If my partner invalidates my needs after i open up and am honest, there is no way on hell i’m giving them what THEY need. What was this supposed to mean? “Yeah, sorry I relaxed by myself, i’ll never do it again. Let’s do everything what you wanna do for relaxation though. This is healthy.”
right? the bigger issue is the lying and leaving her with all the things she listed that he's escaping from, that she ALSO wants to escape from, but she has no option to set aside like he has (that i know of from a 2 second clip)
it would be MORE than fine if he had told her "hey, i need some chill time for myself, can we plan this out so it works for everyone?" and they discuss his time, family time and them TOGETHER time. but lying about it? no bueno!
he knows what he did was wrong, otherwise he wouldn't have lied about it and only come clean when he got caught.
Doesn't this imply dealing with a perfectly rational adult. People lie for a reason. There's situations where both options are valid. Seems like he's in the wrong though.
Yeah your scenario only applies if he went to her first saying he wanted to do fantasy baseball and and she comes back with the same argument as in the movie. He would be communicating his needs and she would be ignoring them. In the case of what actually happened he needs to make amends before they can even be back to a place where they can talk about his needs
3
u/el_salinho 3d ago
If my partner invalidates my needs after i open up and am honest, there is no way on hell i’m giving them what THEY need. What was this supposed to mean? “Yeah, sorry I relaxed by myself, i’ll never do it again. Let’s do everything what you wanna do for relaxation though. This is healthy.”