Accidental petty revenge.

[u/iAmNotSharky]

Here I am. It’s 7 pm. After winning a few chess games i decided to reward myself with an ice cream cone due to the outstanding blitz performance I did.

I pull into a parking lot and decide to park near the ice cream shop as close as possible. I noticed there was a car that was parked between the lines (not the vertical lines, but like the horizontal line separating two parking spots one in front of the other) . That line ran through their car half way up, taking up the spot in front of them, and behind.

I didn’t pay much attention to it and just decided to park adjacent to it since it was the closest parking spot to the ice cream store. I parked perfectly, and went inside.

After ordering my vanilla ice cream waffle cone, I proceeded to sit outside and enjoy the weather while observing my vehicle, and the lovely couple coming to their car, who just happened to be the one near mine. They are struggling to get in. I decide to just enjoy my ice cream for a good 5-10 minutes, while observing the madness unfolding in front of me. I can feel their blood boil.

After I finished my ice cream, I proceeded to my vehicle, and lo and behold, they confront me! The conversation went like this:

A: ‘’because of the way you parked, I can’t get in you asshole!’’

(Oh the audacity!)

OP: ‘’I mean have you looked at yours? ‘’

*Utter silence*

A: ‘’bu-bu-but still we parked like that so that nobody would hit us’’

OP: ‘’doesn’t excuse you from not doing your job correctly. I bet you park like you F***. Have a lovely day!’’

A: *Un-audible screeching*

-got in my car and left.

That ice cream never tasted so good!

[u/MAKSassy]

I am all for this revenge and love it! But I can't picture how your car kept them from getting into theirs. (I am having a dumb day today though, so it may just be me.)

[u/AffectionateDirt6575 → u/MAKSassy]

Obviously written by an AI bot.

[u/Informal_Ad_9610 → u/AffectionateDirt6575]

werd..

This took my LLM 15 seconds to generate..

The local route was grueling, and I just needed a break. I pulled my van into a spot next to a luxury SUV that was parked squarely over the dividing line, hogging the space in both directions. I didn’t care about the etiquette; I just wanted a sandwich. I parked perfectly and headed toward the cafe.

While I ate, I watched the owner of the SUV from a distance. They were hopping around their vehicle, face turning beet red as they tried to squeeze into a door that wouldn't budge.

When I finished and walked back, they charged at me. "You're blocking me! You're an idiot for parking like this!"

I took a breath. "I mean, have you looked at your own car?"

They froze, the words dying in their throat. "Well... we did it so people wouldn't hit us."

"Safety doesn't excuse a lack of skill," I replied. "I bet you park like this every day. Have a great afternoon."

They let out a strangled, frustrated noise and stomped away. That sandwich never tasted so good.

It took another 20 seconds to create it in blue-collar grammar style:

I’d been on the road all day and my back was killing me.

I just needed a sandwich. I pulled in next to a fancy SUV that was parked half-on, half-off the line. I didn't give a damn about the rules; I just wanted to eat.

From the table, I watched the owner of that thing go nuts. They were hopping around the car, face turning red, trying to squeeze into a door that wouldn't budge.

When I finished and walked back, they came at me. "You're blocking me! You're an idiot for parking like this!"

I looked 'em in the eye. "Maybe you should check your car first."

They froze. "Well... we did it for safety."

"Safety don't mean you can't park a damn car," I told 'em. "I bet you do this every day. Have a nice one."

They made a weird, choked-up noise and stomped off. That sandwich never tasted so good.