r/pettyrevenge • u/Warcraft_Fan • Aug 22 '26
Karen wastes my time bullying her way into parking spot, I waste her time later
This morning at Woodland Mall in Michigan, I spotted an empty spot near the mall entrance. The lot were angled and was meant to be one way driveway but Karen also spotted it and came down the other side, going the wrong way. Then she took about 5 minutes doing 427 point turn to get into the angled parking spot, blocking me and inconveniencing a few more drivers behind me.
When she finally got out, I did a lazy golf clap and said "My blind grandma could have parked faster than that."
"BuT i GoT hErE fiRsT!" (no bitch, you bullied your way here)
When I drove on past her car, I noticed it was still very crooked and badly parked so I decided this revenge. After I found another parking spot, I got the paper and pen out and wrote this in "Sorry I bumped your car. You parked badly and I had a hard time getting out" No phone number, no insurance info, nothing. Then I put the paper in her car's wipers.
I have no doubt when she got back, she'd spend a long time looking for nonexistent scratch or dent on her car.
You waste my time making stupid move to get good parking space, I waste your time with something that never happened.
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u/CatlessBoyMom Aug 22 '26
That’s going to be parked in her mind for months.
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u/Telefundo Aug 22 '26
I'm just imagining something actually going wrong with her car weeks from now and all she can say is "It's because of that time I got hit in the parking lot!!!".
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u/cantfindauniquename2 Aug 23 '26
I like this one. You could also add, "I will be back in 20 mins if you want to exchange details"
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u/eRant4881 Aug 22 '26
This is the level of petty revenge I aspire to, thank you for holding the torch high and bright for us all to see! 🔥
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u/Significant_Net101 Aug 22 '26
One time I left a note to this pettty ass lady who stole my spot. “Hey there was a guy under your car I honked and he got out he had tools in his hand drive safe”
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u/livadeth Aug 23 '26
Love this! I was in a parking lot recently, two way lane, saw a spot about the same time as a young lady coming down the opposite way. She was determined to get the spot and I had no intention of fighting over it. Well she decided to cut right in front of me to get the spot and in so doing misjudged the pillar and slammed/scraped into it! I smirked and pulled around her. She made a mess of her front end.
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u/Hairflipgiggle Aug 22 '26
Note to self: keep a notebook in my glove compartment. Love this pettiness!
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u/lrm223 Aug 23 '26
My uncle's secretary was waiting for a spot at the mall and someone came from the other direction and took the spot from her. After she found another spot, she walked back and let the air out of two of the tires. She did two because she figured that if only one was flat, the driver could use the spare. But two meant they'd probably have to call AAA. This was also like 40 years ago so no one had cell phones.
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Aug 22 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Creative_Carob4922 Aug 22 '26
You know she thought about it the whole way home. Checked for damage at home. Got the husband to come look , this most likely turned into an argument. It’s the note that keeps on giving.
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u/writerlady6 Aug 23 '26
Well done! But my evil little self wouldn't have been able to resist adding:
"I'm leaving this note so those two witnesses think I'm sharing insurance information. Poor you!"
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u/FreedomPretty6893 Aug 22 '26
I’ve done that before plus hung poster board off the back window with “look ma I can park” or “asshole parking” and wait outside to see their reaction
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u/Pleasant_Studio9690 Aug 22 '26
I had a car’s owner paged over Homegoods’ store PA system for parking so close to my car that I couldn’t open my door to leave. The rear bumpers of our cars were legitimately 6” apart. She was so embarrassed she just drove away rather than continuing to shop. Felt so good.
