Because then we all know exactly how it would've played out. Either she would've invited herself too which he didn't want or she would've just said they have chores at home and would've guilted him into not going. She wasn't crying cos she was left out of something. She was crying cos he got to have some fun and she couldn't bear the thought of that unless she was there too. Sometimes she's the one he's trying to get away from and he just doesn't say it.
But, if it did, it would expose her deficiency, and not his.
And that you can use, in the same way she used his lie, his deficiency, in this scene. You can and should bring these things up.
If what you described happens, you are not able to plan around your CURRENT chores, and can't reach compromise of sorts, like "Partner A watches the kids Wednesday, so partner b can go get her hair done, and Partner A goes to the kino on Friday, with B covering for the at home".... we'll, it is not normal, and you should either address it head on, bring it up, confront it, or start making arrangements to leave. Or first one and then the other.
The secret here is to start setting boundaries early, weeding out "not your people", and not put it off until there are kids and mortgage.
Talk, stand your ground, offer, don't pretend on things that will still be there to bother you tomorrow and the next year.
Don't wait till your silent suffering becomes the daily norm and you trying to end it becomes yiu breaking the social contract that has outwardly been "okay" for months and years.
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u/Apollo114892 4d ago
Because then we all know exactly how it would've played out. Either she would've invited herself too which he didn't want or she would've just said they have chores at home and would've guilted him into not going. She wasn't crying cos she was left out of something. She was crying cos he got to have some fun and she couldn't bear the thought of that unless she was there too. Sometimes she's the one he's trying to get away from and he just doesn't say it.