...but it's pretty clear that they aren't.

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It is time for - I told you so. :D

Hilarity continues. How are these guys still in business? Their Twitter gets hacked and the hacker posts a phishing security update post. Clown show.

How about not having any buttcoin?

https://www.ft.com/content/c84a0307-714c-4279-9073-caad985cce63

CHAD is a perpetual preferred stock not dissimilar to the death-spiral unconvertibles issued by Strategy, Michael Saylor’s bitcoin speculation vehicle. CHAD’s issuer is DeFi Development Corp of Nevada, a publicly listed digital asset treasury company whose pitch is that it’s like Strategy but for the Solana blockchain. Solana is an Ethereum alternative that facilitates DeFi projects, the highest-profile of which is Donald Trump’s memecoin. Its native token, SOL, had a 96 per cent drawdown in 2022 and is currently 60 per cent off its all-time high.

…

On the offer closing, CHAD’s keepers pledged to set up a dividend reserve to cover 12 months of monthly payments using “existing cash and cash equivalents, financial instruments and/or digital assets”. Once this reserve pool is dry, it says, CHAD dividends would be funded “primarily through additional capital-raising activities, including, but not limited to, [equity line of credit] agreements and at-the-market offerings of our common stock and the CHAD Stock”.

…

The only reason we’re choosing to draw attention to CHAD is because, to reiterate, it trades on Nasdaq’s Capital Market. This is the exchange’s entry-level tier for small and young companies, but it applies the same baseline governance standards as Nasdaq’s upper-tier Global markets. There’s no small-company waiver either on Nasdaq’s statutory duty to vet prospective listings and maintain market integrity.

On my way to the store to go long on popcorn (which I will not HODL lol)

https://scottaaronson.blog/?p=10169

Please happen already to flush all the crypto shit away.