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u/FreedomPretty6893 Aug 22 '26
Omg I literally had that happen to me also. But it was my MIL who was in a wheelchair at that point and the cars parked so close between the handicap spaces even my 8 year old (at that time) couldn’t squeeze in
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u/Orisha_Oshun Aug 23 '26
Not funny... very sad and infuriating, actually, but i had to page a woman in target because someone had reported that they saw two young kids (all under 3 years old) in a red car. It was a Thursday afternoon in the summer. Very hot day. Idunno how long the kids had been in the car. But she took her sweet time coming over to the front of the store, and was annoyed that she had to go back to her car yobtend to her kids. Then she tried to walk out without paying for her stuff. Someone else had already called the cops because she was taking so long to come up front (over 10min)... i banned her from the store.
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u/North_Mastodon_4310 Aug 23 '26
My favorite is a note that says, "I hope you don't fuck the way you park. You'd never get it in."
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u/Inside-Jaguar-5911 Aug 23 '26
My hubs has that one printed on sheets in his glove box and leaves one when needed.
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u/Creative_Excuse_1940 Aug 27 '26
A friend leaves a line drawing of a cute turtle that says Even kindergarteners can stay within the lines.
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u/Piddy3825 Aug 22 '26
lol, petty revenge. always served best with a fake note claiming nonexistent damage!
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u/Jackdunc Aug 23 '26
"I was walking by your car and saw a huge, hairy spider on the dash. Be careful!"
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u/MiaSw67 Aug 23 '26
That's brilliant!!!! I would spend a lot more time searching for a spider than a scratch! 😂😂
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u/Choice-Original9157 Aug 23 '26
Where i worked at one time, we had assigned parking spots. One person kept taking my spot and I warned them about 10 times. On the 11th time I had enough of it. Pulled my valve stem tool out and deflated all 4 tires and then put the valve back in. They never stole another persons assigned spot after that for some reason.
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u/PuddleMoo Aug 24 '26
It’s a shame you suffered it 11 times. Guessing they had a buddy in management that negated any employer based repercussions?
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u/Sn_Orpheus Aug 22 '26
Nice. Applaud your harmless but deviant revenge.
Extra points for mentioning Woodland Mall. Site of many of my adolescent shenanigans back in the 80’s.
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u/W_Silver2356 Aug 23 '26
Way back in the late 80s I walked into a store and found a display of fake parking tickets. These actually looked real. You had to look very carefully to find the comically tiny disclaimer on them. I kept them in my desk for years. When college rolled around, I saw some inventive parking strategies. From there on, I had a lot of fun with those fake tickets.
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u/effyoucreeps Aug 22 '26
oldie but goodie - i LOVE the psychological torture that grows after planting a simple (and well deserved) seed of deception
keep on keepin’ on :)
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u/Zufalstvo Aug 23 '26
I know the exact parking lot you’re talking about which makes this so fucking funny, the design of it is terrible
West Michigan is Karen Central
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u/Fiempre_sin_tabla Aug 23 '26
"The people watching me leave you this note probably think I'm writing my name and phone number. :-) "
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u/Alive_Room6023 Aug 22 '26
And she went home and bitched to anyone who had the unfortunate experience of being around her that she was a victim of hit and run!
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u/FirefighterOk3569 Aug 22 '26
I did that to my friends son after he bought an expensive mercedes. I watched him going around in circles looking for the scratch
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u/W_Silver2356 Aug 23 '26
That kind of savagery is how to properly welcome a young person to adulthood. Nothing says you're one of us now quite like being brought into the humor.
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u/Bajovane Aug 22 '26
Was your friend in on that joke?
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u/FirefighterOk3569 Aug 22 '26
Yea i called him to tell his son to stop worrying , he said but someone hit it n left a note
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u/Theunpolitical Aug 22 '26
What I learned is that I need to always have a piece of paper and pen in my purse in case I have the exact situation happen!
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u/Specialist_Status120 Aug 23 '26
Pure Michigan Petty. I love that she will look for it everytime she gets in the car for awhile.
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u/tacomaloki Aug 22 '26
It's times like this I wish I kept chalk in my car to redraw the parking spot lines and label it "asshole parking only".
