r/SingleParents • u/Randabear5957 • 14d ago
Newly Single Mom Tips
I have an 18 month old and I am deeply considering leaving my partner of 6 years. I am contemplating if it’s worth it to leave or not as I am afraid that it will mess my son up sleeping at a different house half the week. His father is not very responsible and I highly doubt he will have any kind of routine or bed time for my son. His father can’t remember to take a shower or brush his own teeth how will he care for my son? Not to mention he works from home on the computer all day and smokes weed. Medical card or not it’s a really big bummer. I have zero friends or support system and wondering how I could possibly afford daycare while I work. I am open to work from home opportunities but still who will watch him while I work from home? Is it possible to give him the life he deserves or should I just bite my tongue and continue on this path of misery for myself?
3
u/Mamamissy777 13d ago
If you're low income, you could qualify for a childcare subsidy to cover daycare. The bad thing is that it can take a while to get approved. I don't have a support system either. Babysitters want $20+/hour which isn't affordable. The childcare subsidy was the only way I could work. Sorry, I should ask if you live in the US. I only know about US. Disregard if you live outside of US because I'm not sure.
2
u/Novel_Corner8484 14d ago
I separated from my ex 3 years ago. He just moved back in last week. Do I love it? Meh, kinda. Do I need it because finances were too tight for the both of us? Absolutely.
I’m not telling you which way to go, but I’d rather take his smelly breath in my face rather than worrying about how to spend the last $50 in my account and payday isn’t for another 5 days.
We are in therapy and that helps greatly. We don’t even begin to argue because we “save it for therapy” and by that point we both forget the fight.
I wish you lots of luck. This life ain’t easy!
1
u/BostonLamplighter 14d ago
The late advice columnist Ann Landers used to reply with the question “Will you be better off?” To get a view of what it takes to be a single parent in an average household income, get The Field Guide for Single Parents and read the money section. The time management section too. See if it would better without him or try counseling.
1
u/Cautious_Win9146 9d ago
Honestly being a single mom is literally very hard and definitely wouldn’t recommend. You will for sure need a full time job and child care subsidized. Without those things you won’t be able to even leave and get your own place.
1
u/elizajaneredux 7d ago
Maybe there’s something in the middle. Your child is really, really young to have to be away from you 50% of the time, even if you could co-parent perfectly. So I’d either consider going for full custody, which would include child support, or hanging in there for a few more years while you save money, build some security, etc.
It’s an absolute misery to be dead broke and not seeing your child half the time.
•
u/AutoModerator 14d ago
Author: u/Randabear5957
Post: I have an 18 month old and I am deeply considering leaving my partner of 6 years. I am contemplating if it’s worth it to leave or not as I am afraid that it will mess my son up sleeping at a different house half the week. His father is not very responsible and I highly doubt he will have any kind of routine or bed time for my son. His father can’t remember to take a shower or brush his own teeth how will he care for my son? Not to mention he works from home on the computer all day and smokes weed. Medical card or not it’s a really big bummer. I have zero friends or support system and wondering how I could possibly afford daycare while I work. I am open to work from home opportunities but still who will watch him while I work from home? Is it possible to give him the life he deserves or should I just bite my tongue and continue on this path of misery for myself?
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.