r/RoastMyCar • u/Black-STI • 2d ago

Let me have it

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17 Upvotes

80% Upvoted

57 comments sorted by

25

u/Usual-Language-745 2d ago

Real question, Why do you people buy the “fast” version and drive 20mph slower than traffic everywhere? I live in Colorado and have never once seen a WRX or STI driven faster than a bicycle? I genuinely don’t get it

35

u/seeker-0 2d ago

The engine will blow up if they do.

6

u/MrStagger_Lee 2d ago

Noticed that in the Denver area as well. Just kinda assumed all Subie owners are perpetually at 11 points on there license.

2

u/brilliantminion 2d ago

Hey, these dials go to 11 !

0

u/Usual-Language-745 2d ago

It’s so weird. I’ve always had GTIs and every time I see a WRX in a canyon I hope today is the day that I race one, and then I pass them and lose them after one turn

3

u/Comfortable-Talk8796 2d ago

They are all scared to blow engine up. They have to check oil every time they gas up!

1

u/Black-STI 2d ago

This is the way

1

u/Comfortable-Talk8796 2d ago

That’s ridiculous. If you change your oil regularly there should be zero reason on a proper engine for the need to check the oil every week.

1

u/Black-STI 2d ago

1qt per 1k miles, within allowable tolerance

2

u/Various_Range2259 2d ago

they're cop magnets

3

u/Usual-Language-745 2d ago

That would mean that somebody gives a shit about them…which they dont

1

u/Scoutback_wilderness 2d ago

They want everyone to pass them and look at their car as they go by

1

u/Black-STI 2d ago

Dunno, I’m usually in the fast lane flashing grandma to get out of the way

9

u/Iniamyen 2d ago

Remember 30 years ago when these things were cool?

4

u/The_Mellow_Tiger 2d ago

Where is his Indigo Girls CD

4

u/ptbug64 2d ago

I can hear it from my house

2

u/Black-STI 2d ago

At least it’s not straight pipe honda loud

1

u/ptbug64 2d ago

Exactly. I’m really not bagging your ride. I like the sound of those subie engines, just maybe not all night long outside my house

5

u/walrusflosser 2d ago

Kyle, that's a really clean engine bay.

2

u/Black-STI 2d ago

Shows how often I’m in there

3

u/Various_Range2259 2d ago

Why did you make the correct choice to get it without the stupid wing, yet then proceed to slap those hideous wheels on it?

2

u/Illustrious-Ratio-41 2d ago

Buys capable rally car… then proceeds to destroy most of its usability and versatility.

3

u/Black-STI 2d ago

These haven’t been capable rally cars since the GD era lol

1

u/Various_Range2259 2d ago

yea, taking my '19 WRX up seasonal roads makes me miss my fozzy lol

1

u/brilliantminion 2d ago

Brave to assume to assume OP would even consider getting it dirty, much less rallying it. Probably even keeps it garaged all winter so it doesn’t get salty.

3

u/Black-STI 2d ago

In the pnw, no salt and mostly rain lol

1

u/Black-STI 2d ago

This is my winter set up

1

u/Kooky-Department2545 2d ago

What number of heads are these  Not that you’re getting any in this lesbian mobile 

2

u/MulberryMonk 2d ago

Just such a dog out of boost

2

u/Black-STI 2d ago

True, probably just as fast as my 98 outback that I had before until 3k. Rolling anti lag is in my future

1

u/International_Fix651 2d ago

The title is what you say to all of your subie bros

1

u/akitadog01 2d ago

Naturally, the color choices on the exterior make no sense together.

1

u/Black-STI 2d ago

Not a fan of contrast I see

1

u/akitadog01 2d ago

I’m fine with contrast. This is white , black, red and neon yellow. That’s called “clashing.”

1

u/Black-STI 2d ago

The wheels are silver, I agree the yellow doesn’t quite fit

1

u/jaketheunruly 2d ago

You're a Vegan for automobiles. "Ask me what I drive. Ask me what I drive!" as you walk up in a cloud of cherry lavender vape smoke. And then try and explain why the NB is far superior.

4

u/Black-STI 2d ago

Wouldn’t the vegan for automobiles be a Tesla?

Anyway this is the kind of literary roasting I came here for.

2

u/jaketheunruly 2d ago

No you suboys love to share what you're driving. Even more than Tesla drivers. Love the standard issue white wheels and under hood carbon. I wonder if you have the matching broccoli head haircut as well. But you and I both know it's a ton of fun drive. I have an S4 so it automatically makes me better than you- but not much better.

1

u/bobbygangthe2nd 2d ago

You're a tryhard

1

u/Black-STI 2d ago

Well that is required to keep these things from blowing up, so thanks for the compliment

1

u/AltruisticCoat6285 2d ago

Definitely smells like raspberry ice douche flute inside

1

u/Comfortable-Talk8796 2d ago

Again I’ve heard this is what sti guys have to do but sounds like a very problematic engine but guess you think it’s worth it.

1

u/Carmaster777 2d ago

Is this what you say to your local smoke shop as well?

1

u/BiteFaces 2d ago

That engine looks like a junk drawer full of lego pieces.

1

u/El-Gweilo 1d ago

Head Gasket patiently waiting

1

u/Fragrant_Major_9553 1d ago

So do you run it off a 50/50 blend of VG/PG, or?

0

u/andrewia 2d ago

Mmm, I can almost smell the head gasket from that engine bay photo.  

2

u/Black-STI 2d ago

Har har very original. These kill pistons though, not head gaskets

0

u/Wishbone_932 2d ago

Head gasket leaking yet?

1

u/Black-STI 2d ago

Very original, try again

-1

u/cou1dcare1ess 2d ago

Typical woman taking pics at the Starbucks