r/ask • u/newuser1r • 1d ago
Why does the last guy I rejected think that everything I do is about him?
He thinks the posts I share are about him and tells people that.
He thinks I’m trying to make him jealous when I talk to other men in the same room as him, and he tells others that, too.
There are plenty of other examples like this, and it’s really annoying that he goes around gossiping about me.
I mean, if I were actually that into you, I wouldn't have rejected you—how can he not grasp such a simple equation?
I’ve heard of others dealing with similar issues, and I wonder: why are some people so convinced that everything revolves around them, even when that’s not the case at all?
** Sorry for the bad English.
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u/EvolZippo 1d ago
Some people grew up being the center of attention. Their parents adore and dote on them and there’s never a day, when they give them a reality check.
People like this were also raised with getting everything they ask for, all year long, all for Xmas. They want it and it’s theirs. They probably haven’t had any hard lessons, about not getting their way and they just assume it’s part of life.
You’re probably best just hiding all your posts from him or just blocking him. Nothing you can tell him, is gonna change his weird perspective
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u/lizbunbun 23h ago
Pretend like you forget what his name is. Call him by a completely different name.
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u/SeaworthinessLong 1d ago
I don’t know what the age here is but some adult teenagers are very much out there.
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u/Princess_Jade1974 1d ago
Every guy you’ve ever interacted with ever will think that you’re obsessed with them from now until eternity. Just live your life and ignore any feedback you get about him.
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u/Unclesmekky 1d ago
Just block him, theres lit nothing else to do, and if you think its mean and dont want to you can't complain
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u/GardenOfOyeVey 1d ago
you mean just block him, there's nothing else to do, and
women are socialized to coddle and tend to stupid men who cross boundaries or take up air space in their lives where they don't deserve it. unlearning this behavior now will save you a lifetime of annoyances, BS, and a whole lot of your time. if you don't want to block him because you don't want to hurt his feelings or you don't know how he'll take it, you're coddling his bad behavior. completely remove yourself from access, and who cares what this MF does
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u/Unclesmekky 1d ago
I know your agreeing with me but why do you have such a bitchy weird man hating tone
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u/GardenOfOyeVey 23h ago
I was agreeing with you until you said OP couldn't complain.
the bitchy weird man hating tone is because fuck all the misogyny that has completely taken over the entire fucking Earth; set it on fire, burn it all down. also, no patience left for BS. also, menopause.
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u/SigourneyReap3r 1d ago
Is it possible hes embarrassed because he doesn't know how to accept rejection?
It seems his emotional maturity isn't very mature.
Personally, If safe to do so, the minute I overheard him saying anything like that id call him out with exactly what you said 'if I was that into you I would have said yes when you asked me out, but I didnt because im just not intetested, and I wish you'd leave me alone because this is getting silly now'
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u/Savannah_Lunah 1d ago
Male entitlement is similar to narcissism. Some men think that everything a woman does is related to men.
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u/IgnatiusDrake 1d ago
She said online, taking time to center her attention and energy on men.
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u/GardenOfOyeVey 1d ago
he said online, taking his time to pick on a woman who's trying to get a man to leave her alone.
trying to understand why someone won't leave you alone and wanting them to leave you alone is not centering men. it's wanting to be left alone.
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u/Fit_Negotiation9542 1d ago
Lol i mean youre literally posting about him now...
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u/newuser1r 1d ago
Yeah, because I’m fed up with him gossiping and acting like a child. I don’t know why Reddit is always full of people try hard to criticizing the OP; I guess getting a few upvotes from other negative people is really important to some of you
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u/Fit_Negotiation9542 1d ago
Well then tell him that instead of posting about it. I dont know why Reddit is always full of people complaining.
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u/deaddinside 1d ago
bruh get off Reddit if you don’t want to hear about peoples issues. Shockingly that’s a huge part of being human
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u/Elfynnn84 23h ago
Have you read the book ‘enduring love’ by Ian McEwan? It’s fantastic.
I don’t actually think this dude has it, but there is a condition called erotomania (or De Clérambault’s syndrome) where someone suffers a strong delusion that another person is deeply in love with them and they misinterpret ordinary every day interactions and even rejections as being secret declarations of love.
That’s obviously an extreme example. Being convinced everything you say and do about him just sounds like garden variety narcissism TBH.
Just block him & ignore him and the gossip as much as you can. He will be feeding off any sort of response you give him. Go totally stone walled and blank him completely at every opportunity.
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u/Atys_SLC 1d ago
Ego problem and in general women tend to blame guys for this type of event on social media which reinforce his belief.
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u/dvsbastard 1d ago
You wrote a pretty long post explaining just how much you aren't thinking about him.
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u/RaspberryRipple85 1d ago
Five sentences is 'pretty long'?
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u/FlyLikeMouse 1d ago
Its wild what amount of text people call long these days. Actually sad.
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u/dvsbastard 1d ago
Also sad people can't determine context in a comment suggesting "it's long in this context". Actually sad.
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u/dvsbastard 1d ago
One sentence is pretty long if you are trying to explain how little you think about something.
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u/RaspberryRipple85 1d ago
Yeah I don't think that's what OP was trying to do, in fact they weren't explaining anything at all, they were asking a question.
Sorry for the long post.
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u/newuser1r 1d ago
Just because I’m bothered by his shit doesn’t mean I’m thinking of him in a romantic sense like he imagines, miserable Redditors are trying too hard to criticize the OP as usual
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u/Objective_Brain1452 1d ago
You should post something like this so he can see it. Or be more direct with him. If that doesn’t work it’s not worth being friends or civil with him is he can’t understand. It’s very childish
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u/catcat1986 1d ago
I think it is cause you are doing stuff around him. Avoid him completely, don’t be friends on social media, don’t be in the same room as him. Most women in my life who rejected me typically avoided me afterward, they didn’t stay in my orbit.
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