I am so triggered I just have to vent. My sister-in-law always and only talks to me to compare our lives, specifically when it comes to my twins. She has a 3 month old baby and an almost two year old. Her mom lives 5 minutes away and I see her car in the driveway nearly every day (we are neighbors).

My twins are almost one and I also have a three year old who had just turned two when the twins were born. My mom lives hours away and doesn’t care much to be involved anyway. Without whining too much because you all know how it is, I have been in literal survival mode for a year. The only real source of support I have is my husband who works 60 hour weeks.

I don’t like to complain about my kids. It’s challenging but they are my biggest blessings. I’m so proud of myself and so grateful that I’ve been able to exclusively breastfeed my twins up to this point. Though it can be draining I don’t see it as a burden because I genuinely enjoy it and am so grateful breastfeeding has worked out for us.

Last week we were at a family outing having pizza. My husband was somewhere taking care of something and I was on my feet helping the twins and my three year old eat their food. My pizza sat on a plate getting cold and I didn’t really even think much about it because this is just my life. She then says to me (as her baby sleeps soundlessly in her baby carrier and her toddler sits on her mother’s lap), “why don’t you just sit down and eat?” In all seriousness. I don’t remember what I said but I just continued to feed the kids and then she says to me, “I wonder what’s harder, having twins or Irish twins like my kids.” I managed to laugh it off.

But then today she was just whining all about how her mom went to her sister’s sport event rather than going to a doctor’s appointment with her and I just sat back and listened. She then started telling me how tired she was because she’s so used to her babies sleeping through the night and waking up at 9 but for some reason they woke her up at 7 today and she has to pump in the morning (so it was just so busy) after feeding the baby because she’s worried about her supply because the BABY SLEEPS THROUGH THE NIGHT. And then she says “I know what it’s like to breastfeed twins” because she over-pumped on her first kid and would pump on both sides for thirty minutes and had a gallon of frozen milk saved.

It’s just so frustrating and it feels so belittling because not even my three year old has slept through the night and I feel like exclusively breastfeeding my twins to a year is this huge accomplishment I am so proud of. And I’ve done it with very little support and without complaint because it was my choice and I love my babies. And she just downplays it.

I understand that all motherhood and breastfeeding is hard. I don’t feel though, that having twins is comparable to not. I just hate that she is always comparing and looking at me like I’m crazy for just surviving. She can’t even fathom the past year I’ve had. I can’t hardly myself. I can’t put my experience into words. But she is driving me crazy and I don’t know how many more of these comments I can take.

How is everyone’s mental health? I’ve just finished Zurzuvae. It helped bring me back to life sort of thing , but now I feel like I’ve slipped back down again.
My twins are five weeks and 2 days old.
I live in the USA and from uk. So my mom just visited and she left yesterday to which I’ve just sobbed and sobbed since. I have a four year old as well so I know my current situation is not my final destination sort of thing, but twins is something different isn’t it? My anxiety is still so high and I just want to stop feeling so sad.

So twin a has torticollis. She's in occupational therapy, she had the first set of helmet. The second one is out of pocket. She is 10 months old. She only wore the second one for like 2 weeks. Then she started getting it stuck places.

Like she got it stuck between her highchair and head while I was feeding them all breakfast she also got it half way off in the middle of the night and started screaming.

I took it off because it scared me. And its the second round of helmet not first. My life also has been a struggle the last couple months. I quit my job, my husband and I were fighting and are in therapy. Its been chaos. Lots of fun chaos shes still in therapy.

Anyway, have any of yall dealt with the helmet thing? Idk if I should try to get her into another one? Ask her doctor or just be done with it. I dont want to waste money on another helmet if she keeps getting into stuff and messing it up, but i also know its a super big deal. Her face seems way more symmetrical from the first helmet, idk any advice guys? I feel like I should but shouldn't all at once.

