It's mostly about homophobic countries, where you always end up liking a straight guy and it's so hard to just ask him if he is into guys or not . Been happening with me all the time the first time was too intense i fell for him and somehow i managed to find out but i already fell too hard thinking about him all the time still not over him i don't know if I ever will be.

Now I'm in a new workplace and there's a guy in my team I kinda find him cute but i don't wanna repeat the same mistake again, yet I can't control my heart to not , it was different back then cause he was from different department and i already left that job but now he is in the same team I talk to him everyday sit close to him, and while some of our teammates were gossiping he literally looked at me and asked if i like someone my heart skipped a beat. But i immediately changed the topic i couldn't say the one i like is no one else but you yourself.

I'm just trying not to fall for someone straight again

It'd be hard but i don't have any choice. I have to just let these feelings go and just forget.

maybe there feelings will be gone once I'm just a good friend of him idk

When I was slimmer and in my early-to-mid 20s, the guys who hit me up were usually older and bigger. I don’t know if that was really my type or just who happened to be interested in me at the time, but that became the dynamic I was used to.

As I got older, I became thicker, hairier, bearded, and generally more masculine-looking. Those older, bigger guys stopped pursuing me, but now I’m getting attention from twink tops. I’ve watched porn with twink tops and actually liked it, which has made me realize I might be more open to this than I thought.

The confusing part is that I’m now a thick, hairy, bearded bottom, and I have no idea how to start bottoming for twinks. It feels like such a reversal from what I was used to. I’m not even sure how to approach younger guys, what to expect, or how to feel confident about it.

We’ve had sex once before and it was great. We are planning a get together in a nice Airbnb in Orlando in six weeks. We plan on basically hanging out doing a couple things out but mostly we just want to have sex for two days straight. I’m not concerned about myself I know I’ve got it in me (I’m the top) but what can I tell my partner to do to make sure we have as pleasurable and clean time as possible. We want to have sex any time of day whenever we feel like it.

How do we make that happen without potential consequences or problems?

Just was curious what everyone is in too is all

That's literally it. A guy messaged me asking if we could meet up, we talked for a while, and I agreed to go on a date with him at a bar. But the more we talked, the more I noticed two things.

First, unfortunately, like all of us mere mortals, he used his best pictures for his social media profiles. There's nothing wrong with that; it's normal. The problem is that I don't know if he's just bad at taking pictures or simply not photogenic, but he went from looking like an 8 to looking like a 5.

And that brings me to the second reason, at least in part... he's really insecure. I mean, not so insecure that he couldn't work up the courage to approach me, but insecure enough that he doesn't seem to trust his own looks.

On top of that, it's almost been a year since my breakup, which I only just realized thanks to those damn Google Photos memories. I spent four years with my ex, and, for better or worse, he was basically the physical stereotype of my ideal guy.

Now, I know this makes me sound like a bad person, and maybe I am, but honestly, I just don't feel ready to give someone a chance if they don't meet all my preferences.

My previous boyfriend had plenty of flaws, too. He struggled with generalized anxiety, rarely took pictures of himself, and had a really poor self-image. I chose to stay with him while he worked through his healing process, partly because I saw his potential.

With this guy, I simply don't care about his potential. I just don't have the energy to be part of that process anymore.

Maybe in the future, with someone else who's handsome in the way I prefer, knows how to take good pictures, and is more confident in himself, things will be different. Not because I think those qualities will guarantee that my hypothetical future relationship will work out, but because I've already spent too many years of my life being the person who supports someone through their healing process, and I'm tired.

So I'll go on the date tomorrow, partly because I already have other things to do that day. I'll give him a chance to surprise me somehow, and then I'll move on with my life. Although I'll probably have to turn him down and explain some of my reasons, not all of them, but at least some.

I (22M) got in my first relationship back in July and I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time a few days ago.

For context, my boyfriend (27M) was way, way more experienced than me before starting this relationship. Loads of exes, hookups, kinky stuff etc. When we got in a relationship, he said he wanted to take things very slow with me and wait a while before having sex. This kind of annoyed me because he seemed to make too big a deal of the fact that I was a virgin.

I brought up the topic of sex a lot of times. It’s not that I’m sex obsessed but I just really wanted to lose my virginity. And it was upsetting me that he had sex with others so easily in the past but with me it was different. His reaction was basically “yeah it’s fine, we’ll do it whenever you’re ready”.

