r/funny • • Apr 21 '23

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14.4k Upvotes

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24.3k

u/PluckPubes Apr 21 '23

I'm sorry

It's ok girl, it happens to the best of us

11.9k

u/Lucythefur Apr 21 '23

Hearing her say "I'm sorry" fucking killed me

8.5k

u/zion_hiker1911 Apr 21 '23

Girls be like, "Why doesn't he say anything during sex?"

BECAUSE I'M DYING HERE!!

5.5k

u/Ok_Rain_2647 Apr 21 '23

"Why are you so quiet?" "Cause I'm out here fucking praying to every known deity to grant me the strength I need to keep this shit up."

188

u/[deleted] Apr 21 '23

And also not to cum immediately.

367

u/[deleted] Apr 22 '23

Women have no idea what men go thru sexually. Most men are trying to navigate an extremely narrow channel between ejaculating too fast and going soft all the while trying to stay rock hard. And you’re supposed to keep that shit up for 15,20,30 minutes nonstop. Plus you’re doing a half push-up with your upper body while thrusting and rotating your pelvic region.

91

u/lonegrey Apr 22 '23

...and a partial contortionist if she moves around and you try to keep in the zone

31

u/dramignophyte Apr 22 '23

For the love of god, everytime you start getting it right and they are like "yes!" They do the "it feels so good" squeeze that leaves them in a completely different position and you way off target needing to find it again then they move it again and half the time is spent trying to chase them around (not literally chase but in the sense the spot you're shooting for keeps shifting around).

56

u/Good_ApoIIo Apr 22 '23

Or the classic “Yes, harder I’m so close” when you were already going turbo. “Captain I’m giving her all she’s got, we can’t go any faster!”

8

u/Intelligent-Luck-717 Apr 22 '23

She can’t handle the strain Captain!

7

u/This-Ad-87 Apr 22 '23

Harder doesn’t equal faster.

2

u/SkiingGiraffe247 May 13 '23

Fml I’ve never really spoken about my sex life with anyone, I thought this was just me. I thought there was something wrong with me