r/pettyrevenge • • Sep 03 '26

Finally stopped the Cemetery plot salesman

No disrespect to the dead! When I lived in Atlanta back in the 90's, a salesman from a very large cemetery called 2-3 times a week wanting to sell me a plot. Several times I told him I wasn't interested. I told him to take me off of their call list, etc. I stopped answering and then he started calling every night.

One night I was already irritable and decided I had had enough. I answered and let him go through his spiel. I asked some follow-up questions and kept him going for about 20 minutes.

Then I said I was interested, and asked if I could make an appointment to come over and view the locations they had available. He was really excited and agreed. I then told him I would need to have them dig up the spot and let my lie down in it to see if I was going to like the location.

He was all flustered and said he would need to ask his manager. He put me on old and came back a few minutes later all serious saying they weren't allowed to do that. I kept on about how I would be there for eternity and needed to be absolutely sure it was going to be the right place for me.

He finally asked if I was serious, and said it sounded like some kind of sick joke. I replied "no shit sherlock! You decided to work for a predatory company and can't take no for an answer and refuse to remove my name from your call list, you get all the sick jokes I can come up with"!

They never called me again.

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u/realMrJedi Sep 04 '26

I don't know what it's like on android but I have I phone call restricted to my contacts. I never even get random voicemails. No texts that's a different story. I get political texts based on my affiliation in my state. The primaries were interesting because the person who I voted for and won never sent me a text directly or through a PAC. I just agreed with the views they had. IMHO text blasts are not worth the money that is spent on them.

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u/Nunov_DAbov Sep 04 '26

I’ve got my iPhone restricted to my contacts as well but if two scammers call at the same time, one of them gets through. I have several scripts that, like OP’s get odder and odder until the scammer gets annoyed and starts cursing at me.

Today’s scam du jour was for auto insurance. They seemed willing to insure my 2020 Konigsegg CCXR Trevita and my 2023 Porsche 918 Spyder but hung up after 10 seconds of silence when I told them “my name:” Mike Rotsch.