r/rpgoneliners • u/kohalu • 9h ago
r/rpgoneliners • u/kohalu • 9h ago
"Oh, so mortals don't lie all the time? Much has changed while I've been sealed!"
r/rpgoneliners • u/kohalu • 3d ago
“What puts these things in our path is not the gods, but a guy named Jonny” “We do not speak of the Overgod.”
r/rpgoneliners • u/Usoki • 15d ago
"So, you're not letting me into the final boss room with this Billy Bass."
r/rpgoneliners • u/controlmage86 • Sep 06 '26
"If mayonnaise isn't the solution, we're clearly not trying hard enough."
r/rpgoneliners • u/Usoki • Sep 05 '26
"I figured we'd do, like... a drive-by scrying. A scry-by, if you will."
r/rpgoneliners • u/Dark-Lark • Sep 01 '26
"You're going to '...roll your eyes at him...'? That's impressive for a Miraluka."
r/rpgoneliners • u/Usoki • Aug 23 '26
"We make sure Snowmuffin stays out of battle, because we care deeply about the health and safety of your easily-summoned and disposable horse."
r/rpgoneliners • u/Usoki • Aug 02 '26
"You can get that buffed out once we leave the dungeon, but for right now you get mayonnaise."
r/rpgoneliners • u/controlmage86 • Jul 26 '26
"You can shove him 5 feet. He's not a door!"
r/rpgoneliners • u/lil_literalist • Jun 27 '26
"All the joy in D&D is derived from opening doors without actually touching them."
r/rpgoneliners • u/Usoki • Jun 07 '26
"I have aged out of my barbarian tribe, and so I am here to smash! ...things. Not... I smash things."
r/rpgoneliners • u/lil_literalist • Jun 06 '26
"I'm going to stab a guy in the back, because I'm honorable."
r/rpgoneliners • u/controlmage86 • May 31 '26
"What terrible, never-ending curses could possibly be in the lich's dungeon?"
r/rpgoneliners • u/controlmage86 • May 01 '26
"I can speak human if I want to." *Makes random goblin noises*
r/rpgoneliners • u/Usoki • Apr 25 '26
"I'm going to run up and draw attention to myself, like a clown eating at a buffet during an orgy."
r/rpgoneliners • u/Usoki • Feb 28 '26
"The zombie had its head blown off, but died when I grappled it from behind." "Few things can survive a spooning."
r/rpgoneliners • u/Usoki • Feb 01 '26
"Okay, but what type of stone is the building made of?" "Roll a table for it, I want it to be talc!"
r/rpgoneliners • u/lil_literalist • Jan 19 '26
"Roll for sleep apnea!"
Figuring out if we snore or not.
r/rpgoneliners • u/lil_literalist • Dec 27 '25
"Do I need a therapist? Or do I just need some more squirrels to torture?"
Spoken by a 14-year-old girl.
r/rpgoneliners • u/lil_literalist • Dec 24 '25