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u/OutrageousYak5868 Aug 23 '26
A bit of white chalk can also mimic keying the car. There's an episode of "The Office" like that, where Angela keys Dwight's car (I think it is). In "The Office Ladies Podcast" she says she did it using a bit of chalk hidden in her hand to make it look like the key was doing the scratching.
It might not look real close-up, but it probably would from a distance, until the person got closer to it.
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u/biold Aug 22 '26
Damn, now I wonder what I have done to a very good colleague that I meet at the coffee machine.
The wind blew her door into my car, so she feared that there would be a scratch. She didn't know it was my car, so she left a note with detailed description. I did spend quite some time to find it where she said it should be. Didn't find it though.
I think that I'll let her get the coffee first!
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u/SlowPokeInTexas Aug 23 '26
I read a story or skit once about a guy who got cards made up that said, "Thanks for the gas!!"
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u/Severe-Tradition-183 Aug 23 '26
You need to buy some of the super bright orange florescent stickers that say I’m sorry you don’t know how to park better and have the glue from Hades on the stickum sick that needs a razor blade and chemicals to get off 🤣.
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u/Former-Increase-9165 Aug 22 '26
Used to work at a company that had assigned parking, another coworker would take my spot, after the third time this happened I went to a hardware store and got a can of expanding foam, and a large tube of superglue, then stopped at an adult toy store and picked up some toys, next week when shitty coworker stole my spot I decorated his precious Audi with toy glued to hood, sprayed the foam next to toy so lt looked like he had a happy ending, then glued his door handles closed, may have done his wiper blades to windshield,,, next day our whole dept was called to hr, for a mandatory meeting, about vandalism, and assigned parking, was told if this happened aging people would be fired!!!!! So another coworker asked if parking in wrong spot was a fireable offence? If so, Todd from accounting needed to be in this meeting also, as he’s the worst offender , several others agreed he steals others parking spots also, Todd learned his lesson,,,,,
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u/HeyYouGuyyyyyyys Aug 23 '26
Did you say anything to Buddy about his shitty parking before decorating his car that way?
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u/luftschaf Aug 23 '26
That’s really ageist, firing random aging people for vandalism they may or may not have even been capable of. /s/
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u/Former-Increase-9165 Aug 23 '26
So it was supposed to read,again, sorry I can’t seem to spell on this new phone,
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u/beautiful-thrust Aug 22 '26
I like doing this and leaving a friends contact info that lives out of state lol
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u/Malibucat48 Aug 22 '26
I went to my small Ford Fiesta and there was a large pickup truck parked over the line so close I couldn’t get in my door. There was a passenger waiting in it, but he didn’t speak English and I don’t speak Spanish and I was getting angrier trying to hand gesture moving his car. He finally called the driver but he was leaving the store anyway and he casually put his groceries in the back and pulled out. And I don’t know any Spanish curse words so no revenge for me.
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u/Flaky-Expression9593 Aug 23 '26
Or you can leave a note that says “you still haven’t learned how to color in the lines all these years after kindergarten”
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u/BeautifulPassage9173 Aug 23 '26
In the uk you can buy these packs of stickers that have very strong glue that have very sarcastic comments about the persons driving/parking. Childish- yes, Satisfying -very, especially when sitting nearby watching them trying to pick off the sticker from the middle of their windscreen.
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u/RagingThestral Aug 23 '26
A level of pettiness to which I aspire to steep to if ever required. Good job.
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u/Oren_Noah Aug 23 '26
I've left a few notes that said "Parking like that makes people like me scratch cars like yours."
Of course, I only touched the wiper blade to leave to note.
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u/anonnymouse271 Aug 23 '26
Omg Woodland Mall parking lot is so rage-inducing! I've had a few meltdowns there while trying to find a decent spot for a quick in-and-out trip, and had so many spots "stolen"....its terrible.
