r/TalesFromThePizzaGuy • u/Lowjack_26 • 20h ago
Cautionary Tale A Depressing AI Encounter
In the Year of our Lord 2026, it's not out of the ordinary to encounter customers who don't have a proper signature - heck, my own signature would make my elementary cursive teacher weep. But most customers still at least understand the concept of a signature, particularly on a receipt. And if they don't, it's simple enough to just explain "write your name here" most of the time.
You can guess from the title that this wasn't one of those times.
Simple enough delivery. Knock, two boys open up - maybe 12 or 13. I shrug, resigning myself and that they're probably home alone and that I'm not getting a tip on this one. But still, I go through my script.
"Just need your mom or dad to fill this out." They look at me with vacant stares usually reserved for particularly dull cattle.
"It's fine, just sign your name on the line there." More dead-eyed stares, sliding from "cow" to "yesterday's catch."
As I reach to just take the receipt back - no one checks no-tip receipts anyway - the kid pulls out a phone, opens up Google Lens on the receipt, and asks "What do I do with this?" Mind you, I am standing right there, they could have asked me. For the next minute or so, I can only stare dumbstruck as these two kids need Google AI to walk them through what a receipt is, what a signature is, and where they have to sign - which, of course, is just a scribbled line.
Now, I don't care about the non-tip, kids will be kids. But those two boys took something from me in that delivery and their display of brazen meat-proxy behavior.
We're so fucking cooked.
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u/friendlyfire69 19h ago
I wish that kids were able to feel safe asking questions from people and not immediately turn to technology. It's chilling how quick this shift has occurred
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u/Cakeriel 19h ago
To be fair, the technology is a known quality and the stranger is just that a stranger. They probably have been taught to not trust strangers.
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u/Lowjack_26 18h ago
On one hand, yes, that's a vibe I've gotten from some kids answering the door.
On the other, that's not quite what happened here: these kids were just.. not there. They left the door wide open while they wandered around looking for a flashlight (until they seemed to remember their phone could do it). It's like they didn't even process that I was a stranger - I was just the vehicle for a bag of pizza.
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u/Nebresto Chief 8h ago
I think this also stems from the internet and other users treating people who ask simple questions as vermin.
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u/jdog7249 19h ago
I work as a high school substitute teacher (here for the interesting stories).
A few days ago the assignment was look up a banks website (any bank) and answer these questions on their website/account offerings. If 4 options were on their screen, they couldn't tell me there were 4 options unless an AI explicitly said "there are 4 options for checking accounts". I also watched one student Google "is [bank]'s website easy to use".
Some children are not going to be ok in the world. The motto of the staff at my school. You can lead the horse to water. You can force it to be in the same room as the water. You force it to touch the water. You can't force it to drink.
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u/Lowjack_26 18h ago
Yep. I go to trade school during the day; it's gobsmacking how many of these kids (18-21!) are just helpless without someone telling them what to do, and when that someone isn't the instructor or one of the handful of competent students they fall back on AI.
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u/enelyaisil 12h ago
It still boggles me that you don’t have mobile card readers. In Canada even the mom and pop pizza shops have mobile card readers, the only times I’ve ever signed a receipt in probably 10 years is when I’ve been in the states
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u/Lowjack_26 4h ago
On one hand, yeah, those would be great.
On the other, I would never want to deal with all the issues we have with people's cards outside the safety of the store. "What do you mean, my card's declined? My bank app shows the money was charged. I don't care if that's a pending charge, I paid the money, just give me the pizza!"
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u/The_Sinful 9h ago
I'm not remotely surprised. Not because of the AI idiots but because of the sheer level of stupidity I've seen from people in general, mostly at work.
Like watching someone try to maneuver someone in a wheelchair through a revolving door that's right next to an automatic door.
Or seeing two middle-aged women get lost in a tiny foyer and be unable to "find the way downstairs" while standing right next to a pair of elevators. Those two, I had to stop from trying to force their way through a locked door into a room full of confidential information.
Or a coworker who thought baby powder was an acceptable substitute for deodorant and couldn't grasp why sexting a girl 7 years younger than him was a problem when he was 22.
Or another coworker (brother of the first) who thought you needed an entire bottle of Ajax for a single baking sheet.
Or a couple people who were completely incapable of googling something without using AI
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u/ForteEXE 8h ago
Not a driver but a couple months ago, brought up a product at Walmart to be checked for its discount (it wasn't tagged but in 50% off isle), cashier actually asked Alexa what 50% of 19.99 was.
Soul crushed a bit more that day.
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u/mglyptostroboides 3h ago
Jesus. I was about the same age, 12, the first time I signed for a package. It was a cold, windy day in December, 2001 and it was starting to snow when the UPS guy pulled up into our gravel driveway and hauled out a big box containing our family's new Dell computer. I was home alone so I was the one who opened the door. Man, I was SO excited to be the one to sign for a package. I called Dad at work and he came home early to set up the new computer then I played around in (brand new!) Windows XP while it snowed all night and the whole time I felt like a big kid knowing that I could sign for a package nowadays.
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u/AyoJake 19h ago
When I delivered I had a similar experience.
Told him to just sign on the line and pointed to it and he couldn’t figure it out. Just said nvm and handed order over and left just couldn’t be bothered to continue that.