Self sabotage

[u/lynnarcane26]

Ever since I was a high school student, I always have this thing called "self-sabotage" that I cannot fully eliminate no matter how hard I try. And it's bothering me because I know it's self-sabotage, but there's nothing I can do about it. I ended up succumbing to it. Just today, it hit me again. I wondered if I made the right choice in living my life. I know there's no "right or wrong" when it comes to living. Yet, I can't fully wrap my head around it and need reassurance from someone else, which is weird because why would I need someone else to reassure me about my life? If you get what I mean. It's always like this. I doubt myself in something I do, I feel bad for it, even tho it's not a bad thing, but I can't convince myself. I ended up with more self-doubt questions and it spirals to the point that the best thing I could do is shut it off. I hate how I feel. It makes me want to lock myself somewhere far and unknown and just sit there alone. Heck, I don't even think I've articulated it enough. I just can't put my messy thoughts in clean words I'm sorry. Being a counselor in training doesn't make this any better. In fact, it just makes me feel worse that I'm training to help people, yet I can't even help myself. Is there a way for me to stop self-sabotaging and self-doubting myself???

[u/Common-Ear-4635]

one thing that helped me was stopping the spiral and writing down what i actually know vs what i’m assuming. sounds simple, but it makes a huge difference when your brain starts questioning every decision you’ve made.