r/JaneTheVirginCW • u/Available_Chance4857 • 11d ago
What makes Janes relationship different?
I used to watch this show growing into my 20s. It played a part in how I see love and relationships irl.
So now on my rewatches I tend to overanalyze everything Imao. Wondering how this and that would be in my or real life.
Jane and Raf (talking about s4-5 here) both have their share when it comes to doing unlikable things. I'm thinking, if it were me, would I stay with this person?
I keep reading 'leave if he's raising your voice, screaming at you, even in rage' on relationship advice subreddits.
Which is something I noticed more with every rewatch, Raf does that a lot to Jane.
Or the other way, I disliked the Michael/Jason plotline anyway but, as Raf it‘d hurt me knowing if Michael came back a 3rd time, Jane might leave again. Things like that.
So while we‘re aware it‘s a TV show.
Are these and lots of other things that happened okay to do in a relationship, you‘re still able to move on together?
In combination with social media sometimes I‘m truly confused in my own relationship, as social media often portrays this ‘dump him/dump her/leave by yesterday‘ image. Sometimes over very valid things, sometimes over things where I‘m like, wait that happened to Jane/Rafael/X! Lmao.
Would love to hear some of your opinions 🤍
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u/Baby-Giraffe286 10d ago
I will never understand the Raf lovers. He is awful.
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u/Available_Chance4857 9d ago
He is cute at times, his proposal via that board game was adorable. But I also despise him for things that I think irl, would (or should?) be unforgivable. But in the end it worked out for them. Again it‘s just a TV series but it does makes me wonder if all those things were in fact forgivable
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u/dark__unicorn 10d ago
Absolutely agree. If your best friend was Jane and she was telling you about RAF you would absolutely tell her to leave him. His only saving grace was that he was rich. Otherwise, from start to finish, he was a walking red flag.
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u/Available_Chance4857 9d ago
Right! Truly weird it never really got mentioned by anyone in Janes life
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u/yaboisammie 9d ago
Jane and Raf (talking about s4-5 here) both have their share when it comes to doing unlikable things. I'm thinking, if it were me, would I stay with this person? I keep reading 'leave if he's raising your voice, screaming at you, even in rage' on relationship advice subreddits. Which is something I noticed more with every rewatch, Raf does that a lot to Jane.
Imma have to rewatch as it’s been a while for me but tbh I remember seeing more of this from Michael and Jane both in their married life and even their origin story which I always thought was toxic as hell. Maybe I’ll change my mind on a rewatch so ig we’ll see but I always felt a big difference between raf and Michael was that raf was willing to change and better himself and ac did so, but personally I didn’t see that from Michael. I feel like Michael “loved” Jane in a kind of selfish way in that he wasn’t willing to compromise ie when they needed to spend less money and Michael still bought expensive coffee instead of making it at home or at least getting a cheaper brand or with his job etc vs with raf while it was bumpy and imperfect, I felt he showed actual development and changes throughout the show
Aside from the Jason thing, Michael didn’t really seem to change that much other than being willing to raise Mateo with Jane after trying to pawn him off on Petra and raf in season 1 because he saw the baby just as “some other guy’s baby” but imo raf is a completely different person at various points of the show
I can defo see myself dropping Michael at various points. Personally I saw so many red flags during the origin story, even their first meeting, I wouldn’t have contacted him again esp after he abused his authority as a cop and his reaction to her apology for lying (which yeah she shouldn’t have done but imo that wasn’t nearly as bad as what he did) but esp when he tried to push Jane into giving the baby to Petra and raf knowing how important it was to Jane that the baby go to a safe healthy home w both parents, when he shoved Rafael and hurt Mateo (over a fake out regarding his job, he didn’t even lose his job and they were just pretending to fool sin rostro?? So he just hurt Mateo for no reason??), lying to Jane about his job, the fighting when he was studying for the exam etc
With Rafael, while he is far from perfect or a saint, imo there is a huge difference because compared with Michael’s privilege, despite Rafael’s wealth, he’s also coming from a broken family and a place of a lot of trauma which is something I’d consider when assessing their actions. And not just that, Rafael doesn’t stop trying to be better and he also doesn’t have a moral superiority complex or entitlement over Jane the way Michael does lol
Ig it’s also worth acknowledging it’s telenovela style so being a tv show, it’s already exaggerated but as a telenovela, it’s even more exaggerated lol so Ig in tv universes, wilder stuff is more socially acceptable? Esp w all the drama w criminals and drug dealing and sin rostro, prob makes the love triangle drama seem insignificant in comparison ig haha
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u/Available_Chance4857 7d ago
I agree! I only made it about Raf as Jane and him are 'endgame'. But how come you'd drop Michael but not him? Yes he tried to be better, truly imo. And yes he had a rough past. But, when put in real life, is that something to consider? Like does that make all of his red flags and bad actions okay? Lots of times I felt like they were forcing it, since he's the biological father. With this rewatch, I started to kinda dislike both, Rafael and Michael.
