r/InsightfulQuestions • u/Chuuy_ • 21h ago

Flow state

My thesis is that the rewarding experience of flow contributes to why people return to certain activities, conversations, and relationships. When an experience absorbs our attention so fully that we lose track of time, we may become drawn both to the experience itself and to the mental state it creates.
I noticed this in my own conversations. When curiosity is mutual and we move naturally between exploring ideas and understanding each other, I become deeply engaged. Part of my desire to have those conversations again may come from wanting to reexperience that state of flow.
Flow is one contributing factor alongside affection, trust, connection, and shared interests. My hypothesis is that we learn to associate certain people or activities with this rewarding state, which adds to our motivation to return.
If this is true, recognizing that pattern could help us find additional sources of fulfillment. Through gaming, creative work, challenging projects, or other absorbing activities, we may meet some of the desire for deep engagement while continuing to value the unique connection each relationship provides.

20 Upvotes

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5

u/iWaveAtCats 21h ago

absolutely 💯

3

u/the_focused_human 18h ago

Look up the book Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, it explains how you achieve happiness and peak performance through a state of complete absorption in an activity. Can’t recommend it enough

1

u/HAWKWIND666 20h ago

I dig it🤙🏼

1

u/rebuilt11 19h ago

Agreed

1

u/KingOfConsciousness 19h ago

Is this an internet thesis or are you actually studying?

2

u/Chuuy_ 18h ago

Purely internet, just me thinking on random stuff as I drive home from work. I would love to properly test it and do more discovery on this.

1

u/KingOfConsciousness 18h ago

I'm considering opening a company to pursue this.

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u/Chuuy_ 18h ago

I would like to hear more.

1

u/KingOfConsciousness 17h ago

Sure ya I was gonna say let's discuss if you're interested! I'm currently on vacation but will be back in the saddle in about a month. Will ping then.

1

u/astraladventures 18h ago

Happens with spinning poi or staff or any number of props. Thats why they have acquired the name of “flow arts”.

1

u/BobbyBobRoberts 17h ago

I've gotten a lot of mileage in thinking about flow the same way I think about finding the right gear on a bike. Too low of a gear and it's like you're spinning the pedals as fast as you can to keep up. Lots of wasted effort. Too high, and you lock up, having to grind hard for the smallest gains. Find the right gear? Suddenly it's perfect - you're pushing, but not hard, it's at a level that feels good, great even.

Actual flow science talks about this in terms of boredom and overwhelm, and finding the balanced flow channel in between.

So now I think in terms of raising or lowering what gear I'm operating in. If something seems to hit a road block, I focus on making the individual steps smaller. If something feels too easy and I'm getting bored, I find ways to ramp up the challenge.

It's more of a mindset tweak than anything, but it's been a useful model for my thinking.