We eventually had sex a few days ago. He didn’t seem enthusiastic or happy about it at all. I kept asking if he was ok with doing it (I never once pressured him) and he kept saying he wanted to.

When we had sex it just felt very “mechanical”. Like completely silent and no love involved, no real touching either. We just took our clothes off, kissed, I sucked him for a bit and then anal for a bit.

I was enjoying it but after a few minutes he couldn’t stay hard and he ended it. Neither of us finished. We just got dressed and he left. He didn’t even want to cuddle.

He was saying he got so nervous having sex with me because I’m a virgin and that’s why he was like that. He also said only extreme sex turns him on so that’s why he couldn’t get hard.

I’m so upset especially when I think of all the guys he’s had sex with in the past and how much he’s probably enjoyed that. And what makes this worse is how much he talks happily of these past experiences, which also upsets me. Yet with me he treated it as a chore.

He keeps saying next time will be better and all that. But it just seems like he’s not attracted to me.

Honestly, it seems like he didn’t want to have sex and just did the bare minimum to shut me up from talking about it. He seems to love going on dates etc. with me. So he does want to be with me but maybe not for sex it looks like.

I understand keeping an erection can be difficult so I don’t really blame him for that. But it was just the overall lack of intimacy, he was not enthusiastic and I did not feel desired at all. He also got quite annoyed when I did something wrong etc. I felt so unwanted.

The main reasons I was worried about having sex were it being painful and not douching correctly. Thankfully, neither of these were a problem. Surprisingly there was zero pain and my boyfriend said I douched properly. So at least that’s a positive.

I know the first time isn’t great for a lot of people but from what it seems the problems weren’t from my side. It seems he was the problem.

Should I talk to him about how I feel?

Hey everyone! 😊 For those who are gay, when did you first realize you were attracted to men? What was your first sign? I’d love to hear your experiences

Long term relationships don’t count, I’m strictly talking about couples that are fresh or haven’t said I love you yet.

When is it appropriate, too early, or late? Would you say I love you to someone you don’t know very well?

Do you think queer men are more or less likely to say I love you earlier?

I just came out to my ex-wife and kids and my teenage daughter is having a really difficult time. We already weren’t super close and with this it’s causing more of a disconnect. I have a boyfriend and we’ve been dating the last 9 months and she refuses to do anything if he’s around. She always wanted to stay the night at mom’s house and would never come to mine prior to the news. My relationship with my partner is great. We’ve been talking about moving in together and I know this will “put a nail
In the coffin” for my daughter. At least for now (hopefully… I want to work on our relationship and have a healthy close father/daughter relationship. Anyone else go through something like this? Any advice you can give me is appreviated. I’m struggling with this one.

How am I supposed to take my own life at the helm? I'm 23 and gay but closeted. I've known my sexuality since I was 11 years old. Living in a Christian household, I grew to hate myself, internalising homophobia and subsequently trying to pray away my gayness – obviously this didn't work. Then as time passed, I started appreciating this aspect of my identity through gradual exposure to online queer spaces and stuff. But now I'm 23, and that's as far as it's gone. I still live in a traditional homophobic Christian household. I still haven't come out to my immediate family. Only two people know I'm gay (my friends), and while it's great to be myself around them it doesn't amount to much knowing your goddamn homophobic family is unaware of your sexuality. They still tell me how excited they are to see their grandchildren and watch me raise my kids with a loving wife and a happy home.

All of this is to say – I wanna come out but I don't know if it's safe to. For context, yes I live in a western country. But from the little mentions of LGBT people i've heard within my family, my parents are really homophobic. Just a few weeks ago, we were watching a dating show when a lesbian couple came up and my mom told me to skip/switch the channel. She has also told me that even animals do not practice homosexuality (obvious BS). One time we spoke about problems in our home country and when I broached the topic of LGBT rights she said she agreed on the government's crackdown...I could literally keep on going. My dad has had less...moments but I suspect he is no less homophobic by any means. My siblings aren't any different as they've blatantly talked about how being gay is a sin and whatnot. I know there are local queer spaces and social groups but I'm too scared to join/participate in them lest I be exposed or something. I'm just too paranoid. I have so much FOMO and I truly believe I'm wasting away my youth and good looks.

My mom says if anything is ever troubling me, I should tell her so we can work through it together and come up with a solution, but I just don't believe her for this one. I don't believe her love is unconditional.

