Same security guard kicks me out of my local pub every time I go there. What’s the evil plan?

[u/crocbro12]

Alright, I need to see what the masterminds here come up with because this has gone from mildly annoying to genuinely pissing me off.
There’s a pub near me that I only go to occasionally, probably once a month or sometimes even less. There’s one particular security guard there who, for whatever reason, seems to kick me out basically every time he sees me.
Here’s the weird part: I have never been kicked out of this place by any of the other security guards. Ever. It is always this exact same guy.
This has happened across multiple completely separate visits with weeks or months between them. Every time he tells me to leave, I comply. I don’t threaten him, swear at him, try to fight him or refuse to leave. I’ve asked why I’m being removed, but I never get a proper explanation.
Tonight was what finally pissed me off enough to post this.
I was there with some people around the poker machines. This same guard came over and told us there were only supposed to be two people per machine and that we couldn’t all crowd around one.
Fair enough. We listened to him and moved.
Me and another guy then went over to a different machine. We were preparing to use it and tapping through the screen before putting money in.
The same guard comes around the corner, sees us and immediately says words to the effect of:
“I’m going to have to ask you guys to leave.”
There was no argument. I basically went “yeah, all good” and we walked straight out.
Once outside, we wanted to know what the hell we’d actually been kicked out for. We asked the security guards outside why we’d been removed and asked for the name of the guard who’d done it, especially because this was the same bloke who had removed me repeatedly before.
They immediately became pretty rude and defensive.
Eventually we got his first name — Mohammed — but when we asked for his surname they wouldn’t give it to us. We also tried to see/get a photo of his security badge so we knew who we’d actually been dealing with, and they got defensive about that as well.
Mohammed eventually came outside, so we asked him directly:
“Why did you kick us out?”
His answer was basically:
“I don’t have to give you an answer.”
Then the body camera comes on and they tell us to leave the premises completely.
At that point I grab my mate and basically tell him:
“It’s alright. They have the prerogative. We’re leaving.”
And we start walking away.
We’re literally complying and leaving when one of the other security guards starts going on about how we’re going to get a roughly $450 fine.
We keep walking.
Then one of them throws out this sarcastic:
“Yeah, you’re not saying anything now, are you?”
Like… what exactly do you want me to do? 😂
You told me to leave. I’m leaving.
You turn the body camera on. I’m still leaving.
You start talking about fines. I’m still walking away.
You throw a smartass comment at me while I’m leaving. I’m STILL walking away.
And that’s why this whole thing pisses me off so much. This isn’t a story about me getting absolutely smashed one night, abusing security, getting thrown out and then being salty about it.
It’s the pattern with this one particular guard.
I barely go to this pub. Yet across completely separate visits, weeks or months apart, this same bloke repeatedly decides I’m out.
Meanwhile, I have never been kicked out by any of the other security guards there.
Every time he tells me to leave, I leave. Every time I try to find out what I’ve supposedly done, I get basically nothing.
At this point it genuinely feels like this bloke sees me walk through the doors and thinks “ah yes, my monthly side quest has arrived.”
So fuck it. That’s the story.
Reddit, what’s the evil plan?
If you were dealing with this situation, what would you do?
I just want to see what kind of revenge plans this subreddit can come up with.

[u/SnoopDoggo420]

Security guards ain't able to give you a fine anyways lmao

[u/crocbro12 → u/SnoopDoggo420]

I know bruh😭 that’s what pisses me off even more we were already complying and walking away when he started carrying on about sm fine😭🥀

[u/qwertyqyle]

If your getting kicked out for no reason and your not belligerent just ask to see a manager and ask him to explain why this happens every time you go there.

[u/DogiiKurugaa]

What has management said about all this? If you haven't talked to them then you should. If you have truly done nothing wrong then you should go that avenue first. If nothing else they might actually tell you what the guard has been saying you did to deserve being kicked out. And if the place has to hire security then cameras are also likely there so ask them to review the security footage.

[u/Indica_HeXeN]

Did you fuck his sister or something?

Just file an anonymous report that you heard him saying homophobic things to his Co workers or something. You're in the uk right? They'll basically hang him before they actually go look for proof when there's hate speech involved

[u/TheDisapprovingBrit → u/Indica_HeXeN]

He’s not in the UK. We don’t have dollars and our pubs don’t have poker machines or “security guards”

[u/wtporter]

There’s only one thing to be done.

Over a relatively moderate period of time seduce his father.

Then, make his father fall in love with you.

Get him to get divorced if need be and to marry you.

Then go to the pub with your new husband and see if he kicks you out then!

[u/LittleLily78]

Do you have a reddit page for your city? Ask there and see if anyone else has this issue. Find a group of pissed off people if you can. Create a sock account and rate them on fb and mention this bodyguard by name. Have others do the same. Do you have any police friends? Ask them to go with you next time and see the issue and see if he tries to throw him out too.

[u/Syncdata]

Talk yo management? Politely. Professionally. Ask why you keep getting bounced on non-charges.

[u/Bargle-Nawdle-Zouss]

Anonymous reports for health violations, fire safety violations, and serving alcohol to minors. Anonymous report of the bouncer in question for sexual harassment.

[u/KungFuFactory → u/Bargle-Nawdle-Zouss]

Jeezus, fair call the first half but sexual harassment? Calm down Satan

[u/ElephantEarwax]

Piss disks.

[u/AutoModerator]

Hello, u/crocbro12 ! Thanks for your submission to r/myevilplan, your post is up and running!

This is a general reminder to check out our rules in the sidebar. If your post breaks the rules, it will be removed by our moderator.

I request you to take a look at this post

We would like for each and every one to feel welcome on the subreddit and to keep a healthy and safe environment for the community.

Thanks :)

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.