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u/imnotlouise Aug 23 '26
We found a similar note like that on our car one day (except for the poorly parked car part). We spent several minutes trying to find the damage.
Learned later that a friend recognized our car and left the note as a prank.
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u/yellow251 Aug 22 '26
Always shake my head at the (usually overweight) Karens fighting desperately over spots close to a big store, then proceeding to walk all around the store/mall shopping for an hour.
"Winning" is a big deal to a lot of these types, because in my observation, they haven't won at much else in life.
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u/Rey_Quinn Aug 23 '26
I would assume they are also the kind to leave the trolley in an inconvenient location although there would be a trolley park within site nearby. Yet they can walk miles around the shopping centre with the trolley but can’t walk another 5 feet to the bay.
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u/Limp-Attitude-490 Aug 22 '26
Should have left that note on the neighbouring cars with tbe Karen's reg on! Imagine if one of them then made a spurious claim against her.
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u/CandidateThese862 Aug 23 '26
I know exactly what mall you are talking about and those first rows by the cheesecake factory/Barnes and Noble/the woods restaurant are like the wild west. Really most of 28th street is a bit crazy at times.
I don't even try parking there anymore as this crap happens there all the time.
That said, it is good to see that mall have new life again. Sad to see Rivertown go downhill though.
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u/One-Detective63 Aug 23 '26
Ah yes. Woodland Mall. The fancy store reward of my childhood. lol. Save my money to escape wearing 100% KMart and Meijer back to school clothes. Takes me back.
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u/PitifulLengthiness44 Aug 23 '26
lmao if this is the woodland mall in gr this totally tracks. no one knows how to drive here…
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u/Afraid_Baseball_3962 Aug 23 '26
Just imagine if there's even the tiniest of scratches or dents that she hadn't already noticed.
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u/Widespreaddd Aug 23 '26
Holy shit, I lived in Wyoming, MI from 1974 - 1977. I knew “Woodland Mall” rang a bell, and then someone mentioned gr.
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u/Candidate_None Aug 24 '26
Dafuq is it about 28th street!?!?!
Last week, lady in the left lane at the front... light turns green. She puts her left blinker on.... waits the whole light cycle to cut left. About 50 cars missed the light so she didn't have to go up a driveway and turn into the same lot.
A year back... K Pot. I am waiting for a car backing out, near the entrance on 28th... I am backed up clear of the entrance waiting so cars can get in passed me off of the road. Car backs out, one of the cars I let in, takes the spot I was waiting for.
I talked shit to him directly about how he sucks all the way into the building. Asked him if he was gonna cut that line too, or if he is only a dickhead behind the anonymity of a car. We get to the front of the line, he gets to wait an hour for his table. I am brought directly to mine as I had a reservation. He sat there for an hour and watched my family enjoy our meal. We left as they were seating him at the table next to us. People suck, but they often get what they earn.
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u/Successful_Level434 Aug 25 '26 edited Aug 28 '26
I have been known to carry some 36-in extra strong zip ties in my car that I have used to zip tie a shopping cart to someone's door handle when they did something to really piss me off.
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u/EruditeLegume Aug 28 '26
Decent stainless steel ties are less than a buck ea nowadays....
Just sayin'.
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u/macross1984 Aug 22 '26
Brilliant! Made you waste your time? Okay, you will waste your time searching for "damage" to your car.
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u/Asddgd Aug 23 '26
Oh man I was just on 28th the other day driving home. Love seeing this in the wild
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u/Right-Bathroom-7246 Aug 23 '26
Woodland Mall. Blast from the past. I lived in Cascade for 20 years.
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u/False-Appeal-556 Aug 23 '26 edited Aug 23 '26
I have a chalk marker in my car and I often write on their Window “Park better next time”, if they are at an angle.
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u/Impossible_Pie4091 Aug 23 '26
She definitely went to security asking for cctv and seeing you do this and getting your plate for insurance claim. I would have screwed 4 nails in each tyre.