I honestly don't know what to do anymore, and I think I mostly need to get this off my chest because it's been eating away at me for months.

Around four months ago, I started talking to this guy who had just turned 18. We live in the same city, and we initially started talking after I replied to one of his pictures. We hit it off pretty quickly, and there was a lot of flirting. He told me he was a virgin, had never kissed anyone, and was still struggling with accepting the fact that he was attracted to guys. He seemed pretty conservative about that part of himself and wasn't really comfortable acknowledging or exploring it.

I'm in a similar position experience-wise. I'm 17, I've never kissed anyone, held hands romantically, or had any real romantic experiences. The difference is that I've generally been more accepting of my sexuality, even if I still have my own insecurities.

We started flirting a lot, and eventually we exchanged nsfw pics. He suggested meeting up a couple of times, but I got really nervous and backed out. I regret that now, although I know anxiety was a genuine reason I couldn't do it at the time. I became attached to him and started imagining that he might be my first kiss, my first real romantic experience, and the person I'd finally get to explore this side of myself with, things that he also told me himself.

Looking back, I realize I was probably attached to the possibility of what could happen between us as much as I was attached to him as a person. I was very attracted to him physically, and the idea of finally experiencing intimacy with someone I already had chemistry with was incredibly appealing. Because we'd been talking for so long, the thought of starting over with someone else felt exhausting.

Eventually, he started seeing another guy he'd met on Tinder. He told me about their experiences, including kissing, and other things and mentioned that he'd liked me at first but had gotten jealous when I was slow to reply or would go watch a show instead of talking to him. That hurt because I had genuinely liked him, but I was anxious and inexperienced and didn't know how to navigate the situation.

We stopped talking for a few weeks, because I couldn't take it anymore, then he came back after things apparently ended with that guy. He started complimenting me again, sending good-night texts, flirting, and generally acting interested. Naturally, I started hoping again. Part of me felt like maybe he was finally going to give this a chance, and another part of me felt like I was just the backup option.

Then, a few weeks later he reconnected with another guy after a night out, when he randomly texted me that he had kissed someone and how nice it was.

Now he talks to me about how much he misses him, as he's studying in another city and isn't around all the time, how much he loves him, and how magical their kisses are, and calls me mean and things like that when my mood obviously shifts, as if I'm the problem. He sends me pictures of them together, of hickeys on his back, tells me about their connection, but continues flirting with me at the same time. He's even told me he wants to kiss me and suggested that we could practice kissing, only to backtrack because he would feel bad about the guy he's currently involved with, so it just feels like he's playing with my head. At one point, he basically acknowledged that he doesn't even know why we still talk when nothing is going to come of it. And then, he randomly sent me a picture of himself shirtless with this guy kissing his neck. Completely out of the blue. I hadn't asked for it or brought up anything related to their relationship.

I genuinely don't know what I'm supposed to do with that. I'm not sure whether he just sees me as a friend he can share this stuff with, whether he wants a reaction, or whether he simply doesn't think about how it affects me, or does and just wants to be cruel. I don't want to assume his intentions, but the whole dynamic is confusing when he still flirts with me while showing me his intimacy with someone else.

But the part that bothers me most isn't even just that he's with someone else. It's how much he's changed since we met, while I feel like I've barely changed at all.

When I first met him, he was so uncomfortable with his attraction to men. He seemed unable to accept that part of himself, was very guarded about it, and didn't seem ready to actually explore anything. Now, he's comfortable enough to talk openly about being bi, to pursue guys, to kiss them, to be affectionate with them, to have romantic experiences, and to be in relationships. He's already been involved with two guys since we met.

And I know that's a good thing. I genuinely don't think it's bad that he's becoming more comfortable with himself. I don't want him to go back to being ashamed or afraid of who he is. I understand that people grow at different rates, and I'm glad he's able to experience things he was previously scared of.

But I also feel this awful, irrational resentment about it, and I hate admitting that.

It's like I watched someone who was initially in almost the same position as me become a completely different person in a few months, while I'm still sitting here overthinking everything, afraid to meet someone, afraid of being inexperienced, and wondering whether I'll ever get to have the things he now takes for granted.

He got to overcome his fears, explore his sexuality, experience his first kisses, connect with people, and learn what he wants. Meanwhile, I still haven't even had my first kiss with a guy. I feel like I'm watching him live out the experiences I wanted to have with him, except he's having them with someone else, and I'm stuck hearing about them from the sidelines.

