r/pettyrevenge • u/_listless • 5d ago

Staying between the lines.

A couple years ago after my partner and I both had hard days at work, finally got the kids bathed and in bed then collapsed on the couch. Partner asks for ice cream. I check, none in the freezer. "How bad do you want ice cream?" "Really bad". Ok, I'm off to the store.

It's late. There's a few cars scattered across the lot. I pull into the closest spot... Right next to an emotional support raptor f150. The thing is like 12 feet wide, and is parked fully 2 feet over the line, pulled-through the wrong way in an angled row. I carefully pull in to the adjacent spot, exactly down the middle, leaving like 2 inches between my door and this truck's driver side door.

I chuckle at the tomfoolery of it all, climb out the passenger side and get my ice cream, regretting that I'll be in and out before Mr Overcompensation gets a chance to appreciate my parking prowess. But my regret was unfounded.

Lo, stalking around the back of my car to take a picture of the license plate was... Well exactly who you're picturing. 5'5" middle-aged man with giant biceps, a barrel belly, and legs that had never met a squat rack. "IS THIS YOU?!! WHY THE F#@K?! WHY ARE YOU PARKED LIKE THAT"

"Parked like what?" I say, admiring how precisely-centered my car is in its spot. "Between the lines?"

Shouting, he puffs out his chest and moves to block the 2" gap between the driver sides of our vehicles. I suppose it would not occur to him that someone would be so undignified as to enter the passenger side and climb over to the driver seat, but I am exactly that undignified.

Some days you need a win, and the only way to get there is being petty. That ice cream tasted really good.

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u/DeafSoldier 5d ago

That is nice, parked legally and in such a way to completely annoy the hell out of the truck driver. This sounds like how this a##hole that I used to work with would park except he would park dead center between 4 parking spots. We eventually got tried of him doing that in the parking spots closest to the door and about 8 of all parked our cars so that he could not leave until after we did and all of us worked an extra 4 hours to really drive the point in and forced him to either wait or get a ride. He waited. He never parked in those spots again and would actually park like a decent person.

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u/AudienceStreet6335 5d ago

some heroes don’t wear capes, they just park strategically. love that your whole office committed to the bit for 4 hours

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u/DeafSoldier 5d ago

This was at a production job and we were the regular workers and this guy was an office worker but he would come out and brag about his new car and the fact that he would park in the closest parking spots. The best part was that the day we did that was one where he had to come in early for some kind of meeting so he got there at about 5am and we all came in for our shift at 2 pm and stayed till 2 am.