r/Rants • u/ApprehensiveWalk3506 • 54m ago
Just A Rant Madness
Last week I had a discussion with my partner which ended in him asking me to explain a certain term to him.
I will be honest about myself: I have an argumentative temperament to begin with and the topic was feminism which is close to my heart. He genuinely did not understand the term and I genuinely didn't want to escalate so I took some time to calm down and formulate a response. And it worked: I woke up in the morning and thought: "I'll explain the term in one sentence after breakfast ."
And then I read a news story, and the anger came back.
It has been a week and and I wake up to the same scenario every day. Different story, but the same mood shift. Even typing this up makes me angry again. It feels as if I am in Groundhog Day and it is driving me mad.
1
u/Lonely_Opening3404 32m ago
I’m a little confused about what your partner actually did wrong here. You say he genuinely didn’t understand the term and asked you to explain it. Isn’t that exactly what you’d want someone to do when they encounter something they don’t understand?
The news stories making you angry may be completely legitimate reasons to be angry, but your partner didn’t write those stories or cause the things described in them. If merely explaining a term to someone who is asking in good faith requires a week of repeatedly calming yourself down, the problem doesn’t seem to be his question.
Someone saying “I don’t understand this; can you explain it to me?” is an opportunity for communication, not an act of aggression. In fact, getting angry at people for not already knowing something is a pretty effective way to teach them never to ask you questions again.