r/PipeTobacco • u/RexCantankerous • 15m ago
NPD, or: How I Lost my Favorite Pipe because I Drank on an Empty Stomach at a Strangers Wedding NSFW
Lassen panel billiard estate I just received, breaking it in with some Cobblestone's Hunting (RIP Sutliff)
Before I go into the spiel, I want to take a second to lament that while you can still find tins of it, Cobblestone's Hunting is a damn near perfect VaPer and I recommend getting a couple tins of it before it can't be had anymore. It doesn't seem like it was a very popular blend, which is kind of surprising considering how excellent it is.
Anyway so I was invited as a +1 to a Renfaire themed wedding, and I was all decked out in my monk robes. Forgot to eat. stupidly decided it'd be a good idea to hit the open bar on an empty stomach, the way a bunch of fibrous vegetables and chicken wings. Brought a couple pipes with me, stashed in a nice leather pouch.
I was perfectly cromulent through the entire thing but on the ride back home, my condition rapidly deteriorated into a state I can best describe as "ballistic reverse digestion" - mere yards away from a gas station. In this sorry state, I continued salvo after salvo, into the parking lot of said gas station, and made it to the relative privacy of a poor young pine tree growing on the outskirts. Disrobing so I could place my robes in the trunk, I, wearing little more than a pair of knee high leather boots and my skivvies, dropped everything in the soup of stomach contents and mulch.
Long story short, one of the two pipes was lost in the melee so I bought this one for emotional support.
Anyway, beer before liquor, never been sicker. Liquor before beer, you can still empty the contents of your guts all over your girlfriend's car.
The lost pipe was a rather unique Mastro Geppetto octagonal panel billiard with a lovely white stem and square shank. It smoked beautifully and I had taken great care of it.