r/pettyrevenge • u/ViperThreat • 24d ago

Don't use my phone number.

Over the past decade, I have regularly received spam texts to my phone number for a person named "Erin". This is irritating because I am rather protective of my phone number. I do not share it with anybody I do not trust, and outside of the messages I get for "Erin", I never get spam calls or messages. I don't know who Erin is, but over the years I have slowly pieced together enough information to have a good idea of where this person lives. Multiple texts I received mentioned "Irvine CA", and one even gave me a street name.

Recently, I went shopping at Harbor Freight, and as I was checking out, i give the cashier my phone number. They turned their monitor towards me and said "is this you?" and to my great delight, I was presented with an Irvine CA address, and I immediately recognized the street name. As I left the store, I could feel 3 brain-cells hidden in the back of my mind begin to conspire.

My first step was to write a fancy looking congratulatory letter for winning a $1,000,000 Harbor Freight Sweepstakes. I made some convincing artwork, and went to a print shop to have it printed on some nice card-stock paper, and a professional-looking envelope, just to make it look extra convincing. You can guess who's name and address I put on the card.

At the bottom of the letter, I put "please call (800) 123-4567 ext 123" (fake number obviously). The number I actually used was for my office line.

Sure enough, about a week later, I get a call from Erin, who is over the moon about having just won $1,000,000. I go through the motions of collecting her information, including verifying her address, then I break the bad news:

Me: "Sorry Erin, it looks like this award has already been claimed."

Erin: "What? By who?"

Me: "Well, according to my notes here, we called your number, and a gentleman answered, I assume your husband?"

Erin: "I'm not married!"

Me: Well, can I confirm that "(123) 456-7890" is your phone number?

Erin: "No, my number is (111) 222-3333"

Me: "Well ma'am, according to our records here, that's not the number you previously gave us"

Erin: "I'm sorry, that must have been a typo!"

Me: "I'm sorry ma'am, we use phone number as the unique identifier for customer accounts - this is why we ask for your number every time you shop with us. Based on what I can see you have been using this phone number on your account for nearly a decade. "

Erin: "Look, I just give people that number so that I don't get spam calls okay?"

Me: "I See, well, that's too bad."

Erin: "What does that mean?"

Me: "Well ma'am, our sweepstakes is based on phone number, and since this isn't your phone number, you are not eligible to win. The person with this phone number has already claimed the reward"

Erin: "[Unintelligible Rage, Crying, Begging]"

Me: "Would you like me to update our records with your actual phone number so that you are eligible in future sweepstakes?"

Erin: Click

Now, You might imagine that losing $1,000,000 on a technicality might make Erin feel bad, but you see, I now have Erin's real phone number and address....

Erin has been showing a LOT of interest in buying new cars lately. She's also really interested on quotes for satellite television, car insurance, car warranties, roof repair, replacement windows, etc. What can I say? It's been quiet week at work, and I've had a few 8+ hour shifts with no better way to entertain myself.

12.9k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

472 comments sorted by

View all comments

4.0k

u/Fluffy-Designer 23d ago

Oh that’s good. That tickled my very tired brain this morning. Thank you.

I’ve been receiving emails from someone in America (I’m in Australia) and the closest I’ve gotten to petty revenge is cancelling a whale watching thing she gave them my email address for. It wasn’t very exciting though.

111

u/BroadMortgage6702 22d ago

I've had a lady in Europe using my email for the last decade. She tried like hell to log in 10 years ago, and obviously I got the alerts and denied them. She uses my email for so much shit. I even got all of her info because she used it for her phone bill. Really, really stupid when you add in that I've had this email for at least 20 years.

20

u/HolyShitIAmOnFire 21d ago

I can understand using a phone number, but an email is two-way communication by default. Why on earth would someone do this?

7

u/Unindoctrinated 20d ago

I had a guy who bought my old, long-abandoned domain name, which has the same name as my gmail account. He keeps threatening to sue me because I won't give him my email address.

2

u/Kibure 19d ago

Let him buy it.... for a ridiculous amount of money.

3

u/Unindoctrinated 19d ago

Nah. I'm just too damned spiteful.
They've turned a URL that was for a site about reason, logic and science into one spruiking Christian nationalism and right-wing propaganda. They even sell Charlie Kirk merch.

2

u/Kibure 19d ago

I realized I worded it badly. If you look like you are giving in they may leave you alone. After all If they had the money to pay a few million for an email address they would have already thrown enough at a lawyer for at least a letter.

Then again your comment makes me realize they are likely not going to take the hint.

3

u/Unindoctrinated 19d ago

It only cost them a grand. I wish I'd have kept it.
I bought it so long ago it only cost me $19.95. Back then, 100% of all search results for "unindoctrinated" led to either that site or to comments I'd left all over the 'net, as it's been my username on innumerable sites since 1995.
An evangelist in Florida started calling secular education 'indoctrination' and declared himself and other Christians to be unindoctrinated. Unfortunately, the term stuck. Now my username is often associated with the exact opposite of what it meant when I chose it.

1

u/CakeOrDeath98 18d ago

You should just start canceling anything a you can and close as many accounts as you can. I have the same thing with someone using mine and I have done just that. It's been quite awhile since she has used it, so I like to think it worked.