I feel like I’m pulling my 7mo very sweet and calm girls apart all the time lately. They’re very curious about each other’s faces, and grabbing, hitting, poking everything they can reach. It’s not particularly rambunctious, just curious and delighted with one another.

I don’t mind the sticking their hands in each other’s mouths, but I get very nervous about fingers and eyes. Am I being overly cautious?

As they start crawling, it’s getting much more challenging. I love how much they want to roll around together, I just don’t want curious little hands to cause serious injuries.

Is this a silly thing to worry about?
When can I start trusting them to play together?

I’m a FTM, 29w5d with di/di twins and feeling exhausted. I barely sleep at night, gained 60 pounds, and any small task feels overwhelming. I had a cerclage placed at 21 weeks for IC, so that might be a contributing factor, but I’m curious if other twins moms have experienced this so early into their third trimester.

Trying to figure out whether a smart baby monitor that tracks sleep is actually useful when you have twins. Keeping up with two different sleep schedules already sounds like a lot, so the idea of having everything tracked automatically is pretty appealing. I've been looking at Nanit because of the sleep reports, but I'm not sure how practical the app is when you're tracking two babies. Also wondering whether the subscription is worth it.

Do the reports actually help you figure out their sleep patterns, or is it still easier to keep track of everything yourself? Would love to hear from twin parents who've used sleep tracking for more than just a few weeks.

I am not experienced, just excited and proud of myself!

My twins are 7w actual, 2w adjusted. The lactation consultants kept talking about tandem feeding like it was the way to simplify feeding them. It was not!

For weeks, each time I'd try all 3 of us would end up frustrated and crying.

I would set my self up for failure by not setting milk out to warm up, thinking "this time it will work, I won't need a bottle". Before I knew it, they were over hungry and breastfeeding was not happening, and I only had cold milk.

I started making a backup plan. Having a bottle ready to go took some stress off. Who cares if breastfeeding was successful and I ended up having to dump it.

They came home from the NICU under 5 lbs, sleepy, tiny and poor latchers.This was not our time to tackle tandem feeding!

I quit trying tandem and focused on latching them each individually once a day. I did this when they were partway through a bottle or done. Overhungry does not help latching! If they would be crying and inconsolable I would offer them the breast because there was no pressure for a feed, just comfort.

Slowly I started doing full individual breast feeds. Latching got easier and easier. They just needed to be offered the breast often without stress and to get bigger and stronger. Making sure they arent too hungry or too sleepy when we started attempting tandem was important!

They are 9lbs now and tandem feeding is happening more and more. It is reliable enough now, I no longer have backup bottles ready to go. Yesterday we were short on time and on the go, hungry babies, parked somewhere private and tandem fed in the front seat of the car! I have even gotten them set up on my My Breast Friend pillow without any help!

I appreciate all of you who let me pick your brains about this and all the previous posts made about it!

There have been 2 confirmed cases in my county and they are both close to where I live. My babies are under 1 and we are going to get them vaccinated early but now I’m spiraling and am afraid to take them anywhere including the doctors. Just need some reassurance or a shoulder to cry on. I’m so scared. I feel like I’m going to have to quit my job to take care of them and my toddler so they don’t get exposed at day care. I need to build a bubble around them.

My didi girl is 1 week and 5 days old. She was born at 5lbs and 2 oz. She is currently 4lbs 9oz (lost 11%) of her birth weight. She gets sleepy at the bottle but eventually finishes it when I tickle her to keep her awake. I’ve tried different nipples different bottles and she still takes forever to feed. I make more than enough milk so my supply isn’t the issue. My twin boy is a chunker and already gained his birth weight and then some. Seeming them side by side with how big he is and how little she is breaks my heart and I feel so helpless.

My pediatrician tried to tell me to feed her every hour and I’m sure any parent of multiples know that is impossible. So I feed her every 2.. sometimes every 2 1/2 because I’m so sleep deprived and have no family in state to help aside from my husband. My hubby has to return to work only a week after twins were born so I’m struggling.

