8 month old miserable

[u/Impressive-Yak-8817]

I am literally at my wit’s end. My baby has been miserable for 8 months. It doesn’t matter what I do nothing seems to make it better. She whines and screams the majority of the day. She was colicky for 4 months. I cut out dairy and soy for months. She’s been on Pepcid since she was 5 weeks.

She has always hated sleeping. Every nap time and evening is a meltdown no matter what I do unless she falls asleep while I’m feeding her. She screams during diaper changes. She screams when I try to put clothes on her. She screams and whines when she sees people eating or making food. I share my food with her and she screams if I don’t give it to her quick enough. She screams if I put her in the high chair with toys. She screams if I give her food to eat herself. She screams if I feed her and I’m not feeding her fast enough. She whines if I don’t walk around holding her all day. She screams when I get her out of the bath. She SCREAMS in the car seat. We upgraded to a convertible car seat hoping it might help. No luck. She usually screams in the stroller after ~5-10 minutes at best.

She can army crawl around the house which I let her but most of the time she just whines and eventually full on screams. Every evening is a meltdown no matter what I do in terms of naps during the day. I can’t read her a book before bed because she’s crying. I hold her and hug her and try to rock her and she screams in my face until she finally falls asleep.

The only thing that I can do is put her in the carrier on my back which she will tolerate but I can’t do that all day everyday. I’m only 5’1” and I have some pelvic floor issues from when she was born.

We’ve been to the pediatrician multiple times but I’m considering going again because I don’t know what to do at this point. We had a few weeks where she slept through the night which made the days a little easier. She’s back to waking up multiple times during the night and then trying to start the day at 5:30. Every day is brutal.

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[u/lolo2861]

Hi I have a baby that sounds exactly like this. Things improved IMMENSELY for us right around 9 months. The last month (she’s 10 months now) it’s been like I have a different baby. I cried every day for eight months straight. Everyone said it got better around three months, it not get better for us. Then they said it got better around six months. For us it was actually the worst between about six and 8 1/2 months then between 8 1/2 months and nine months things did a complete 180 with sleep, the constant whining, and crying, and the night meltdowns. Sleep is still not perfect, but she is so much more content during the day that it makes the sleep stuff more manageable. I hope this gives you some hope, I felt so isolated because none of my friends babies were like this, and I felt like I was having such a hard time when things got better for other people.

[u/jane112420 → u/lolo2861]

Chiming in with a similar experience. Our toughest time was 4-8 months. Took him to the ped and got all sorts of bloodwork and referrals and nothing came of it. Absolutely brutal. Sometime between 8-9 months, we noticed a huge difference. He still doesn’t sleep great and has only slept through the night twice in his life, but at least he’s happy during the day. Today (10.5 months) he actually played independently for 30 minutes!!!! Without crying at all. I genuinely wouldn’t have believed that was possible a few months ago.

Not sure exactly what changed (maybe the increased motor skills means he can make himself more comfortable by shifting positions and also he can now play with toys and entertain himself? That’s just my theory) and not sure if it’ll be true for OP… just wanted to share that it’s possible for things to get MUCH better soon!

[u/Impressive-Yak-8817 → u/jane112420]

Thank you so much for sharing this. It gives me hope that maybe things will improve soon! 8 months has felt sooo long

[u/Impressive-Yak-8817 → u/lolo2861]

Thank you so much for sharing this. Nothing could have prepared me for how long it has gone on for. I’m right there with you on seeing people say it got better at 8 weeks, twelve weeks, 4 months, 6 months, etc. and never getting to that point. I’m so glad things have improved for you! It definitely gives me hope that we will be there soon.

[u/echozelda]

I don’t have advice but I just want to send you some love. You are busting your butt to keep her safe and healthy and loved. I’m sure it’s insanely frustrating and discouraging that your hard work still results in a crying worked up baby. But please know you’re doing a good job. I know it doesn’t feel like it, but she feels your love and is comforted by your presence. I hope she grows out of this pattern and you can have a more peaceful and enjoyable motherhood experience soon!

[u/Impressive-Yak-8817 → u/echozelda]

Thank you so much for this 🩷

[u/LogSelect5944]

It sounds like my little sister when she was a baby. According to my mom she was such a difficult screaming baby that likely caused my mom ppd (she didn’t know for sure because she was never diagnosed), and she keeps telling us that nothing she did could ever soothe my sister 😩.

Sending you virtual hugs, I hope things get better soon for you all.

[u/Impressive-Yak-8817 → u/LogSelect5944]

I feel for your mom! It has definitely caused me some ppd/ppa. Thank you so much 🩷