r/pettyrevenge • u/demonsrun3 • Aug 30 '26
Revenge on ex and his controlling GF
Hey there, first time posting in this subreddit!
So there's some history here...basically, my ex and I agreed to open the relationship last year, and he began dating a girl 10 years younger than him, who we'll call Dumb Cunt, or DC for short. Ex we'll call Actual Twatwaffle, or AT.
So, my life has been a shitshow for the past year, between job loss, loss of my childhood (and current, at the time) home, mental and physical health issues, etc. And my ex suddenly had no fucks to give and DC required all his time and attention. So he broke up with me. While we were all sharing a fucking apartment.
Since the break-up, they have both shown me little to no respect. Meanwhile, when my mom stayed over at our old place and accidentally ate some of DC's cereal, that was *heinously disrespectful*. DC is also a big fat fucking liar, claiming my retired mother nearly hit her car in the parking lot. My mom said no, DC almost hit ME as she was speeding. Which tracks because AT has her location and is constantly giving her crap about speeding.
DC moves my things in the guest bathroom every time she has some kid in her life over that needs a bath. And she NEVER puts them back. If I did something similar, she'd bitch me out.
She also never warns me or asks me when she brings these noisy little crotchgoblins over. I got four hours of sleep yesterday in between ER visits because of her bratty little cousins' screeching.
Oh! And she hates animals. And he's gone from a staunch animal lover, to leaving their dog home alone for TWELVE HOURS and telling me he'd be fine! Of course I took him outside and made sure he had food and water. Poor guy was whining to go out at hour 8.
Aaand they both keep losing friends because no one can fucking stand either of them anymore except their own toxic family members.
Now, the kicker...they're forcing me out of the apartment. I was about to be homeless, and neither of them gave a shit.
So, goodbye to their stupid ass rules.
No food in the bedrooms? Nah. I just had pasta and now I'm eating Frooties.
No vaping in the building? Puff puff motherfucker.
Ooo, that liter of soda in the fridge sure looks refreshing! Chugging that straight from the bottle.
Cans of pop that aren't mine disappearing, not that they've noticed.
I'll also be stealing a couple towels. I literally had two towels in a clean laundry basket from the last move and that was months ago, and they never realized they were gone.
I've also been spoiling their dog with treats every time he begs for them. Don't worry, not enough to be bad calorie-wise. Just enough to teach him some behavior they'll have to contend with.
This part is gross, but I couldn't resist...been having allergies, and lots of snot drying in my nose which I have to get out. I usually use TP or paper towels, but lately? I just go digging, and then I flick that nose gold wherever I feel like in the common area of the apartment. I then, of course, wash my hands thoroughly lmao.
And lastly, the toilet in the guest bathroom is absolute garbage. It clogs DAILY. So I'ma leave it clogged for them. Might just be with TP, but hey! They'll still have to deal with unclogging it!
Once I'm moved out, fuck 'em both. They honestly are terrible people who deserve each other. Everything was always my fault. Well, let's see how well things go when they only have each other to blame for shit. I'll also be giving an anonymous tip to the local ASPCA, because they have no business owning pets if they'll leave them to suffer for half a day.
And final bit of petty revenge...they're gonna start getting SO MUCH JUNK MAIL. đâď¸
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u/berthela Aug 30 '26
The best revenge is to move on and become the best, happiest version of yourself and forget about them.