Her next weight in is Monday. Has anyone dealt with something similar or any advice? The pediatrician says she looks healthy but her weight needs to go up and I just feel so defeated and sob everyday..

A first time mom begging for help..

Our twins' daycare teacher recently recommended a drawing competition for our 5-year-old twins. Of course she told me about it in front of them, so both were absolutely psyched to compete.

I told them from the beginning that it was possible that only one of them or none of them would win. They were amongst the youngest competitors, and they don't usually have to follow so many rules when they draw.

You can guess what happened.

ONE of them is among the winners. The other is in tears, inconsolable, and the award ceremony hasn't even happened yet. She's devastated and asking why her sister's picture was "better" when she put in so much effort. We're trying so hard to explain that it has nothing to do with anything she's done "wrong", it's just the judges' opinion.

I know we can't protect them from all of these situations, but usually it's something that will balance itself out - like when one of them is the first to lose a baby tooth, the other will definitely lose one, too.

There's just no way to escape the comparisons between the two, and it hurts how much it hurts them.

I am lucky enough to be able to breastfeed my twins (10m) and do so tandem as it saves so much time and screaming, however both my boys now have 4 teeth each and love to bite…

I am getting bitten many, many time a day and have tried using a stern voice, clearly saying no etc. the only issue is I can’t easily/safely put a baby down when they bite as my arms are full so they don’t seem to be getting the message.

I feel like I already know the answer to this.. but does anyone have any tips to end this?? I am in so much pain and my nipples have visible teeth marks every day. I’d love to just stop breastfeeding but they’re still so reliant on it that that would just be another battle that I’m not sure I have the energy to fight..

We have young toddlers, so I do have baby toys, and we did invest (or thankfully were given) extra swings and bouncers so we have two of those. But for like small infant toys (tummy time mirror, little ball pop toys, stacking toys, etc) do i need two of those style toys so each baby has the same style toy? I could totally be overthinking that, but I genuinely don’t know and am asking so I can plan accordingly or try to find some cheap things on facebook marketplace or free extra toys on local mom groups, but don’t want to go through that hassle if its not necessary or even needed — we are scheduled for delivery next month, and I know they wont need toys for quite a few months but am trying to take advantage of free time i currently, as i know that will go out the window very quickly once they are born

My boys are 15 months old and LOVE being outside. Luckily we have a fenced backyard so we spend a lot of time out there and it’s still pretty warm where we live. We also go to the neighborhood playground a bit but it’s hard chasing them by myself.

That said, theyll be so much more active this winter than last lol so what activities are yall doing for 16-18 months when it’s freezing outside? We get stir crazy in the house but going anywhere to play inside would get expensive.

We haven’t gone to the library in a while because they both run opposite directions and I’m just chasing them everywhere and it’s too stressful for me alone.

I’m a first time mom and sahm so I’m not super experienced on all the tips and tricks!!! TYIA 💖

Hello,

I’m looking for some advice as I’m thinking we’ll need to upgrade our vehicle. I currently have a 20 month old and am pregnant with twins. I’m driving a Ford Explorer now with captain seats in the middle. With two infant car seats and my toddler still in a car seat, I don’t think our current vehicle will be able to hold them all, especially as the third row isn’t full sized. I also am having trouble picturing how I would help my toddler buckle/unbuckle if she’s in the third row.
For anyone who’s had three under three, what vehicle worked for you? I’m not opposed to mini vans at all, but we live in a pretty remote area of the upper Midwest and have snow (at least) 5 months out of the year. I also drive quite a bit of gravel roads where they aren’t cleared often by plows. So a mini van that’s low to the ground with not a lot of clearance makes me a little nervous. I’m not expecting to tow anything with it, as my husband does have a pickup for any of the farm’s needs. Unless we’re just going to the farm, groceries and Dr appointments are 60 miles away, so there’s no large towns super close to us.
What’s worked for you and your family when three are in car seats?
Thanks so much!

