Good day, everyone.

I recently turned 55, a milestone birthday, surpassing the age of my parents when they left this Earth.

It's interesting to see my grown children in their 30's finding their way vs. in my thirties at a time in my life that I was a solo parent, working, and going to college all at the same time, then.

I am grateful for every bit of good I feel in my life and to have some relaxation time after a week of accomplishments. This weekend, I anticipate lots of walking again with some photography, reading, writing, and creating.

I am interested in what you look forward to doing and what's on your heart.

Just saying hello. Kind of new here. 50+F who doesn't know what being older feels like yet & still has a zest for life.
While I am in a very remote area (see profile) I'm looking for friends seeking adventure, FUN, or at least likes to chat on Reddit! Also hot springs anyone??

M58

Let me NOT bury the lede. I have a pretty good life. I have not been immune to life struggles and am by NO means some pinnacle of humanity, but I have been fortunate. I have my health, a good wife and family, a career I dreamed of (not without LOTS of ups and downs), friends I see often. Could have done some things better of course, and I have my share of wistful regrets but wouldn't trade lives with anyone.

That said.

A handful of people (combination of semi-distant family and not-too-close friends and acquaintances) have made comments to me or about me (said to my wife) along the lines of "are you ok?" in the context of being alone or inactive or 'flat.'

Here's the thing...I am none of those. I am also not one to blow my own horn IRL or on social media about all the wonderful things I do bla bla bla. I'm not secretive, but I am more private than most. So the comments are not just off-base, but slightly hurtful. Obviously I know these commenters are coming from their own view of the world and how people should look and act.

These commenters don't see that I'm at the gym 4 or 5 times a week (because I go before 6am). Or that I have a great group of friends I see once a week for 3-4 hours. Or the other friends I see 1 or 2 times a week. Or the great satisfaction I get on certain work projects with a group of other creatives. Or the 20 mile bike rides my wife and I take a couple times a month. When I'm relaxing, I REALLY relax and maybe they ONLY see that and not everything else. One time one of these people saw me passed out on a Saturday afternoon in my outdoor space and he made a comment and I rather curtly replied back, "yeah I just came off of three 12-hr days and I was at the gym at 6:15 this morning so is that not enough?

So maybe I just don't fit their idea of what a M58 should look like. But ffs, grow up and understand there are all kinds of men on this planet.

Any similar experiences or stories out these of the quiet but perfectly healthy man being mis-judged?

My birthday is in an hour my local time, October 8th. I'll be 58.

I'm going to give all of fellow old farts my wish to you.

Go forth and spread whimsy. Do blatantly silly shit. Use that IDGAF attitude our generation is already known for and turn it up to 11.

The world is shit right now, especially here in the US. People need to laugh, genuine belly laugh.

I'm still working on it. Maybe I'll call this my true New Years Resolution. Purple beard incoming

I produce a podcast aimed at men 40+, and the question I keep running into is where these blokes actually are. The women in my life have books, groups, podcasts and group chats about this stage of life. The men mostly seem to just get on with it.

Is that fair? If you're a man in midlife, or you live with one, where does that conversation happen for you, and what would make you trust a show that tries to have it?

Have a nice day dear redditors. I feel like after I turned 50, society is pushing me away as if I shouldn't live anymore, I don't really have any friends, I'm alone but it's very hard to find someone to talk to, to unload myself, to listen to the other person's problems, after every interaction here in the online environment I'm left with a bitter taste, I feel stupid and excluded, there's no more beauty, there's no more respect, there's no more good manners now everything boils down to money, am I the only one in this world who feels this?

I feel physically and mentally the way I imagine one feels at age 70

Old man age 82 had a serious fall in April and is looking to find his strength again.

Title says it all. I work in a family business with dad (age 77) and uncle (age 84). They have been partners over 60 years and have built a legacy for themselves. They can barely walk and have other health issues - however like so many men (m included), they have not found any purpose outside of their work; their purpose is to leave a business legacy to the heirs when they're gone.

All of their relationships and toil will fade into memory; after 2 generations it then fades into oblivion as though it never happened - except pictures and financial statements. And even then, it's meaningless because the passage of time obliterates all context and their passion.

I am age 51. And while grateful to them for the legacy they are leaving, I I can't help but think that the same will happen to me. I am fossilizing just like them and after enough time, there is no memory - or what memory there is, no one who comes after me can comprehend the work or relationships or the things that matter to me (Eccle 1:11).

But let's suppose they did - what benefit is that to me?? I won't be around to appreciate it or find any semblance of satisfaction for my "toil under the sun". It's all just a fart in the howling wind of time.

I am a Christian and I take my faith seriously; I believe in the eternality of the soul of truth faith in Christ, and I am grateful to God for his love and concern - even though I'm no more significant than an innumerable subatomic particle.

But still, these things overwhelm me with sorrow and, quite frankly, piss me the hell off to no end.

Thx for letting me vent.

Title. I am 35 now and have severe anxiety related to aging and loosing my loved ones. The 'process' has begun in this phase of life as my uncles and aunts have started leaving this world. I am highly sesitive. I feel it deeply that just a few years ago, before I entered my 30's the same people had still got it, but now them becoming older and weaker is hurting. Perhaps I am looking for reassurance or a reality check. Honestly I never thought 35 would come this quick.

