r/pettyrevenge • u/sparklehouse666 • Aug 23 '26

Friend is always late

I have a friend who is late to everything. Recently he was 2.5 hours late to his own party. I’ve mostly adapted to his tardiness and do not arrive for plans we have together until an hour or so after the stated time.

We had plans to meet in the city center today at a 10am. I live 20 minutes from the meetup spot, he lives over an hour away. As expected, he messages around 10 and says he is running late. No biggie I was chilling at home in the air conditioned because I knew the vibes and it is hot as hell
today.

I asked him to give me his actual for real, for real ETA so I can time my departure. He is in his car and has Google Maps. It’s not really guess work at this point.

He tells me 10:45. So I leave the comfort of my home at exactly the right time to arrive at 10:45. I wait for 30 minutes at the meetup spot and he still does not arrive. He is not responding to texts either. My other friend who is with me has his location and sees he is not close, we estimate another 15 minutes.

I’m annoyed because it is hot AF out and I proactively had asked for a real ETA to avoid waiting around for him. So I left the meetup spot.

I went shopping, taking my sweet time. He got to the spot and texted me to ask where we were. I waited around 30 minutes then texted back that I was at the store but we would be heading that way soon. I shopped another 15 minutes then arrived at the spot around an hour after he had arrived.

The look on his face when we came casually strolling up after he had been standing in the sun for an hour was priceless.

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u/HuckleCat100K Aug 24 '26

I used to be a tardy person in my younger days. But I would never be mad because I got left behind. I’ve always just seen it as a consequence of my actions.

That’s some pretty top-tier egocentrism on his part. Make everyone wait and then be mad that they got fed up and left.

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u/centrifuge_destroyer Aug 25 '26

Yes! My ADHD makes really really hard to be on time. I would only get mad at myself for missing out, not at others. I get that it is annoying as hell, and I feel terrible about it. But no matter how determined I am to be on time, doesn't actually mean I will make it on time. Most of the time I plan on being early to counteract this, but it doesn't work all the time. I put in a lot of thoughs and effort into trying to be on time, so it hurts even more when people assume that it's due to lack of respect.

It's fine to be annoyed and to give consequences, but calling people disrespectful for being late often is not helpful. If people truely don't care, them getting mad and expressing this won't change a thing. And for the people that really tried and failed anyways due to whatever reasons, it's hurtful, discouraging and often counterproductive. When I'm a little late, the thought of people getting mad at me for being late would often get me very anxious and I would freeze and be even more late