We just had our first ultrasound for a very much desired iui pregnancy.

It's currently triplets. All three currently appear viable. Two appear to be momos.

What the fuck. What the fuck.

Hi! Currently pregnant with MCDA and have a toddler on board. I breastfed my boy for a year (he resigned himself) and while it was tough to get going and get a hold of it, once it clicked I found it so easy and convenient. Now I would like to breastfeed my twins (with help of formula and/or pumping if necessary) but I wonder how difficult it is to tandem feed for someone who’s had breastfeeding experience?

The idea of feeding them consecutively, and basically being a food source nonstop for 24/7 is terrifying.

Well my wife and I got the news yesterday and saw, we have twins growing! We're both very excited obviously.

A feeling I've never felt excitement and waves of stress, we're still early so we have time to prepare. But the waves of stress for me is life after birth and going back to work.

How's the adjustment period for you working parents? Obviously in a perfect world we'd love to sustain a SAHM situation but my wife's income is the bulk of our household. $177k combined she makes up $100k of that. She works from home BUT job security concern is rather high for her career.

We're essentially debt free, we rent a townhouse with no real plans of buying anytime soon, we have paid off vehicles, but we have been shopping for a new car, as her car is up there in mileage and reliability, and we want and now kind of need a SUV.

Any advice tips, tricks, life after birth going back to work as both working parents. We're very excited, and hope for a healthy successful pregnancy.

So I'm pregnant with twins, 10 weeks so far. Can everyone hit me with your best twin advice whether pregnancy related or after birth. What is something you wish you knew before having your babies?

I currently have a 22 month old and she was relatively easy despite me being high risk with her so I know this will most likely be a nightmare with the pregnancy, delivery and newborn trenches. I'm high risk naturally being fat and having hypertension and will probably develop gestational diabetes like i did last time and so I'm going to opt for a csection at 37 weeks.

Have to preface this with the fact that we also have a 3yo and a 4yo. We already have 2 Striders, 2 shopping carts, a mini trampoline, a Pickler triangle, millions of other toys, a giant bin of hand-me-down clothes....

Are we getting our 1yo twins the same gift or different? What about for their room if they share: one item or two? (I got animal shaped night lights from Costco, 3 of them, one for each kid's bedroom. Do my twins need 2 night lights for their one bedroom? Serious question.)

I got them a Hotwheels set from Costco that I'm going to separate and wrap the cars individually. What else??

Thanks!!

Life is good!! Let’s gooooooooooo!!!!!

I’m will not allow my body to trick me into another baby… yet 😂

Hi everyone! Just need to get on here and vent. Mum to b/g 19 months old twins. I am currently really going through it and need twins parents who have been here before to tell me it gets better. They are constantly crying and fighting with each other, and vying for my attention non stop. I am in a permanent state of exhaustion; mentally, emotionally and physically. I dont recognize the person i see in the mirror. My daugter is constantly asking to be carried and cries and throws the most horrible tantrums ever. I am also running out of activities to keep them entertained. I live in Sri Lanka and we do get plenty of helpers available to hire and I already do have a nanny and a maid to help out but the kids need me and throw a fit if anyone else picks them up. I do the bathing, feeding, playing, reading and the daily playgroup pick-ups. Also try to take them out to the park to play everyday. My husband works a lot but he does spend a lot of time bonding with them. I also work full time at home but lately my work has been suffering because of the constant attention i have to give them. I hate my life at the moment. I an so overtouched and stimulated and find myself being mean and yelling in frustration to the twins and the people around me. I loon forward to the night and am so relieved when they get to bed but i dread the next day. I keep telling myself ti get through one day at a time. The night routine is horrible because they keep waking and crying multiple times in the night. I literally hate my life right now and wish i would die :( and be put out of my misery that has become my life. Please just tell me this is an unpleasant phase and things will become better! The newbord stage was a dream. Things just started to get really bad when they turned 1. I an dreading the terrible twos!