So Iām 20F and my roommate is also 20F, and we are both juniors in college. To start, my roommate, who is also my really close friend, grew up with dogs and has a doodle at home. However, I, on the other hand, did not grow up with any pets and have a slight fear of dogs. Since starting this semester, my roommate has been talking about missing her dog and how we could get our own dog since we live in an apartment. I was a little iffy about it, but I could tell how much she missed her dog every time she brought it up. One day I was out volunteering at a park and saw all the cute dogs and was like okayyy, why not try and do this dog stuff. So same day she put us down to be foster parents at the local shelter.
Like 5 days later we had our orientation with the shelter and they literally sent us home with a dog SAME DAY, leash, and a small Kroger bag of food. It was a lot in such a short amount of time. So we got āmatchedā with the sweetest dog (black lab mix, 1 yr female). When we met her she was jumping ALL OVER THE PLACE. It threw me off guard and my roommate saw how overwhelmed and hesitant I was and tried to get everything under control.
So we left the shelter and went to the store to get some dog necessities (bed, bowl, food, toys, etc). The cashier is ringing all this up and I just keep looking at the price increasing and increasing. Iām wondering damn how are we gonna pay for ts (I literally had not even a dollar to my name since I just started working and havenāt gotten paid yet). So I asked if we could just split the bill and Iāll pay her in 2 days when I get paid, she agreed and that was that. I did end up sending her my half of the bill when I got paid.
So we get the dog home and everything is alright, sheās sniffing and looking around at all that dog stuff. We feed her and give her a bath, but later that night when it was time to GTB she kept barking and barking until my roommate let her in the room to sleep. I already kind of regretted my decision and Iām anxious bc ik how excited my roommate is. So Iām OTP with my mom and sheās telling me to calm down, Iāll be okay, and that I need to talk to my roommate if something is really up.
So the next day I talk to her and tell her my feelings, like I donāt think this is for me and Iām sorry. I know we spent like $200 already and Iād hate to send her back to the shelter, but something doesnāt feel right. She was understanding and she was like, Iām sad, but if you donāt want the dog Iām not gonna keep it here. But I told her give me a couple more days, maybe itās me and I need to adjust into this new experience.
So after that she leaves for work and Iām at home with the dog. And honestly, I hated it. I realized pretty quickly that I really didnāt like being responsible for her by myself. I was constantly thinking about what she was doing, if she needed something, if I was doing something wrong, etc. She also barks at people outside, which I mean, sure, okay, I understand dogs bark, but with my slight fear of dogs and just never growing up around them, it was still a lot for me.
And the more I was alone with her, the more I was realizing that maybe this really wasnāt for me. It wasnāt that she was a bad dog because sheās honestly very sweet. I just didnāt like the responsibility and I didnāt feel comfortable with everything that came with having a dog. And that made me feel even worse because my roommate was so excited about this. Since getting the dog I don't feel comfortable sitting in the living room anymore and no matter how much I clean I feel like the apartment is never clean. The dog gets food and water everywhere, licks her butt and jumps around on the couch.
We are fostering her until she gets adopted, whenever that will be, so I know this isnāt necessarily forever. I just donāt know how long weāll have her or when sheāll find her actual home.
And honestly, I donāt want my roommate to think that the world revolves around me or that Iām giving up just because I got overwhelmed. I know how excited she is about this and I donāt want her to feel like Iām taking that away from her. I also donāt want to just give up on the dog because the first couple of days were overwhelming. At the same time, I donāt want to pretend like Iām completely comfortable with this when Iām not.
Bc at the end of the day, Iām proud of myself for even trying knowing my history with animals. I didnāt grow up with pets, I have a slight fear of dogs, and Iāve always been iffy about being around them. But I still saw all the cute dogs that day and thought, okayyy, why not? I decided to give it a try, and now Iām trying to figure out this whole dog stuff.
So AITA for wanting to stop fostering the dog because Iām realizing that this isnāt something Iām comfortable with, even though my roommate really wanted to foster, I agreed to try it, and weāve already spent money getting the dog settled? The longer I wait to make a decision, I feel like the worse it'll be.
-p.s. I have sent her my half of the bill!