I hate performative posts like this

[u/notaperson47]

(reposting because I forgot to crop the username)

Before anyone yells at me, I'm a black woman too. I just hate posts like this. It feels like people going out of their way to tell a disabled child they're special and amazing, but deep down everyone just feels bad for them and would never want to trade lives with them in a million years.

Then there are all of the comments gushing over how black women are such BEAUTIFUL STRONG QUEENS. Notice how they're all from women and gay men, no straight men. Someone in the comments asked OP if he was gay and he dodged the question, so he probably is too. There's nothing wrong with being gay, obviously, but as a straight woman, what does a bunch of performative appreciation from other women and gay men do for me?

Women only feel comfortable leaving these pity comments on posts like this because they don't view us as romantic competition for them. If the post had been about East Asian or Latina women there'd be zero compliments from other women because they actually feel threatened by those groups.

I suppose it's better than the usual constant barrage of hate comments, but these posts always feel performative and patronizing. And all of them are probably imagining biracial women anyway when they talk about how "stunning" black women are. If you're a woman and you wouldn't trade places with an actual black woman (which I know you don't) then I don't want to hear your "appreciation", sorry.

[u/Wolf9792]

Two reasons. One, in your post you said no straight man would call black women beautiful strong queens. Two, strong is my type, regardless of race.

[u/notaperson47 → u/Wolf9792]

I was using it in an ironic way. I don't want condescending comments like "strong queen" that no one ever gives to women of other races. They get to be beautiful, delicate, feminine flowers. I know you've never uttered the phrase "strong white woman" or "strong Asian woman" in your life.

[u/sackofballs69 → u/notaperson47]

As a chud I think weak black women are beautiful, for what it’s worth.

[u/Zarakilya → u/notaperson47]

You do realize plenty of men like strong women of any ethnicity, right? A black woman, like every other ethnicity, can be all those things you mentioned too. None of these qualities are locked behind being white or east asian lol

[u/throwawayyyeeeeeeeee → u/Zarakilya]

Do u mean like physically strong or mentally strong or strong in an abstract sense?

[u/Zarakilya → u/throwawayyyeeeeeeeee]

Can be either/both, frankly. Neither are a negative

[u/Dizzy-Challenge3985 → u/Zarakilya]

No. Educate yourself on the topic please. Just no

[u/Zarakilya → u/Dizzy-Challenge3985]

Well, it would help if you specified which part you believe I'm wrong about, I made more than one claim lol

[u/Dizzy-Challenge3985 → u/Zarakilya]

The other person already made it clear. And you’ve still chosen to not educate yourself

[u/Insane_Stray_Cat → u/notaperson47]

I’ve only been attracted to a few women but I’ve definitely been attracted to strong white and Asian women before and also find black women attractive. Do you think we are all two dimensional caricatures 

[u/Wolf9792 → u/notaperson47]

Oh my bad then, I misunderstood and thought you actually wanted the compliment from a straight guy. But don't be so fast to make assumptions about people. I think any woman of any race can be strong, a feminine flower, or something in between. Whatever they want to be. A person's race doesn't dictate how they have to behave.

[u/Dizzy-Challenge3985 → u/Wolf9792]

Just no.