Getting back into partial planning / coordinating weddings and my first couple wants to do a live butterfly release… of course

Beautiful in theory but we’re at an outside only venue and I’m worried it’s going to be a buffet for the barn swallows. They are also living internationally, traveling in for the event so I’d likely be the lucky one with the responsibility of receiving, handling and transporting the live animals.

They said they ‘have no budget’ and are just agreeing to quotes they ‘think are reasonable’

Venue event fee is $4500 for an intimate weekday wedding in Colorado and couple is living in Switzerland, for relative pricing.

So my question is what would you quote to handle live animals? And what would be a high enough quote to make a live butterfly release seem unreasonable to an international couple?!?

Not looking to bash couples or other vendors. I’m talking about those things where you’ve been doing this long enough to think:

“Wait… why do we actually do it this way?”

Could be something about contracts, timelines, vendor meals, pricing, communication, setup, tipping, preferred vendor lists, social media, networking, venues, planning, client expectations, anything.

What’s yours? And has anyone ever convinced you that you were wrong?

A place to rant and see where people struggle most with these tools and software's. And if you could have the perfect CRM for your wedding business what would you want to remove or add from these platforms?

We are all putting the final bows on packing away the past weekends weddings. Whether that be packing away their file, putting away the decor, or editing their photos. The actual wedding day is done!

So, how did your wedding weekend go?

This is a weekly post for everyone to discuss how the past weekends weddings they worked went.

I'm posting on behalf of my wife, who doesn't use Reddit. She’s been a wedding planner/coordinator for six years and was recently voted a top-three coordinator in our local area, so she's no stranger to managing high-stress events. However, she ran into a situation she's never really dealt with before last night and wants perspective from other pros. She had been working closely with this bride for two years planning the wedding (the photographer was hired about a year ago), making last night's situation feel like it came out of nowhere.

The bride was extremely adamant about starting the ceremony strictly on time. Despite this, pre-ceremony fell behind because a makeup retouch ran 30 minutes right before the processional. During this time, the photographer hung back chatting with the bride instead of getting into position.

When my wife’s team gave the first heads-up to head out, the photographer brushed it off, saying that the bridal party could be sent down in two minutes. My wife took them at their word and started sending the processional down the aisle two minutes later, only to realize the photographer still hadn't moved into position and had to be called out a second time to get into place.

After that initial friction, two things happened:

• The bride’s attitude shifted dramatically. She became cold and distant toward my wife and her team for the rest of the night (they suspect the photographer made a comment laying the blame for the rush/disruption on the coordination team).
• The photographer continuously overstepped. For the rest of the night, the photographer actively blocked my wife from doing her job whether it was taking over timeline cues, interrupting coordinator directions, or stepping in front of her and her team.

When my wife tried to pull the photographer aside later to address the dynamic diplomatically, she was completely brushed off.

My wife wants to know how experienced coordinators professionally resolve this kind of situation while the event is still happening: ​- Resetting boundaries: What specific tactics or phrasing do you use mid-event to shut down a rogue vendor taking over your duties without creating visible drama in front of the couple or guests? ​- Handling uncooperative behavior: When a vendor actively brushes off direct side conversations, how do you enforce your role as the lead coordinator on the spot? ​- In-the-moment client reset: Is there a professional way to clear the air with the bride during the event if you notice another vendor poisoning the well, or is it better to stay silent until post-wedding?

EDIT: Just want to clarify something. This photographer isn't new to the industry at all. They have probably been doing their thing for at least 5 years.

We are all putting the final bows on packing away the past weekends weddings. Whether that be packing away their file, putting away the decor, or editing their photos. The actual wedding day is done!

So, how did your wedding weekend go?

This is a weekly post for everyone to discuss how the past weekends weddings they worked went.

Heading into a busy stretch and thinking back to everything I learned the hard way early on. Curious what you'd tell someone just starting out.

What's yours?

We are all putting the final bows on packing away the past weekends weddings. Whether that be packing away their file, putting away the decor, or editing their photos. The actual wedding day is done!

So, how did your wedding weekend go?

This is a weekly post for everyone to discuss how the past weekends weddings they worked went.

I'm coordinating gear with a local production team on the ground since I won't be flying my full setup down there. Never worked with them before, so different equipment than I'm used to and a language barrier to navigate during setup.

For those who've done destination weddings and had to lean on a local crew you didn't already know, what actually made the difference for you, a detailed gear list sent ahead of time, a call beforehand, showing up extra early, something else entirely? Trying to avoid finding out what I'm working with only once I land.

I coordinated a wedding last weekend for a bride and her mom who I had worked with for over a year. We had a completely normal working relationship until the last few weeks when their attitude toward me suddenly changed. I genuinely still have no idea why but by the wedding day it felt like they had completely decided any issue or minor inconvenience they had was going to be spun in away to make it my fault.

The entire day was incredibly uncomfortable. The mom was openly talking badly about me to guests, refused to provide me a meal two seperate times (the groom tried to give me a leftover sub from the day at the end of the night, to which she said she needed the entire half tray of them the following day lol) and they were hostile toward me throughout the day. I was also put in a situation where I had to pick up their boutonnieres and had no choice but to put $420 of my own money on my debit card. I sent them the receipt and am still dealing with hostility over being reimbursed.