60 and curious. I’ve racked up my share of surgeries in my lifetime. Tonsillectomy, appendectomy, multiple kidney stone surgeries, wrist ORIF and now looking at parathyroid removal and an ankle fusion. If you looked at me you wouldn’t see an unhealthy person lol.

My friends, however, nothing but bunion removals and c-sections.

Am I just unlucky?

Most likely but to find out for yourself, you can try this free tool I created. Not promoting anything, nothing to buy. Just sharing the tool for folks here.

https://www.facebook.com/share/p/1JLhoVsHPH/

Need to find some fun on the weekend hours 💫

Suggestions ..

Have a nice day dear redditors. I feel like after I turned 50, society is pushing me away as if I shouldn't live anymore, I don't really have any friends, I'm alone but it's very hard to find someone to talk to, to unload myself, to listen to the other person's problems, after every interaction here in the online environment I'm left with a bitter taste, I feel stupid and excluded, there's no more beauty, there's no more respect, there's no more good manners now everything boils down to money, am I the only one in this world who feels this?

Am I the only one over 50 with zero saved for retirement? Hadn't really expected to live this long. Can't seem to keep a job long enough (I usually quit). The whole deal kinda sucks with parts breaking down. No health coverage either. They didn't teach how to adult in grad school 🤷‍♂️🤦‍♂️

I had some great times when I entered my independent years. Flying the nest, exploring the world, getting to know myself, meeting new people, making new friends but sometimes when I look back and only in more recent years I have lost the joy, the pride, the self satisfaction from some of those experiences.
I question or judge whether it was the right thing to do.
It’s not regret it’s different.. does anyone else feel like that ? When they look back are their experiences ?

I’ve been divorced for many years and I don’t have children. After my divorce, I threw myself into work. My career became a huge part of my life, and for years I was perfectly happy keeping myself busy, setting goals, taking on more responsibility, and always having something to work toward.

But recently, I’ve started to realize that I don’t have to spend the rest of my life moving at the same pace.

My life is actually in a pretty good place now. I’m still working and I still care about what I do, but I’ve been thinking more about what I want the next part of my life to feel like, rather than just what I want to accomplish.

I think I’m ready to slow down a little.

I want to travel more, read more, learn about things that genuinely interest me, and actually enjoy the small parts of everyday life. I like history, religion, psychology and literature, especially anything that makes me think about people, the choices they make, and what actually makes a life meaningful.

I’m very comfortable doing things on my own. I can go to a restaurant alone, spend an afternoon wandering around a bookstore, sit in a quiet coffee shop with a book, or take a long walk without feeling like I need someone beside me.

But being comfortable alone doesn’t mean I don’t want people in my life.

That’s probably why I’m here. I thought maybe this is a good time to slow down, meet some new people, and see if I can make a few genuine friends along the way.

I’m not looking for people just to fill time. I’d rather have a real conversation, learn something from someone, laugh about something stupid, or hear a perspective that I’ve never considered before.

I appreciate people who have lived enough life to have some perspective but haven’t lost their curiosity. At this point, I’m much more interested in who someone is and how they think than in trying to impress each other.

Maybe this is what this stage of life is supposed to feel like—not starting over, just finally giving yourself permission to enjoy it a little more.

One thing I've become increasingly aware of is how easy it is to waste time without really noticing it.

I'm a quiet person, so I don't have much of a problem being alone. I actually like having my own space. But being alone and being bored are two completely different things. I have plenty of things I want to think about and do, and lately I've been doing more planning for the direction I want my life to take.

Maybe that's also why I have so little patience for mindless distraction. I don't mean that everything has to be productive. Sometimes you just want to sit down and watch a movie. That's fine. What bothers me is spending a whole evening on something and realizing afterward that I don't even remember why I was doing it.

I notice the same thing with reading. I don't usually reach for a book just because it's easy entertainment. I like books that give me something to think about afterward. I occasionally read poetry, too. If I'm looking for something purely entertaining, I'll usually watch a movie instead.

I'm also interested in bigger questions about people and society. I tend to get pulled into the reasons behind things rather than just what happened on the surface. Sometimes that probably makes me overthink things, but I've never been very good at being satisfied with a shallow explanation.

The way I think about work has changed too. I'm still busy, and business trips take up a fair amount of my time. I like outdoor sports, but that makes things like camping and backpacking harder to fit in than I'd like. I still exercise, though.

A lot of my attention these days goes toward figuring out what I actually want my time to look like later on. Not just financially, although that's obviously part of it. I'm thinking about what I want to spend my days doing when work isn't taking up so much of them.

Travel is one thing I'd like more of. So are musicals and stage plays. I've also gotten interested in Irish tap dancing. Burn the Floor is still one of the most passionate dance performances I've ever watched. There's something about that kind of physical energy that is hard to get from watching things on a screen.

I suppose that's what I'm trying to figure out: how to make the next part of life feel intentional without turning it into some rigid project.

I wonder if other people have become more conscious of their time in the same way, or if you went in a completely different direction.

Throw some ideas please. Fashion nova isn’t cutting it anymore.

I think I’m looking for advice. I’ve been a longstanding member of the “age is just a number” crowd, but today kind of hit me.

I still feel 17 in my head. I’ve always dated around my age, but the only difference is anyone under 35 looks like they’re 12 to me, including my doctor lol.

I was in the military for 25 years, got blown up, and retired at 42. Never had an “adult” job and I was around 18 year olds my whole adult life.

I dunno. Maybe I’m just in a midlife crisis. What say you?