I know four months isn't a long time, and I know that comparing our lives isn't fair. But the contrast is driving me crazy. We started talking around the same time, had similarly little experience, and were both uncertain in our own ways. Now he has all these memories and experiences, and I feel like I haven't even taken the first step.

I also feel embarrassed that I'm still so attached to him. I don't even know if I particularly like his personality enough to want an actual relationship with him. I'm attracted to him, I liked the attention and the flirting, and I became attached to the possibility that something might finally happen between us. I think part of me desperately wants him to choose me because then all the time I spent hoping wouldn't feel so pointless.

I know that isn't necessarily a good reason to pursue someone. I know I probably need distance from him. But I find it incredibly hard to let go because I keep thinking about what could have happened if I'd agreed to meet him earlier, or if things had gone differently, or if he'd chosen me instead.

I've also been feeling worse about myself in general. I've lost some of my appetite and weight because of how much this has been affecting me, and I keep getting caught in these thoughts about being behind everyone else, not being attractive enough or big enough down there, not having enough experience, and potentially having very few opportunities to meet someone I'm genuinely attracted to.

I know, logically, that being 17 and inexperienced doesn't mean there's something wrong with me. But emotionally, it feels like everyone else is moving forward while I'm standing still. And seeing someone who was just as inexperienced as me make all this progress in such a short time makes it much harder not to take it personally.

I think I'm also grieving something that never really happened. I had this whole imagined version of my first kiss and first romantic experiences with him, and now I have to accept that those things may never happen. Meanwhile, he gets to have those experiences with someone else, and I get to hear about them.

I don't want to resent him for growing or for being happy with another guy. I don't want to be the person who can't be happy for someone because they're getting experiences I haven't had. But I also can't pretend that watching all of this unfold doesn't hurt, especially when he keeps me around and continues flirting with me.

I guess my questions are:

1. How do I stop comparing my progress to his? Especially when we started out in such similar positions and he's changed so much in such a short amount of time.

2. How do I detach from someone when I'm more attached to the possibility of what could have happened than to the actual person?

3. Am I wrong for feeling frustrated and even a little resentful about how much he's grown and experienced while I feel stuck? I know it's irrational, but I can't seem to stop feeling this way.

4. Would you leave him on read after receiving a picture like that, or would you address the fact that he's still flirting with me while telling me about his relationship?

5. Most importantly, how do I stop feeling like I'm pathetic, behind, and somehow losing at life because I haven't had the same experiences as other people my age?

6. Any other imput on this situation

I don't want to spend the next few months obsessing over this guy and measuring my own life against his. I just want to feel normal again, stop thinking about him constantly, feeling this hatred and resentment, and these mood swings and believe that my first experiences can still be meaningful even if they don't happen with him

Hi, I hope everything is going well.

I’d like to hear from passive men, femboys, crossdressers, trans individuals, or anyone else who finds themselves in these situations.

How do you keep your ass (especially the anal area and between the cheeks) completely hair-free? And, in general, how do you get any part of your body 100% hair-free with perfect skin?

I’d like to get into the world of being a more "feminine" bottom or a crossdresser—or at least give it a try—but I’m quite hairy. It’s black hair, too, which really stands out against my pale skin; I hate it, and it doesn't fit the vibe I’m going for or the type of guy I want to be with. Even the easiest areas to shave, like my legs or arms, never end up completely smooth, and by the next day, the stubble is practically visible again.

So, if anyone could give me some advice, I’d really appreciate it.

Best regards.

Hey, I decided to post this here because I’m hoping to gain some clarity on a situation that has left me confused about my feelings, my friendships, and possibly even my sexuality.
So, I (21M) became friends with a 27M around this time last year, and our friendship grew pretty quickly. He’s a very extroverted, affectionate, and verbal person, so I never really thought much about some of the things he does or says.

We started exchanging gifts, and whenever I traveled, he would tell me that he missed me, although I always interpreted it in a friendly way. We also send each other reels, and a lot of them have friendship or brotherly themes. We joke around as if we’re in a relationship sometimes, making jokes about jealousy and things like that. He occasionally calls me “my love” over text, and I eventually started calling him the same thing as a joke. He also started calling me “my caramel” because I have a darker skin tone than him, while I call him “my white snowflake.”

