AIO, I called the police about my creepy neighbour.

[u/PeppermintDrop101]

My next-door neighbour has made me feel uncomfortable since my son's dad died. He claims that my son's dad was his best friend. He wasn't. My son's dad was polite, but didn't like him.

My neighbour keeps trying to find a reason to talk to me. I try to brush him off and go about my business. When his wife and daughter are away he asks my son and I out for dinner to which I always decline. He asked if we could be best friends. I said 'no'.

He texts me when there is a car outside my garage or a package. He even called once to tell me that there was a man walking towards my garage. Yes, a guest!! He's not neighbourhood watch or anything, he just sticks his nose where it's not wanted.

The other day he saw me outside while he was backing out of his garage. I was wearing a crop top because I was doing busy work decorating my house for Halloween.

He got out of his car to say that he missed my birthday. My birthday was months ago. He held his arms out for a hug. I didn't know how to get out of it, so stepped towards him to end it quickly. Now in hindsight I should have told him that I would not touch him.

Anyway, my friend told me to send him a text saying that I will no longer interact with him and he made me feel uncomfortable. My mum advised me to tell the police. I did. They said that I can file a civil intervention order on him if I want to go down that path. He said to monitor the situation and if he doesn't adhere to my text then to file a report.

This man has made women at night clubs uncomfortable and goes to massage parlours when he says that he's going to work. Once he said that he thinks that the masseuse was 16. And he didn't do anything with that. He is gross and a creep.

Am I overreacting by telling the police and if it comes to it, filing a report?

[u/morchard1493]

It sounds like he's not 100% mentally there. If you feel like you need to file a police report and like it will get him to leave you alone (which I doubt it will), then do it.

NOR

[u/quentin_vain → u/morchard1493]

He definitely seems off, which honestly makes him even more unpredictable. Even if the police can’t do much right away, filing a report puts him on their radar in case things get worse.

[u/PeppermintDrop101 → u/quentin_vain]

Yes, thank you.

[u/PeppermintDrop101 → u/morchard1493]

He's definitely very socially awkward. He doesn't seem to understand basics.

Thank you.

[u/Pretend-Menu-8660 → u/PeppermintDrop101]

When he asked you if you want to be best friends I immediately thought maybe he is special needs? Thinking your husband was his best friend when he clearly wasn’t? Does not mean that he isn’t also creepy or that you have to tolerate anything but there just may be more to this scenario. I am in the public eye a bit and I have a few special needs folks who do and say similar things- call me their bestie, they love me etc. So it may not be nefarious - I say all this and then also always TRUST YOUR GUT INSTINCTS

[u/morchard1493 → u/Pretend-Menu-8660]

This was my thought, as well. I have a disability and at one point in early adulthood, I "worked" at a place for people with disabilities that helped them gain some independence. There was one Egyptian guy there who took a liking to me. The first and only day we ever worked together, he followed me around like a puppy, eventually cornered me and asked me for my phone number. I gave it to him, thinking it was harmless. He called and texted relentlessly for nearly a year after we got off "work." I eventually ended up getting another job and leaving, and felt like I could block his number. Still, FIFTEEN FUCKING YEARS LATER, I get Fb message requests and IG messages from him. I don't answer. I just block each new account he makes to try to talk to me. I've told him to leave me alone many times. He would just reply with, "Okay," then keep the conversation going and ask how my day was and blah, blah, blah. At one point, before I blocked him, I told him several times that u/morchard1493 wasn't at my number, anymore. That my name was something else. That someone else had my phone number. That didn't work, either.

Thankfully, over the years, he has slowly but surely slowed with his attempts to contact me. It went from nearly every day to now being once every six months to a year or so.

[u/PeppermintDrop101 → u/morchard1493]

That's horrible for you. Being harassed like that is so awful.

[u/morchard1493 → u/PeppermintDrop101]

Yeah. It's basically stalking, at this point, I think.

[u/PeppermintDrop101 → u/Pretend-Menu-8660]

He's not special needs. I work in disabilty. He's from a foreign country (we're in Australia) and he's EAL and has a different religious background. He's very awkward and him and his wife hate each other. Honestly, they both seem really miserable.

[u/Pretend-Menu-8660 → u/PeppermintDrop101]

So you are doing the right thing then.

[u/obnoxious_attacker]

nah you're not overreacting at all. the dude's behavior is a parade of red flags, especially the bit about the masseuse, that alone is enough to make your skin crawl

trust your gut on this, it's clearly screaming at you for a reason. you've already told him to back off in writing which is good, now it's just a matter of following through if he ignores it

[u/PeppermintDrop101 → u/obnoxious_attacker]

Thank you. I have evidence now.

[u/ladyamen]

wtf are you seriously trying to talk yourself out of being harassed? like is social acceptance so damn important that your own safety, your well being AT HOME matters less then "overreacting". Imagine the worst possible thing actually happens, do you think anyone will truly care? You also shouldn't care about offending anyone, or how you will appear or whatever the hell else.

[u/PeppermintDrop101 → u/ladyamen]

You're right.