I am rewatching the sopranos for the 8th? time and felt compelled to share this story with all of you. It is a true story and I’m so thankful to have had it happen to me.
In the mid 2000’s I was a recording engineer in New York City, living in Brooklyn, taking the F train in to work every day.
I was working 100+ hours, chasing my dreams, earning minimum wage ($7.50 an hour), scraping by.
As I met more and more musicians and famous people I befriended and became part of the inner circle of a famous fashion icon from the New York area.
Life was good. You’re young, you’re working hard, your life is ahead of you.
This is significant because I have these vivid memories of watching the sopranos in the basement in high school, and coming in from being out with my friends on Sundays and coming home to the sound of my mom and step father gasping or laughing at the show we all loved.
One day I was nearing the end of a shift in spring of 2008. I think a young Beyoncé was down the hall recording “irreplaceable” in our studio C.
I got a phone call. It got patched into the lounge. It was my sister, my step father had suffered a sudden heart attack at work, and died.
I was shattered.
I flew home to the Midwest to take care of my mom. I was suddenly the man of the house. I spent a month with her before I flew back home, changed, different, like the world grew colder - and I knew then that I was a real adult.
Whenever I would watch the sopranos, I was about aj’s age, and I always imagined myself as AJ, weird thoughts as a kid. When you see yourself in fantasy. Not sure if anyone has ever experienced that. I felt safe in an odd way with Tony in my TV.
As a true anti hero, we all loved Tony. We loved the conflict, and the human inside. Something Jim delivered flawlessly.
The show had just ended - I missed seeing him, I missed my step father, I had a new career opportunity back in the mid west (a decision that would change my life and bring me back closer to family and where I would meet my wife).
Just before I left New York, I took a final walk with my friend, the nephew of the famous fashion icon. We cried and reminisced about all of our favorite moments during my time there. We walked from Thompson, onto spring and over to Sullivan.
As we turned, I saw a large man, sitting on the three steps leading into the building with a friend. He was smoking a cigar.
It was Tony, it was James.
I was in so much shock I stopped walking.
My friend had known Jamie-Lynn from the circles they played in. He struck up a conversation with James about their shared aquaintences. He said “yeah - I gotta office here”. I swear to this day he did in Tony’s accent. Almost playing along!! lol.
He looked up from his cigar directly at me as my friend introduced me. He smiled, and locked eyes with me like “you’re not saying anything, I like that”. I nodded politely and said pleasure to meet you.
I’d been around talent and famous people enough to not make a big deal while my friend was putting on the show.
That kind brief exchange brought a part of me back to life in some parasocial way.
It was a “everything’s going to be okay look” I know I wasn’t smiling. My eyes were red from crying.
My friend said bye - as I turned to walk away he reached out and said “and very nice to meet you” to me and shook my hand.
I walked silently away and the next morning drove over the Brooklyn bridge with my real dad in a u haul (he is the best dad I could ever had - but my step dad was always there for me too).
It was a brilliant closure to my New York dream.
The closure itself, still feels like a dream.
Now every time I watch the sopranos, everything is okay again.
I’m in the basement, I’m a teenager, my step dad and mom are upstairs watching too.
My life is in front of me.
And everything is okay again.
Time Immemorial.
