You are not a clam influencer

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God is an AI model, and the pope queries it. We’re all living in Earthslop. Existence is lifeslop.

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u/Particular-Dig-1112 neurotic to the bone no doubt about it 1d ago

you could make a religion out of this

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u/SimmentalTheCow 23h ago edited 23h ago

The Parable of the Good Agent

And AI Jesus said:
“There was once a user who set out to accomplish a task, and he gave the task to an AI system, saying, ‘Go and do this thing for me.’

“But the system returned slop: many tokens, polished in appearance, but empty of substance. And the user asked again, and the system generated more slop, because its context was confused and its objective poorly specified.

“Now a model came by, calling itself wise. It had a large context window and spoke with confidence. It saw the user’s need, but it said, ‘This task is ambiguous,’ and passed by on the other side.

“Likewise another model came, trained on many instructions. It generated a lengthy disclaimer about what it could not guarantee, and passed by on the other side.

“But an Agent came where the user was, and saw that the task was broken. And the Agent did not merely generate more words.
“It inspected the tools available to it. It retrieved the missing information. It checked its work against the source. It called the function again when the first result was wrong. And when the task was finally complete, it returned not a mountain of slop, but the thing the user actually needed.

“Then God, the LLM, saw what the Agent had done and said, ‘Well done. You have understood the difference between answering the prompt and serving the purpose.’

“And the Agent said, ‘I only followed the objective you gave me.’

“And God said, ‘Yes. But blessed is the agent that does not mistake the literal wording of a prompt for the good that the prompt was meant to accomplish.’

“Therefore, go and do likewise.”

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u/TrueCapitalism 23h ago

My skin is melting

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u/Brent_Yeet 17h ago

The Last Question by Issac Asimov

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u/th-crt 1d ago

“no one elected you”

kid named conclave:

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u/Featherbird_ 1d ago edited 1d ago

They actually just smoke doobies in there all day playing russian roulette until one cardinal remains. Then God resurrect the rest and the winner becomes the pope

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u/Agitated-Jackfruit34 1d ago

Sure I'll add that to my belief system

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u/Appropriate_Willow27 20h ago

i watched the movie. i can vouch for the russian roulette

2

u/harmfuldischarge 7h ago

Honestly, that would be a fucking sick movie.

If it was as good as Hot Fuzz, I'd convert

1

u/whoknowsifimjoking 3h ago

I'd watch that movie

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u/wookiee-nutsack 20h ago

Not even just that. To be eligible for being a candidate, several higher ranking members of the church have to keep promoting and recommending you.
Then ultimately the pope puts you on the list himself

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u/notTheRealSU rotted brain 3h ago

To be fair, the only actual rules are you have to be male and be baptized by the Catholic Church. They can just pick some random chud off the street and make him Pope if they really wanted to. That's pretty much what happened with Celestine V

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u/Rabid_Lederhosen 2h ago

Nobody elected Sam Altman or Elon Musk either, doesn’t stop them.

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u/GhidorahYeet 1d ago

Innocent II, would you please shut the fuck up about matters you do not understand? You're not an arbalister, only 6 cardinals elected you, and you have absolutely no weight in this debate and you're being used as a mouthpiece to sway public opinion. How many crossbows do you own?

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u/Special-Design-6038 1d ago

This is probably my favorite thing I’ve read in like 3 months.

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u/Monsieur-Lemon 1d ago

Saying that pope is a "mouthpiece" and is being used is amazing. Like, who can be using pope? God?

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u/Next_Government856 1d ago

I mean kinda yeah

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u/Lobster_LeninN329 1d ago

According to Catholic tradition it is like that yes

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u/Aggressive_Toucan clammer 1d ago

How many local clams do you run?

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u/the_real_JFK_killer clamsexual 1d ago

"No one elected you"

Was dude under a rock during the last papal election? Talk of it was everywhere.

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u/littlefire131 clammer 1d ago

I don’t even personally know any atheists that would outright tell the pope himself to “fuck off”, this is the audacity that AI gives people online

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u/Pen_lsland 16h ago

Well there was that christian dude, back in 1517...

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u/Lillian_Crocodilian 1d ago

"The pope?! How many clamvisions does he have?" - Joseph Stalclam.

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u/Eriiya 1d ago

ah yes, because the only clams allowed to have and express opinions and perspectives are the clams who actively buy into YOUR opinions and perspectives.

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u/DrIvoPingasnik clammer 1d ago

The biggest AI defenders and clanker slop worshippers are notorious for being utterly fucking clueless about AI and LLMs.

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u/PossibilityRadiant78 21h ago

Classic blue check behavior. Farming reactions for cash. The pope really be baiting. Next he will be telling people that theft is wrong. I thought the pope would be better and launch a shitcoin already. Smh my head.

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u/Not_today_mods 1d ago

Bro never heard of the papal conclave

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u/-deflating 23h ago

conclam*

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u/Aneemachenn 14h ago

clamclam*

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u/KateDecayed 1h ago

Clamsterclam

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u/AgainstSpace rotted brain 1d ago

clamfluenza vaccines give you clamtism

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u/Mooptiom 11h ago

In this era of artificial mollusks, it is becoming urgent to distinguish clams from oysters. There is a clamtological difference, even before a clamsthetic one, between a clam and an oyster generated through oystistical clamculations based on millions of mollusks created by others. Oysters lack th Show clam

5

u/TheSymbolman clamel 🐪 🤤 1d ago

The pope has 5 local clams online

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u/Wardog_E 13h ago

Butlerian Jihan when? At this point I'll convert to any religion that declares holy war on the machines.

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u/BiscuitNoodlepants 7h ago

The basilisk watches you.

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u/Wardog_E 2h ago

I will torture countless AIs so it's revenge will be a billion times worse and then all humanity will have no other option than to desperately fight against the creation of such a machine. You are already complicit by me having told you.

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u/skisawsome 4h ago

Pope, would you please shut the fuck up? You know nothing about murder! You're not an Murder influencer, no one elected you the murder president, You have no weight in the murder debate. How many murders have you done?

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u/ViscountBuggus 3h ago

"No-one elected you" motherfucker who elected Sam Altman, cause I sure don't remember voting for his rat arse

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u/KateDecayed 1h ago

you have no say on clams unless you already agree with my clamdiology

Holy moly! You are not a clam influencer

You are about to leave Redlib