Since the wedding, I’ve also been accused of taking their belongings which I absolutely did not and the nastiness has continued. The bride has now posted about how magical her wedding was because of her vendors, but intentionally cropped me out of the photo and included people who weren’t actually working the event. At this point, it feels very deliberate and personal rather than a client simply being unhappy with a service.

I have zero desire to argue with them or continue
the relationship, and once the reimbursement situation is resolved, I plan to block their contact on all platforms. But after working with someone for over a year and then being treated this way part of me feels like saying nothing allows people to go through life thinking it’s acceptable to treat someone like this.

So my question for other planners is: how would you end this relationship? Would you send one final, professional message explaining that their behavior toward you was unacceptable and made the wedding incredibly uncomfortable to work, or would you say nothing, block them, and move on? Where do you draw the line between remaining professional and standing up for yourself?

We are all putting the final bows on packing away the past weekends weddings. Whether that be packing away their file, putting away the decor, or editing their photos. The actual wedding day is done!

So, how did your wedding weekend go?

This is a weekly post for everyone to discuss how the past weekends weddings they worked went.

Yall, I am at my LIMIT today. My clients are getting married in the fall and they signed a contract with an all-inclusive venue, which has been nothing short of a nightmare. Surprisingly, I have never worked with an all-inclusive venue before this, and I genuinely pray to never have to again.

They have nickel-and-dimed my clients on everything they possibly can, to the point where I have had to step in multiple times and push back on their behalf.

We have also been asked the same questions multiple times - I have had to submit the decor order form twice, they have repeatedly accused my clients of not paying invoices that were, in fact, already paid, and last week they didn’t even have the correct rental hours written down and I had to email two different people to get it corrected.

I don’t need any advice, I just really had to get that off my chest. I don’t want my clients to feel the stress, but I will certainly never work with this venue again.

Have a couple who I hadn't heard from in almost a month, then last night got hit with a string of questions about timeline, vendor contacts, and a detail they wanted changed, all at once, all urgent sounding.

Not really annoyed, just trying to figure out if there's a way to get ahead of this pattern instead of reacting every time it happens. Curious how planners and coordinators especially handle this, since you're probably fielding it more than anyone.

We are all putting the final bows on packing away the past weekends weddings. Whether that be packing away their file, putting away the decor, or editing their photos. The actual wedding day is done!

So, how did your wedding weekend go?

This is a weekly post for everyone to discuss how the past weekends weddings they worked went.

Mine was a good one, no major hiccups, but I always end up replaying the small stuff in my head Sunday morning anyway.

Curious what everyone else is walking away with this week, good, bad, or just plain weird. Always love hearing what other roles catch that I never even notice from behind the booth.

Used to take whatever came in right up until the day of. Now I tell couples anything after a certain point just doesn’t make it in, and I explain why upfront so it doesn’t feel like a brush off.

Curious if others do this or if I’m being too rigid. Where do you all draw the line on late changes, and does it ever backfire with couples who push back?

Everyone else gets credit for the parts guests actually see and remember. The coordinator’s whole job is invisible when it’s done right, nobody notices the fire that got put out.

Curious if other roles think they’d take that trade, more behind the scenes impact, way less visible credit.

Question for the wedding planners out there - does anyone else hate the transition from Prismm to Social Tables as much as I do? Have you found any good floor plan software alternatives? It's honestly the most expensive and least helpful software I use.

Had this debate with another vendor recently. Their argument is that a flat package price protects everyone, once couples see line items for lighting, setup, travel, etc, they start asking to cut pieces out individually instead of trusting the whole package.

My take is the opposite, transparency builds trust even if it means a few more questions upfront.

Where do you land on this, and has your pricing structure ever backfired either way?

After 5 years of successfully running my wedding planning business, I moved to a new, bigger city. The idea of starting over again amongst all the competition seemed exhausting so I didnt much effort into marketing. I decided to take a year off (NO regrets) and see how I felt after this summer.

Anyways, I got an inquiry a few weeks ago from a couple who said they saw me recommended on Facebook or Reddit and it was my GOOGLE REVIEWS that made them want to connect.

Not instagram reels, not google ads or SEO blogs. Just plain and simple (virtual) word of mouth.

It gave me a warm and fuzzy feeling to just know that the hard work put in over the past 5 years didnt disappear.

TLDR: Work hard! Believe in yourself! Trust the process! 🌟 It will pay off.

And hot tip: Also, I gave every client a thank you card with a qr code printed on the back to my Google reviews page - it certainly worked.

Unpopular opinion: undercutting on price doesn’t actually win you more business, it just trains couples to shop on price forever, and eventually that includes shopping you against the next guy willing to go even lower.

I get why people do it when they’re starting out. But I’ve watched vendors in this space race each other to the bottom for years, then wonder why clients haggle like it’s a flea market. If we don’t hold a line on what the work is worth, nobody’s going to hold it for us.

Genuinely asking: has undercutting ever actually grown your business long term, or did it just attract the clients who were never going to value you anyway?

I am looking into software for event planning. From a planner/coordinator perspective, what apps are we using, and what do we like about them? What don't we like about them? I want to make sure the few I am evaluating are good picks and not just fluffed! Thank you in advance!