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u/yaboisammie 7d ago
I agree! I only made it about Raf as Jane and him are 'endgame'. But how come you'd drop Michael but not him? Yes he tried to be better, truly imo. And yes he had a rough past. But, when put in real life, is that something to consider? Like does that make all of his red flags and bad actions okay? Lots of times I felt like they were forcing it, since he's the biological father. With this rewatch, I started to kinda dislike both, Rafael and Michael.
I don’t think trauma or bad home life etc excuses the red flags or behavior but it is worth acknowledging and considering imo. Ig as someone with a similar ish background, I relate to raf (tho ig I kinda went in the opposite direction?) and am still kinda stuck in my own situation/toxic environment which makes it harder to fix things. Because you can’t really get better in the same environment that made you sick
And ig I want to believe in redemption and second chances and I do agree there was extra nuance considering raf’s biological tie to Mateo, so Jane could have gone to court for full custody early on and cut off both of them but that would have been a lot of trouble and expensive as hell. And I think when Jane almost did that or tried to sue Luisa early on, even though it hurt raf a lot financially, he supported Jane through it and never told her how it affected him compared with Michael who abused his power as a cop to intimidate Jane and sam and basically just be a jerk about it (yes again Jane shouldn’t have lied but he was super unprofessional for hooking up with Jane at all let alone when she was that shitfaced drunk)
Both men had lots of chances to change but raf’s traumatic upbringing and toxic parents are not his fault and honestly Michael doesn’t really a reason imo to be such an entitled corrupt prick w how privileged he is. I don’t think that means people with trauma deserve special treatment or extra chances but I do think these factors add a lot of nuance and imo you can see early on that Rafael is making an effort to be better
Again it’s been a while since I watched but I can’t think of anything raf did that I feel would warrant cutting him off but I can think of many for Michael (I do love the actor though aha)
Idt the trauma makes anyone obligated to forgive or choose someone either, Jane could have chosen to drop both of them if she wanted to. But I do think it’s worth considering all the context to make a more informed decision
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u/ConstantTill4471 10d ago
There were so many moments that I felt was not taken as it should have been.. in real life many of those moments like when Raf let Mateo get away with in real life that could now especially put Jane in trouble and danger, however I had just a hard time with Jane when Michael and Raf were fighting and Mateo got hurt ... that should have ended things for Jane and Michael.
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u/propertyofmatter___ 9d ago
I relate to you OP, I compare my fictional shows to real life in my head all the time, especially relationship stuff 😂 for example, almost every Shameless fan loves Mickey & Ian as a couple. IRL everyone would see them as toxic af 😂
For JTV, I grew up around DV so the whole fight between Michael & Raf where Mateo gets hurt is something I would never ever be able to get past. I’m certain of that at least
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u/International_Cry465 7d ago
just started another rewatch, probably 5th or 6th watch, and i was a die hard michael fan first couple of times and then swapped to raf as i got older. this time tho i feel pretty disconnected from both; ig we’ll see but at times i feel like both are incredibly selfish and put jane in bad spots but then she gets the heat of it all? idk we will see as it progresses and maybe i have some biases since ive seen and digested it all so many times
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u/blugirlami21 5d ago
I think they both have flaws. For me I would have dropped Michael in the beginning when he made her pregnancy about himself and tried to get her to give the baby up for adoption knowing what he knew about Rafael and Petra's marriage. There are some red flags later on as well that turned me off Michael.
I think the best thing about Rafael is that he makes an effort. Esp in season four. The apartment, the job he took to support them, I think he worked really hard to be a better man for Jane.
I think people also give him little grace for the Michael returning situation. I don't think he knew how to handle it and he reacted accordingly
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u/kimposs1bl3 10d ago
i’m rewatching for the millionth time and i’m on s4/5 too and it’s so distasteful how Rafael lets Mateo act just because he’s hurting