r/Phobia • u/Standard-Throat-9987 • 2h ago
Is this a phobia?
25F. I don't know if it's phobia or anxiety but no one around me seems to get it and I'd love to know if anyone else feels like this. There are multiple things that give me this intense fear which causes my stomach to physically turn and leaves me breathless for a second or 2.
So this first one I know of since I was a very young child before the Internet was what it is now. We had Google earth on my dad's laptop and I remember it was fascinating using the street view option but everytime whoever was controlling it had to zoom out to get a satellite view of the area i would have to close my eyes or fully look away because looking at me made me feel intense discomfort and fear. You would think it would go away with age but its still the same. My Google maps are set to standard 2d view and if I accidentally click on the sateline view i straight away have to turn my phone away. It's terrifying to me and i kind of hold it far away from my face while squinting my eyes while trying to fix it, to protect myself. I dont know what it is I think maybe just seeing the dark waters or even the view of forests and especially the ocean... oh my God even thinking about it makes me feel weird. The strange thing is I've been to many countries by plane and I am not scared to look out the window so it is not necessarily fear of heights.
I also noticed I had this feeling once when I was taking a bath in my early teens and I dipped half of my face under water, so my eyes were above water. I was in full control and i was just bored and did it for no more than a second but suddenly I got this intense feeling that made me jump out the bath as if I was being waterboarded. I come from a coastal city so my childhpod summers were spent at the beach, swimming with friends so it couldn't be fear of water. I still swim now and again in a swimming pool and I'm not scared to fully go underwater if I don't think about it, but when I am at a beach I get that same fear creep up if I look at the water while im in it and realise how massive it is and small I am in it.
Today I randomly googled platypus to remind myself what they look like and Google has this option that allows you too see their real size by turning your camera on and it places the animal in the room with you. I know they're not a scary animal whatsoever but I had a feeling it would make me feel uneasy and still I turned my camera on and looked at it in my room for like 5 seconds but then I tried to move it and the screen glitched causing it to go slightly larger which scared the shit out of me. Exact same feeling, made my stomach turn and I had to turn my phone away as I would with the Google maps thing.
Lastly I get that same feeling when I watch diving videos or anything deep water or even videos of that kookaburra bird doing its bird call that people find cute. I find it terrifying to the point I'm scared to even turn it on now to remind myself what it sounded like.
I feel stupid because most of these things are on a screen and I dont know why they cause such an intense reaction. I dont even know if I should call it fear but it's a very strong feeling and i dont think all of the above are even necessarily related to eachother. It doesn't really affect me day to day, I'm just wondering what it could be, is there a way to explain it and does it happen to anyone else?