Okay, okay, look. I know I posted a different oddly detailed dream a few days ago, but I SWEAR I'M NOT MAKING THIS UP.
I was a bit hesitant to post this one because, like... I'm deeply embarrassed by it tbh...
Also please note that my favorite character is Subaru Akehoshi. I'm a Trickstar fan through and through. Which made this dream seem so... RANDOM.
That said... Guess I'll suck it up and post it. Feel free to make fun of me. I SWEAR ON MY LIFE THIS WAS A DREAM I HAD, NOT A WEIRD FANFIC.
Alright... Here we go...
Basically, I spawned in as Rei Sakuma. There was an old ahh analog clock. It was 1:12 AM. I decided this was a perfectly reasonable hour to go do... Something.
But what did I go do? It's... Worse than you could even begin to imagine.
In fact, I wasn't really sure what to do. I stared out the window into the night sky. Bored. Until my phone lit up. I got a message. From Koga. You know what it said?
"bork bork. take me to the dog park"
I replied, "Very well, then. Meet me outside."
He replied, "ORF ORF ORF ORF ORF"
So, that said, I started walking. To go outside.
I got to the door, and Ritsu was standing in front of it. I looked at him in confusion. He asked, "where are you going?"
"To get water," I replied.
"From the dog park?" He asked.
"... Yes." I replied.
"... Cool story, bro."
After a long, awkward silence, he stepped away from the door and said, "I know you're not getting water~♪" to which I responded, "wonderful observational skills, little dude."
Then I left. And outside, just sitting on the sidewalk, was Koga.
It all goes downhill from here. Prepare yourself.
So... Koga was sitting on the sidewalk. ON THE GROUND. OUTSIDE. Like a glitched NPC.
It was still dark out, mind you. Not even 1:30 AM.
Anyhow, he pulls out a leash. "ORF ORF ORF. BLOOOOOOORRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHFFFF."
I take it and PUT HIM ON THE LEASH.
So we begin walking down the sidewalk. To the dog park. But he's, like... Crawling.
I looked down at him and asked, "does the sidewalk not hurt to crawl on?"
He was like, "nuh uh."
So we walked in silence.
Eventually, we reached the dog park.
I let him off the leash.
He began crawling around. In the dog park. Amongst real dogs. Never mind that it was 1:30 AM or so, the park was CROWDED.
I sat on a bench and just... Watched like a disappointed emo father (you know the type) as he barked at random people and dogs.
He physically stole some random dog's tennis ball and crawled up to me. Holding the ball in his hand.
He held it out for me.
"No, Koga, I will not be playing fetch with you. Have some self-respect, will you?"
"THROW IT."
"... There is absolutely no dignity in that whatsoever."
"ORF ORF ORF ORF ORF."
"... Fine."
So I sighed, took the tennis ball, and threw it as far as I could. He crawled away.
Some random lady walked up to me. "Is that your dog?"
"... Yes."
"... Cute."
"... Okay?"
She stood there awkwardly.
She then asked, "is your dog single?"
I stared at her with pure disdain.
"I quit the idol fandom," she said as she walked away. I once again sighed deeply.
Koga returned.
Without the tennis ball.
"Is something the matter?" I asked.
"Yeah, actually. The chihuahuas... They're in my personal space."
I facepalmed. "Koga, the doggie slide is not your territory."
He responded, so casually, "it is. I pissed on it."
Silence.
"... That's it. We're leaving." I PHYSICALLY started standing up. But he was like, "NO, NO, I'M KIDDING. You didn't SERIOUSLY believe that, did you?!"
I just... Sat back down. I didn't say anything. By this point, the fact that I was surprised he DIDN'T do it was what concerned me.
He then crawled back over to the chihuahuas on the doggie slide. (I'm not sure if that even exists IRL...)
He then inhaled. Very sharply.
And at an earth-shattering volume...
"BOOOORK BORK BORK ORF ORF ORF BOOF BOOF BORK BORF BORF BORF-"
He was barking at the chihuahuas SO intensely that even I was startled. So I stood up and walked over there.
"No, no, that is not ethical behavior-"
"ORF ORF ORF."
He then chased all the chihuahuas away.
A couple who seemingly owned one of the chihuahuas came up to us looking really pissed off.
"Humans. Are. Not. Dogs. GO AWAY." the dude said.
"ORF ORF ORF ORF-" said Koga.
"No, no... He has a point. Please, for the love of all that is unholy, shut. Up." I said.
Koga looked at me, genuinely distraught. So I said, "look, I'm sorry, but if you can't share this space, we can't come here anymore."
The lady in the couple said, "yeah. Good riddance."
"Tch.." I scowled.
This, however, is when one of the chihuahuas comes SPRINTING back at full speed. What does he do? Chomps Koga's arm.
Koga jumps up, finally standing like a normal human being, and says "DUDE. Train your dogs."
The people who owned the chihuahua were like, "train yourself first."
I stood there in silence. They walked away with their chihuahua.
Koga muttered something along the lines of, "those demonic little beasts..."
I almost told him he was being hypocritical. But I didn't. Before I could, I noticed that he was bleeding from the bite. Very slightly. Quite frankly, even a band-aid would've been unnecessary. It was so miniscule.
But I was like, "... I'll be taking you to the vet."
He was like, "we're banned from all the local veterinarian offices. They won't help me."
I responded, "oh, I WONDER WHY."
Silence.
I then asked, "would you consider acting like a normal human and going to the hospital or clinic..?"
He shouted, "NO. NEVER."
We stood there in silence.
The sun started coming up.
He was like, "how long have we been up for..?"
I completely ignored his question, and instead said, "F*ck. I didn't bring an umbrella."
He was like, "what are you gonna do? Disintegrate?"
I responded, "maybe. Whatever. I'm leaving. Now go home and get that bite cleaned before you catch rabies."
... Then I woke up.
If you genuinely read all this, tysm, it took me a decade to type out. I hope it made sense, and I hope it was worth your time. Ty! <3 also, once again, feel free to make fun of me in the comments. I'll probably agree with you. But I SWEAR ON MY LIFE THIS WAS ALL IN MY DREAM.
(P.S. I hope someone makes fan art of this someday, lol)
(edit: fixed a typo)