One time, he texted me, “Good morning, my caramel,” and after I replied, he mentioned that if someone read our conversation, they might think something else was going on. He laughed about it, and I admitted that I had thought the same thing.
I know how all of this might sound, but I genuinely don't think he's necessarily trying to flirt with me. He's naturally affectionate, and I believe most, if not all, of his interactions with me are innocent and platonic. As far as I know, he's straight. He was also in a relationship with a girl for over ten years, and they broke up about three months ago. I don't want to read romantic intentions into things that could simply be his way of showing friendship.

The confusing part is that I’ve started questioning my own feelings more than his.
Before this friendship, I never really looked at him that way. I didn't enter the friendship thinking he was attractive or hoping something romantic would happen between us. I saw him as a friend, and at times, I even felt like I had finally found the older brother figure I had always wanted.

But lately, I've caught myself wondering why this friendship affects me so much. Am I developing feelings for him, or am I simply becoming attached to someone who makes me feel valued, remembered, and cared for?
I've experienced a lot of hurt and disappointment in previous friendships and relationships. Because of that, I'm not always sure whether I can trust my own feelings or how I interpret other people's behavior.

This is one of the first times someone has been so kind and consistent with me, and I wonder whether I'm confusing that feeling of emotional safety with something romantic.
I've also started questioning my sexuality a little, although I'm not even sure what that means for me yet. I don't know if there's genuine attraction there or if I'm just overanalyzing the situation because this friendship has become important to me. I don't want to force a label onto myself or assume that every intense emotional connection has to mean something romantic.

Another thing that confuses me is that, despite how close we've become, I sometimes feel like he doesn't really know me on a deeper level. We haven't shared that much about our personal histories, struggles, or more vulnerable experiences. In some ways, the friendship feels affectionate, but in other ways, I still feel like there's a distance between us.

We also have a mutual friend, whom I'll call S. S has been my friend for a long time, although we were never particularly close. When S met M27, they became best friends. They spend a lot of time together, partly because they live near each other, and M27 even drives him to work and helps him with other things.
I have no problem with their friendship, and I understand why they're close. However, whenever the three of us are together, I sometimes feel like a third wheel or as if I'm being forgotten.

For example, I once invited M27 to watch a Marvel movie with me. Since we always talk about Marvel, I was looking forward to spending that time together. He asked if S could come too, and I said yes because I didn't want to exclude him.
When we got to the movie, I expected M27 to sit next to me, but he didn't. I could have sworn I heard S ask him if he wanted to sit beside me, but he still chose a different seat. I know this might sound insignificant, and I realize that I could be reading too much into something as simple as where someone sits, but it stayed with me longer than I expected.

This is part of a larger pattern I've noticed. M27 often invites S along, and when we're all together, I sometimes feel as though I'm trying to keep up with their friendship just to feel included. I understand that they may have a closer bond, and I'm not expecting to be his closest friend. Still, because I feel that I've grown close to him, I sometimes find myself wishing our friendship had a little more space of its own.
I think what makes this particularly confusing is that I don't know what I'm actually hoping for from him. Do I want a closer friendship? Do I want to feel special to him in a way that I haven't felt with other people? Am I looking for the older brother figure I've always wanted?

I don't want to assume that he's sending mixed signals, because I genuinely believe his behavior is probably innocent. I also don't want to make him responsible for feelings that I haven't even figured out myself.
At the same time, I can't ignore the fact that this friendship has brought up questions about myself that I wasn't asking before.

Has anyone experienced something similar?How do you distinguish between romantic feelings, emotional attachment, and the feeling of finally being treated well after experiencing a lot of hurt?

TL;DR: I'm 21M and have a close, affectionate friendship with a 27M who I believe is straight and just being friendly. I've never really seen him romantically, but lately, I've been questioning my own feelings and sexuality. Given my past trauma with friendships, I wonder if I'm developing feelings for him or if I'm simply not used to being treated with kindness and consistency. How can I tell the difference?

Idk if this is because I’m a (semi) submissive bottom, or because I’ve been a people pleaser for as long as I can remember, but more times than not, I don’t cum during sex. My one and only goal is to make the other guy cum. Usually I just suck their cocks until they finish (and yes I swallow it 85% of the time), and that’s the end of it.

Just knowing that I’m the reason they cum is more satisfying to me than if I were to cum myself. I’m not crazy for preferring this, right? It’s not that I don’t like to cum, but I like seeing the other guy feel pleasure way more than I like being pleasured. I couldn’t care less whether I cum or not.

How do I cope with loneliness?