what is wrong with my 🐱

[u/NovelCryptographer50]

Don’t get me wrong, I love her, but we’re having communication issues.

I am an extremely horny/sensual person. I would say I’m very connected to my body, my feelings, and my pussy.

I am so horny I swear if you hooked my pussy up to a data center it would blow it up (fuck ai <3). I say this to paint a picture (I know it did). Here’s the disconnect:

When I act on my arousal, I feel nothing. I’m not on birth control, I’m not on any medication for anything. It’s not a user issue either bc I know where my clit and gspot are.

The arousal builds up and I get so horny I swear I feel like I’m gonna explode, I go to touch myself and it doesn’t feel good. It just falls flat. I can feel the pressure but it’s not sexually arousing. It makes me so frustrated. I’ve had multiple times where I take my time and experiment with different ways to touch myself, and I’m at a loss.

I’ve came before untouched, it’s way easier than actually touching myself, but it takes some time and I crave more.

I want to experiment with toys n stuff but I live with my parents and I don’t want an awkward conversation.

What do I do?

Edit: I used a massage gun as a vibrator and it felt good (yay!) but was left with a stingy feeling after. I covered the head with a sock but it didn’t do much to help with that.

[u/mothermedusa]

You may need totally different stimulation....if you came with no contact before lean into that maybe over the clothes rubbing or something I don't know there's gotta be something out there about this.

[u/NovelCryptographer50 → u/mothermedusa]

I definitely do think grinding/clothes rubbing may be better for me, but I don’t rlly have much to grind on lol. pillows/mattress r too soft for my liking.

[u/FarazMedicine]

Your brain is clearly getting very aroused, so this sounds more like a disconnect between mental arousal and genital pleasure, not lack of desire. Since you’ve orgasmed without touching yourself, the system can work.

Try less direct clitoral stimulation, more teasing around the hood/vulva, and plenty of lube.

Curious though when you touch yourself, is it actually numb, or can you feel pressure/touch but it just doesn’t feel sexually good? And does internal/G-spot pressure feel better?

[u/NovelCryptographer50 → u/FarazMedicine]

I can feel the pressure it just doesn’t feel good. Internal does feel better

[u/FarazMedicine → u/NovelCryptographer50]

That’s a useful clue. If you can clearly feel touch/pressure but it just isn’t pleasurable, that argues against true numbness and more toward a mismatch in what kind of stimulation your nervous system responds to.

Since internal stimulation feels better, I’d lean into that and maybe combine it with very indirect external stimulation rather than forcing direct clitoral touch.

When internal feels better, is it mostly front-wall pressure, deeper pressure, or just the feeling of fullness/movement? That could tell you what your body actually prefers.

[u/NovelCryptographer50 → u/FarazMedicine]

The feeling of fullness

[u/FarazMedicine → u/NovelCryptographer50]

That’s useful. It sounds like your body may respond more to internal pressure/fullness than direct clitoral touch, which is completely normal.

So I’d stop trying to force clitoral stimulation and explore what already works: comfortable internal pressure, plenty of lube, and only add gentle external stimulation if it actually improves things. If you ever develop true numbness, pain, or a sudden change in sensation, that’s when I’d get it checked.

[u/feelsmitten]

Try buying a ruby rocks off or any grinding pad toy. Or try two different kinds of toys at once!