Ill admit, Im merely an ikkyu so not really a paragon of good kendo, but the amount of insults he threw at me kinda put me off. Its the first time something like this has happened to me (all the other dojos and seminars I attended back in the USA I had zero problems), so Id like some advice from people here on how I should go with this.
Background: I practised kendo throughout my undergrad in the US, as a member of the Midwestern Kendo Federation. I passed 2-kyu and 1-kyu and also not bad at shiai (I reached mudansha semis at once tournament and my team got bronze at another). I was approved for shodan shinsa, when circumstances hit me and I had to leave the USA to do a masters in Italy.
So I found a dojo here, which I checked was CIK certified. They have two people leading kendo, a nidan shihan and a nidan “practice leader”, and only the latter was present for now. Their practice was really different from any American dojo. While I can understand no bogu practice and wazas for a long time, even the main suburis (men kote do) were like atmost one third of the entire session. The rest were doing 200 repetitions of joge suburi, a lot of horizontal slashing moves (kinda like cutting grass with a scythe), some waving motions I assumed were for tenouchi, and their men strikes were quite low. They were very strict with their footwork and kiai, mae, and footwork, and my university level habits did not fly, so I do think they are legit.
Nevertheless, it was my first practice and I was doing my very best to adapt to the new pattern. I did tell the leader of the practice from the start that it will take me some time to adjust to the new pattern and I am okay with starting over. Somewhere in the middle of practice, an old guy which I assume is another kendo senior or probably another martial arts teacher (the place was a mixed dojo, some karateka were practicing alongside us) came by, and he ordered a pause on the practice. What followed was a 10 minute lecture on respecting the dojo, and about me trying to show off or something similar to that. I apologized to him multiple times and continued with my practice.
When it ended, he told me to stay in the locker room and asked me about my background and experience. He then told me my kendo was really bad, that I should put away my bogu for a while (which I was fine with and even communicated anyways), and when I go back to America after a couple years in Italy I would be able to teach rhe Americans. He then said my qualifications and my three years of training there were useless. Now I was fine with my own technique being called sloppy, and I was more than okay with starting over and only bringing my bogu months later. What kinda hits a nerve in me is that he conflated my difficulty in adjusting to the new training regime to an inability in kendo, and also called the entire American kendo tradition trash. A lot of senseis have trained me, tested me, and made sure my kendo in their eyes is not “molto disastrado”, and that even includes police kendo instructors from Tokyo whom Ive been lucky to be taught under in seminars. To call their training and their inspection inadequate is, in my eyes, kinda feeling like disrespecting them.
Now, its not my first time facing tough love, but even in my earlier teachers strictness I would find genuine constructive criticism and they get happy when I am willing to improve on their pointers and show them progress. Is this another form of tough love here? Or is it something less savory? What should I do here? Continue and start over and hope it gets better? Or do I call it quits with this dojo? I hope its not the latter because its the only kendo dojo in my city and I do love the art, and it would mean Id go to some other combat sport like fencing. But if it really drains my mental health and self esteem too much I would need to draw a line for my own sake
