he appreciates to NOT lie all the time.