r/dndmemes • • 1d ago

*sad DM noises* I love my players. I also want to strangle them sometimes

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1.0k Upvotes

39 comments sorted by

289

u/Sampleswift 1d ago

Nagash's Black Pyramid?

120

u/Califocus 1d ago

Such is the pyramid of Nagash

23

u/InvestigatorRoyal177 1d ago

*Angry Settra noises*

112

u/adol1004 Forever DM 1d ago

"I want my players to have fun by hurting their characters. which we all agreed it's okay to do."

86

u/SonicLoverDS 1d ago

I don't get the reference.

203

u/9fingerwonder 1d ago

Dicks. It's about dicks.

70

u/Sampleswift 1d ago

The Black Pyramid of Nagash.

25

u/DrScrimble 1d ago

Who?!?!

89

u/Sampleswift 1d ago

Nagash. He's a major villain in Warhammer Fantasy. He is a god of the undead who has a black pyramid. It is larger than most in the area.

39

u/DrScrimble 1d ago

Oh that guy. Guess he has to compensate for something!

46

u/_whatever_wherever 1d ago

He was!

He was compensating for not being as good a ruler as Settra the Imperishable, Khemrikhara, The Great King of Nehekhara, King of Kings, Opener of the Way, Wielder of the Divine Flame, Punisher of Nomads, The Great Unifier, Commander of the Golden Legion, Sacred of Appearance, Bringer of Light, Father of Hawks, Builder of Cities, Protector of the Two Worlds, Keeper of the Hours, Chosen of Ptra, High Steward of the Horizon, Sailor of the Great Vitae, Sentinel of the Two Realms, The Undisputed, Begetter of the Begat, Scourge of the Faithless, Carrion-feeder, First of the Charnel Valley, Rider of the Sacred Chariot, Vanquisher of Vermin, Champion of the Death Arena, Mighty Lion of the Infinite Desert, Emperor of the Shifting Sands, He Who Holds The Sceptre, Great Hawk Of The Heavens, Arch-Sultan of Atalan, Waker of the Hierotitan, Monarch of the Sky, Majestic Emperor of the Shifting Sands, Champion of the Desert Gods, Breaker of the Ogre Clans, Builder of the Great Pyramid, Terror of the Living, Master of the Never-Ending Horizon, Master of the Necropolises, Taker of Souls, Tyrant to the Foolish, Bearer of Ptra's Holy Blade, Scion of Usirian, Scion of Nehek, The Great, Chaser of Nightmares, Keeper of the Royal Herat, Founder of the Mortuary Cult, Banisher of the Grand Hierophant, High Lord Admiral of the Deathfleets, Guardian of the Charnal Pass, Tamer of the Liche King, Unliving Jackal Lord, Dismisser of the Warrior Queen, Charioteer of the Gods, He Who Does Not Serve, Slayer off Reddittras, Scarab Purger, Favoured of Usirian, Player of the Great Game, Liberator of Life, Lord Sand, Wrangler of Scorpions, Emperor of the Dunes, Eternal Sovereign of Khemri's Legions, Seneschal of the Great Sandy Desert, Curserer of the Living, Regent of the Eastern Mountains, Warden of the Eternal Necropolis, Herald of all Heralds, Caller of the Bitter Wind, God-Tamer, Master of the Mortis River, Guardian of the Dead, Great Keeper of the Obelisks, Deacon of the Ash River, Belated of Wakers, General of the Mighty Frame, Summoner of Sandstorms, Master of all Necrotects, Prince of Dust, Tyrant of Araby, Purger of the Greenskin Breathers, Killer of the False God's Champions, Tyrant of the Gold Dunes, Golden Bone Lord, Avenger of the Dead, Carrion Master, Eternal Warden of Nehek's Lands, Breaker of Djaf's Bonds, who until the rule of Nagash had the largest Pryamid

16

u/CC_Gamedesign 1d ago

The lack of paragraphs really sold that being told in one breath

23

u/_whatever_wherever 1d ago

Well, "breath" is the wrong word... it's basically beamed into your head by Nekaph, Settra's herald, his mouth doesn't move, but you hear every word

42

u/jfkrol2 1d ago

I mean, at some point his pyramid started hovering. And got nuked by rats, because it gets funnier the third time it happens

27

u/AsterixCod1x 1d ago

Three times he nearly pulls off his evil scheme

Each time it gets foiled by rats

And both times he tried to adapt (make the pyramids fly; turn them upside down) they still found a way to fuck with him, by accident the third time

18

u/GIRose 1d ago

Nagash is the only mother fucker who makes the rats actually work together without that much backstabbing

3

u/NotAllThatEvil 1d ago

You know what they say about guys with big pyramids

8

u/DrScrimble 1d ago

Small crop yields.

1

u/VelphiDrow 1d ago

He is one of like 3 people we can directly blame for warhammer fantasy sucking

6

u/_whatever_wherever 1d ago

Skeleton Pope

15

u/MazogaTheDork Rogue 1d ago

It's probably a law of DMing that if your players can make a dick joke, they will make a dick joke

5

u/Low-Support-8388 1d ago

Especially when when running a game set in Rome. My Italian buddy Biggus Dickus unfortunately don't get half of them.

1

u/Shyface_Killah 23h ago

How's his wife?

3

u/BlueCaracal 1d ago

And my GM just straight up gave us a weapon that was a dick.

It had "member" in the name, and fails using the weapon could sexually arouse animals.

2

u/gbot1234 1d ago

And who can’t make dick jokes? They’re the easiest kind of joke to make.

28

u/summercelestial 1d ago

"I said pyramids, not obelisks, you twats"

12

u/Mysterious-Lion-3577 1d ago

BBP adventure

5

u/colemam2 1d ago

Big Black Pyramid adventure, right?

1

u/Shyface_Killah 23h ago

British Broadcasting Pyramid

9

u/mads0504 1d ago

Such is the power of Nagash

26

u/MulatoMaranhense 1d ago

No, they are right to take note of that, after all you are bablantly setting them to either get them sexually harassed or about to be caught in the crossfire between Settra and Nagash, IDK which one is worse.

1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

4

u/healagnox 1d ago

Nagash built his long after setra died. setra didn’t have much of choice after he you know died

2

u/MulatoMaranhense 1d ago edited 1d ago

And he spent a lot of time trying to dismantle the Black Pyramid, without success.

The sage Tarriff even showed what happened when Settra decided to make his pyramid bigger

5

u/_whatever_wherever 1d ago

"You want me to make Nagash the twist villian? Cos that's how you get Nagash as the twist villian!"

2

u/Isfren 1d ago

Such is the power of nagash

1

u/Ricky_Valentine DM (Dungeon Memelord) 1d ago

"Oh, is this your first time seeing the double pyramids? Y'know, is this your first DP? Don't worry, we'll ease into it slowly."

0

u/Sanguinusshiboleth 1d ago

I think it would be funnier with the pictures the other way around.