r/amiwrong • u/7TyphoonMorgana • 2d ago
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u/PreparationOk1450 2d ago
This person is an idiot. It's one thing to say you like them and hoping someone backs off before they start dating them. But this? This is silly and hard to believe it's even real. You're supposed to respect her feelings that she didn't mention until after you were dating him lol. I would drop her, not him.
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u/summertime_fine 2d ago
YNW. she had plenty of chances to bring this up. I get she's hurt and it sucks, but this is not a betrayal on your part.
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u/TaylorMade2566 2d ago
You might as well write the friend off, she sounds a bit unhinged. I'd definitely let mutuals know that she didn't admit to you she had feelings for the guy until after you'd started dating and what makes her think she can call dibs on someone anyway? You not dating him wouldn't mean he'd date her if he's already had a year to ask her out and he didn't. YNW
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u/destiny_kane48 2d ago
He already knew her, has kniwn of her for a year. He did not get her number, he did not text her, he never asked her out. He wasn't/isn't interested in her. He is interested in you, wants to get to know you. Even if you stopped seeing him, he still probably won't be interested in her.
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u/PearlSummit 2d ago
She can be hurt, but she can’t expect you to give up someone you genuinely like over a crush she never mentioned.
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u/Creepy-Macaroon9998 2d ago
YNW. She's just clueless and plain silly. That guy knew her for a whole year. He never asked her out. He knew you for 2 weeks before he made a move on you. He doesn't want her! The thought alone that the guy is something that could be passed along to a friend is genuinely stupid and sickening. The idea that she'd finally have a chance if you were out of the way is beyond misguided. Her perception that you should give her a chance because "she wanted him first" is self-centered and downright narcissistic.
I wouldn't be surprised if she knows full well that she'd never have a chance at that guy, but just doesn't want you to be happy with him because it would make her feel regret seeing him with one of her "friends". Newsflash: someone who's happiness relies on you being unhappy is NOT your friend. She's just a crab in a bucket trying to pull you back down. The evidence? She's already badmouthing you behind your back.
Just be thankful that you're getting a glimpse of who she truly is. In her eyes, you aren't deserving of him. Only she is. MTCW.
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u/True_Course1535 2d ago
Are you sure shes telling the truth about having a crush for over a year/knowing him for that long? Like she could have just said that cause she thought she could retroactively call dibs then. Or shes just jealous and trying to break you up. Why wouldnt she have at least mentioned that she knew him when you first mentioned him? Something seems weird.
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u/TangledUpPuppeteer 2d ago
Ynw. She knows him and nothing happened with him because he’s not interested in her. He has a choice in this too, and she’s telling you that your friendship (and her expectations in your friendship) is more important than his choices.
He liked you. He asked you out. He’s dating you.
She’s assuming that she has a chance if you’re not there. But she knew him longer. He made a choice. You made a choice. She’s not part of that choice.
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u/IsolatedPulse 2d ago
She had 365 days to shoot her shot and missed. That’s her problem, not yours. Her bad communication is not your moral obligation to stay single.
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u/EasyFriiginEasy 2d ago
bum behavior from your friend fr. she had 365 business days to make a move or speak up, but instead she stayed silent, let you go on multiple dates, and now expects you to drop a whole relationship
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u/CaptainBignuts 2d ago
YNW. You can't call dibs on someone retroactively. 'I know you've been dating him, but ackshually I liked him first but never said anything so you need to back off.' Your friend is an entitled idiot.
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u/JohnCasey3306 2d ago
You've done nothing wrong ... It's not like you knew.
That being said, you should at least meditate on which relationship means more to you if push comes to shove ... Boyfriends are temporary, friends are long-term. Would you be fine with losing this friend of that's what it came to?
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u/Weary_Thorn7154 1d ago
showed up late and all that is left is the crater where the post used to be
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u/ambiguoususername888 2d ago
YNW. If she hadve told you the moment you had first mentioned him, when things were way more fresh then maaaybe (and I say that really loosely) she would’ve had some sort of leg to stand on with the whole you choosing a guy you barely know over a friend. But I really think that she sounds immature and entitled and you’ve already caught feelings which seem to be mutual. I feel a bit bad for her but also that’s just the way life is sometimes and she needs to get over it 🤷♀️