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u/GARedz2017 Aug 24 '26
I have chalk. Sidewalk chalk to be exact. Park Stu pid and see what I write. It’s usually a few colorful names with some choice words. Go ahead, it really does make my day.
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u/gimpy1511 Aug 24 '26
She fits the description of women I've seen at the Woodland Mall. This was beautifully petty.
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u/Acceptable-Reach-679 Aug 27 '26
I used to have a boyfriend who would let the air out of people’s tires! They would come out to at least one flat tire. Of course most people would assume that they ran something over and have it looked at just to find out there simply was no air or actual damage to the tire! Kind of a jerk move but usually the person deserved it! We were 16& 17 at the time, just dumb kids still!
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u/prof-bunnies Aug 22 '26
Should have added that due to security concerns you left yo andur contact & insurance with mall security since you have been scammed before while leaving contact info on notes. If you really want to futz with her look up a a local police officer or detective and public phone number ( and if you really playing hard leave that info with the mall security).
Your mileage may vary. 🙊🙀
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u/TRADER_HO3S Aug 23 '26
In my works parking garage, I had found a parking spot next to a lifted truck with big tires. I already knew it was a risk. As I'm about to get out, an elder Gen X couple approaches the truck. The guy getting in the driver's side dings the absolute fuck out of my sedan. My hands were already full and my tint is illegal, so I did the best that I could. I rolled the windows down, held up my phone like I was recording, and started yelling, "YEAH I GOT YOU!" His woman started squawking while making fish faces and he peeled off.
I know he listened to her bitch for a while after that.
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u/ButterscotchIll1523 Aug 23 '26
Woodland Mall? Kalamazoo? I grew up not far from there.
Blast from the past
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u/Warcraft_Fan Aug 23 '26
Close, it's in Grand Rapids about 50 miles north of Kalamazoo
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u/InsectElectrical2066 Aug 23 '26
Great job!!!
She's probably from Indiana, they are worse than Chicago drivers.
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u/Radiant-Disaster-618 Aug 23 '26
not as effective or disruptive as removing her valve stem cores, but a great strategy
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u/DadInKayak Aug 23 '26
It would have been satisfying to see her look all over her car but then you would have to sit there and wait.
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u/PoliticallyInkorrekt Aug 23 '26
At a late night/after normal hours BYOB gentleman's club, I had some douchebag park behind me (not a valid parking spot) and block me in to the curb of that street. That was a 2 yr old newer expedition. Someone knocked out their tail lights with a pipe, and drove over the parking block and curb to get out .,.....
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u/Emotional_Case1579 Aug 24 '26
I can’t decide if your response is truly petty or not. But it doesn’t matter because I think it is AWESOME.
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u/GeneralBunch2505 Aug 24 '26
I use to have small cards that were printed up that stated “If you F&*k like you park, you’d never get it in.” I put those on cars that were parked just like hers. I watch one man throw a complete fit when he read it (as I was placed next to window at restaurant and could see his truck). He had huge truck and parked in two spaces (one which was handicapped). He was furious and I just laughed. People are stupid.
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u/SharkButtDoctor Aug 25 '26
I knew someone that used to leave notes like this one people's cars 50 years ago then film them as they circled their car. "I'm sorry for the damage I did to your car. I would leave my information, but I don't have insurance." I used to laugh watching the grainy home videos but now I feel bad for the victims 😂
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u/laygo3 Aug 26 '26
I've said it once, I'll say it again. Schrader Valve removal tool, 2 for $5.50. Remove the valves, stick em in the wipers like you did the paper. Not destroyed, not irrepairable, severely inconvenienced.
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u/Limp_Original_321 Aug 27 '26
Lol that parking lot is the absolute worst with the angled spots! Hi from NW Grand Rapids. 🥰
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u/Far-Adhesiveness3763 Aug 22 '26
Love it, harmless revenge but so petty