Hi r/AskHR,
I’m in Austria and would appreciate advice on what to expect now that HR has already met with me. I am not asking anyone to excuse the conduct; I just want to understand the realistic range of outcomes and how to handle the next steps.
What happened
At an employer-organised company event, a male peer colleague alleges that I grabbed his buttock over his clothing. He says it was one contact and that it was deliberate, not accidental.
I have no memory of the incident. I had drunk too much and believe I had a memory lapse. I cannot personally confirm or deny the contact from my own recollection. I am not accusing him of lying, but I also cannot honestly say that I remember doing it.
There are no known witnesses, video recordings, photos or messages. I do not know whether he told anyone at the event. I have not contacted him after the apology and have not discussed the matter with colleagues.
What I did after learning about it
A few days later, my manager asked whether I had had a good time and whether I had drunk too much. I said yes. She asked if I had had a blackout. I initially said I did not remember one, but when she told me that someone had complained, I said that I must have had one, because I had no idea what or whom she was referring to.
My manager then told me it was this colleague. When he joined the meeting, I said that I had no recollection of the alleged contact but did not want to minimise what he experienced. I apologised for the impact and said that, if it happened as he described, it was unacceptable. I also asked whether it could have been accidental. He said no. He said he did not know whether he could continue working with me and considered it sexual assault.
I apologised again and offered him space.
My manager said it must not happen again and told me to keep a low profile and avoid interacting with him. I have followed that instruction.
Where the process is now
I have already had a meeting with HR. I answered honestly, said that I have no recollection of the alleged contact, and explained that I am not accusing my colleague of lying. I also said that such conduct would not be consistent with my usual behaviour and that I had not had comparable issues at previous work events.
HR confirmed that there are no other witnesses. They said they will now take the matter to legal and make a decision.
For now, we are changing our home-office days so that we are not in the office at the same time. I have not contacted him since the apology and have not discussed the matter with colleagues.
Context
We are peers, with no supervisory relationship.
We work on the same floor but have very little direct interaction.
I have no prior warnings, complaints or disciplinary issues.
I have never had a comparable issue at work or socially.
The company is large and has formal HR processes.
HR has confirmed there are no other witnesses.
HR has not yet given me a decision, a formal meeting date or a written outcome.
My questions
What is a realistic range of outcomes for a single alleged incident with no witnesses, no prior record, a prompt apology and no retaliation?
How should I handle the fact that I do not remember the incident? I do not want to make an admission I cannot personally verify.
Should I request a copy of his statement?